A God-awful Small Affair

Lana Del Rey - Born to Die

2012-01-26T19:56:00.004Z

There hasn't been this much fuss made over a pair of American lips since Monica Lewinsky. It was all so promising at the beginning - the nostalgic amateurism of the music video for last year's Video Games dazzled an online audience and the sinister, deathly tinge on her breed of romance enchanted many.

And there's little on show here that'll hush the haters - she nonchalantly sings "money is the anthem of success" in a way sure to prompt much sardonic eye-rolling - but there're times when I'm convinced that many online music fans will hate over the most pathetic of things. The issues of her authenticity are pooed when you pore over the careers of David Bowie and Madonna, and any qualms over her supposed plastic surgery are frighteningly shallow at best. When did music become such a hotbed of misguided misogyny? Why can't popstars just emerge without about seven million claims of falsehood and artificiality, now?

The album begins with the title track - a blisteringly poignant ode to fatal romance accompanied with a lavishly decorated music video, that sees Del Rey die in the arms of her model boyfriend. How James Dean, you might mutter. Musically, though, the track swells and sighs with unfaltering majesty and it's all made to look easy: "let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain" is about as mysterious as the lyrics get. "He doesn't mind I have a Vegas past" she pouts in the opening to 'Off to the Races', which sees the introduction of more urban tints as seen in Video Games. The trip-hop background effects here though do little more than distract, and the lyrics drown in materialism. Easily the greatest track for me, 'Blue Jeans' sulkily drifts around in the hope of gaining as much devotion back as she proffers. With a tune slightly reminiscent of Chris Isaak's Wicked Game, it's a beautifully orchestrated paean.

Then, of course, there's 'Video Games'. Somewhere along the way of dissecting her potential and examining for cracks in her artifice the fact that this is a phenomenal song seems to have been tossed aside. I'm sorry, but every time I hear a throwaway comment about how poor a singer she is, or how 'bad' this track is, I want to shove glass in their face. It's flawless. After browsing through a handful of her demos (some under the name of Lizzy Grant) there came a broad range of tunes that shared similarity with 'Diet Mountain Dew', and that's somewhat taken the lacquer off of the track for me - and ultimately the lyrics let it down. The gloomy strings return on 'National Anthem' and, occasional lyrical blunder aside ("Money is the reason we exist, everybody knows it, it's a fact, kiss kiss" being particularly toe-curling), it thrives off a catchy tune and a rich instrumentation.

The formula (of strings and love-you-til-I-die lyricism) certainly wears thin at times: on 'Dark Paradise' some rather forgettable verses sadly intersperse an otherwise fine chorus. One of the more conventional pop songs is seen in 'Radio', though the F-bomb is dropped into the chorus for caustic effect. Reportedly her next single, 'Carmen' is an unusual choice for such duties. It twinkles and paints Lana in a sugary-sweet light, if that's the desired effect, but otherwise it stumbles along uneventfully (until the French spoken-word ending, of course). On the other hand, 'Million Dollar Man' oozes pop hooks (One for the money, three for the show...) and is easily the sultriest of Del Rey's vocal performances.

A dabbling of electronica slots into her country scenery on 'Summertime Sadness', which disappointingly resorts to a game of "Repeat the title" in lieu of a real hook. Finally 'This Is What Makes Us Girls' is the only track available that I can truly be a hipster about, because I prefer the demo version. Nonetheless, it's a solid climax to the album and aptly concludes an album centred around feminine vulnerability (though I'm sure pointing out that theme will piss off someone) and romantic longing influenced by the movies.

It seems quite futile to try and accuse a woman so blatantly fond and inspired by classic Hollywood imagery of unoriginality. Perhaps it's the bad habit of musical journalism nowadays to be skeptical of every new popstar (thank you, Britney) and her credentials - but here, I find nothing to be disappointed by. There's no false labels or pulling of your arm: it's a solid, admittedly not spectacular, debut from a musician with a handful of stand-out moments that should be commanding our attention. Now if she could polish up those live performances she'd give us fans less of a need to defend her all the time.

Rating: 7.5/10
Highlights: Blue Jeans, Video Games, Million Dollar Man, Born to Die
Avoid: Diet Mountain Dew, Carmen, Summertime Sadness

Artwork Watch: Much could be said of its plainness but it's a bit shit really isn't it?
For fans of: Lauryn Hill, Paloma Faith, softcore pornography, lavish styling

My Top 100 Tracks of the Year - Part Three

2011-12-18T04:56:00.002Z

#50 - "Bumper", Cults
#49 - "Towers", Bon Iver
#48 - "Buoy", The Joy Formidable
#47 - "Best Thing I Never Had", Beyoncé
#46 - "Asthma Attack", CockNBullKid
#45 - "I'll Be Yours", Those Dancing Days
#44 - "White Limo", Foo Fighters
#43 - "Ice Cream", Battles
#42 - "Lucky Day", Nicola Roberts
#41 - "House of Balloons / Glass Table Girls", The Weeknd

My Top 100 Tracks of the Year - Part Two

2011-12-16T01:39:00.002Z

#80 - "Parentheses", The Antlers
#79 - "End Come Too Soon", Wild Beasts
#78 - "Her", Tyler the Creator
#77 - "Desire", Anna Calvi
#76 - "Futura", Battles
#75 - "Sophia", Laura Marling
#74 - "Dirt", WU LYF
#73 - "Make Some Noise", Beastie Boys
#72 - "Lady Luck", Jamie Woon
#71 - "Reach A Bit Further", Wild Beasts

#70 - "Jealousy", Will Young
#69 - "Change", Glasvegas
#68 - "Crystalline", Bjork
#67 - "For Love I Come", Thundercat
#66 - "Machu Picchu", The Strokes
#65 - "Grace", The View
#64 - "A Dedication", Washed Out
#63 - "Still Life", The Horrors
#62 - "Hair", Lady GaGa
#61 - "We Found Love", Rihanna

#60 - "Paradise", Coldplay
#59 - "Armistice", Patrick Wolf
#58 - "Let England Shake", PJ Harvey
#57 - "Super Bass", Nicki Minaj
#56 - "No Church In The Wild", The Throne
#55 - "Mutual Core", Bjork
#54 - "The Morning Sun", Beady Eye
#53 - "Let's Roll Just Like We Used To", Kasabian
#52 - "The Plains/ Bitter Dancer", Fleet Foxes
#51 - "No Light, No Light", Florence + the Machine

My Top 100 Tracks of the Year - Part One

2011-12-15T02:52:00.002Z

#100 - "Second Chance", Peter Bjorn and John
#99 - "She's Thunderstorms", Arctic Monkeys
#98 - "Color on the Walls (Don't Stop)", Foster the People
#97 - "Dead and Gone", The Black Keys
#96 - "Iris", Emmy the Great
#95 - "Live Those Days Tonight", Friendly Fires
#94 - "Turning Tables", Adele
#93 - "Feel So Close", Calvin Harris
#92 - "Changing the Rain", The Horrors
#91 - "Dear Friends", Elbow

#90 - "Americano", Lady GaGa
#89 - "Rubber Ball", Cage the Elephant
#88 - "Princess of China (feat. Rihanna)", Coldplay
#87 - "I Know Places", Lykke Li
#86 - "The Ballad of Mona Lisa", Panic! at the Disco
#85 - "The Beast", Laura Marling
#84 - "I Deserve It", CockNBullKid
#83 - "The Shield and the Sword", Clare Maguire
#82 - "Observe the Skies", British Sea Power
#81 - "Sun of a Gun", Oh Land

My Top 50 Albums of the Year - Part Five

2011-12-14T17:00:00.002Z

#10 - "Gloss Drop", Battles
Genuinely one of the most fun records I've heard all year - dizzyingly energetic and full of weird grunts and guest appearances that all mash together to make one gooey, unusual mess (mess can be a good thing, right?) And as usual the drumming is superb.

#9 - "Conatus", Zola Jesus
For someone to release an album every year is quite admirable, but for them to improve in quality is quite unexpected: her previous two releases, as well as the majority of her extra singles and EPs, have often treaded too close on the line between art and boredom, but Conatus reigns in the hazy edges and polishes them into excellent, beautiful songs.

#8 - "Biophilia", Björk
In a year where I fell more and more in love with her, this seemed to polarise critics. I'm firmly in the fan camp, though, and Biophilia's thematic backstories and cohesive sense of minimalism made this a really gentle but fascinating experiment.

#7 - "The English Riviera", Metronomy
Maybe there's a little bit of hometown bias in my placing of this album so high, but in all honesty can you blame me when it paints Torquay as some kind of tropical idyll? I've lived there 21 years, I can tell you it isn't, but at the same time the sunkissed bliss of this album made me think twice about that.

#6 - "Watch the Throne", The Throne
It's unlikely you'll see so much bragging and arrogant boasts on album again quite like this - choice quotes being "Jesus was a carpenter, Yeezy laid beats" and "I guess I'm getting high on my own supply" - but lately it's like Kanye can't do anything wrong by me. Tune after tune after tune but some heartfelt sentiment ('New Day' finds the pair hoping for the best for their future children) made this more than an ego boost.

#5 - "Helplessness Blues", Fleet Foxes
It might not have strayed too far from the blueprint to their debut self-titled album, but this somehow excelled it. Mellow, poignant and opulent, it's like stepping into another world.

#4 - "50 Words for Snow", Kate Bush
Speaking of stepping into fantastic worlds, there's still noone as richly descriptive and simply beautiful as the undisputed goddess of music, Kate Bush. At first glimpse the long track lengths might put you off, but with a little patience the rewards are almost spiritual. Even the descent of a 'Snowflake' is poised with angelic vocals and sombre gentility - and this is perhaps my favourite Kate record since Hounds of Love.

#3 - "Hurry Up, We're Dreaming", M83
An endearing, exciting and innocently conceptual album, this touches virtually every aspect of nostalgia and emotion through the means of some brilliant, brilliant pop songs.

#2 - "Bon Iver", Bon Iver
Another act that it took me time to get into, Bon Iver's follow-up to the highly revered For Emma, Forever Ago far exceeded their debut in my opinion. The vocals are divine, the far-away romantic instrumentals shine beautifully and the emotion is heartbreaking.

#1 - "Let England Shake", PJ Harvey
This has been predictably anticipated as the #1 of many many lists and that's not to be taken for granted: the sheer power and overwhelming bleakness this record paints of modern England is undeniable. You'd have to be made of stone not to get shaken a little by this, and as usual Harvey's careful yet exuberant arrangements and unusual means of getting her message across continue to bewitch me, and pretty much the rest of the music world.

My Top 50 Albums of the Year - Part Four

2011-12-13T19:40:00.002Z

#20 - "A Different Kind of Fix", Bombay Bicycle Club
This was the year they progressed past the point of a one-hit-wonder in my mind (Always Like This) and this record possesses a great number of hooks and tunes.

#19 - "Dye It Blonde", Smith Westerns
Richly influenced by David Bowie, T. Rex and, more recently, Suede, it's naturally packed to the brim with a heap of glamrock goodness.

#18 - "Zonoscope", Cut Copy
Amazing tune after amazing tune. Along with Metronomy they've seen multiple tracks end up on my going-out playlist, and kickstarted summer that little bit earlier.

#17 - "Cults", Cults
I instantly fell in love with the pair once I heard 'Abducted', and that was just one of a selection of infectious, retro pop songs.

#16 - "Smother", Wild Beasts
I missed their first two albums entirely and have still yet to investigate them, but this stood out this year for me because of its intimacy, great songwriting and some excellent vocals (if you like Antony and the Johnsons, you'll like this).

#15 - "Lupercalia", Patrick Wolf
I'd always regarded Wolf as a pretentious outrovert that was all style, no substance, but this year's record totally turned that on its head. A beautiful, romantic album that's just laced with ecstacy and has soundtracked the recovery from a personal hell this year.

#14 - "The Golden Age of Apocalypse", Thundercat
I started the year hoping for another Janelle Monae and this was as good as I got - not to say I was disappointed. A dazzling and fascinating merge of classic jazz/R&B and futuristic landscapes that really grew on me.

#13 - "Skying", The Horrors
Listening to this is one of the closest experiences you might get to flying - just staggeringly epic and imaginative.

#12 - "Yuck", Yuck
Almost every song here has ebbed away at my subconscious at some point this year and they really should've got more attention. Excellent, excellent songwriting.

#11 - "Within and Without", Washed Out
Probably the sexiest album of the year (and not just because of the sleeve), it's an intoxicating record that resparked a very-much-dead love for synthpop.

My Top 50 Albums of the Year - Part Three

2011-12-12T14:29:00.002Z

#30 - "Mirrorwriting", Jamie Woon
Fuck James Blake. This was the interesting post-dubstep solo album of early 2011.

#29 - "The Big Roar", The Joy Formidable
It was just a refreshing surprise to see that Wales actually has good acts. Name me another one. Go on.

#28 - "21", Adele
The statistics speak for themselves. A few dud tracks but at its best it was painfully and resonantly emotional.

#27 - "Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds", Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds
I know I worshipped the pants off of it in my review but an enduring love for the top 25 has put this in a surprisingly low position.

#26 - "Submarine OST", Alex Turner
The only soundtrack placing on my list, Submarine was a small but sweet collection of lovely songs culminating in the excellent Piledriver Waltz (which the full band sadly destroyed)

#25 - "Anna Calvi", Anna Calvi
It must have been quite frustrating for a breakthrough artist so noticeably similar to PJ Harvey to release an album this year, but Calvi brought a tonne of 50s Western influences for one of the coolest records of the year.

#24 - "On A Mission", Katy B
I slightly underrated this upon its release because of a little scepticism for the UK garage genre - and I still maintain that it's 90% shite - but Katy B has pretty much dominated my party playlists this year.

#23 - "EUPHORIC /// HEARTBREAK \\\", Glasvegas
Another band that, prior to 2011, I loathed (mostly on account of lead James Allan's conduct in interviews and press appearances) but their second release was a deliciously dark and rich wall of emotion that was impossible to avoid.

#22 - "Wounded Rhymes", Lykke Li
The only non-Brit in this segment, Lykke's debut back in 2008 failed to impress - but the classic rock-n-roll songwriting here helped reign in her passionate energy into something much more intriguing and attention-grabbing.

#21 - "A Creature I Don't Know", Laura Marling
I'm beginning to think that Marling could record an album whilst sat on the toilet so long as her beautiful Joni Mitchellesque chords and vocals are present, and I'd love it.

My Top 50 Albums of the Year - Part Two

2011-12-12T01:51:00.002Z

#40 - "Holy Ghost!", Holy Ghost!
If you're going to buy just the one synthpop album from 2011 - this is very much one of the frontrunners. Listen to 'Do It Again' now.

#39 - "Twist Again", Bodies of Water
I still much prefer the band's outings as 'Music Go Music' but if you're a little afraid of ABBA revivalism and fond of folky nostalgia, this won't disappoint.

#38 - "House of Balloons", The Weeknd
I didn't review this when it came out because it totally escaped me, but having downloaded it a couple of weeks ago I found it surprising, exciting and basically what Bon Iver might have been had they worked more with Kanye West.

#37 - "Veliciraptor!", Kasabian
It was totally daft but it's nice to see that at least one British mainstay has retained the ability to put out an album of original tunes *glares at Beady Eye*

#36 - "Angles", The Strokes
I really wanted to place this higher on accounts of its highlights, but a wobbly middle section was picked up upon by more reviewers than me - some brilliant songs though.

#35 - "Rolling Blackouts", The Go! Team
Energetic, vibrant, silly, catchy and wonderful. In that order.

#34 - "4", Beyoncé
It was no 'Sasha Fierce', but nothing has made me so joyfully flamboyant this year than 'Run the World (Girls)'. WHO RUN THIS MOTHA?

#33 - "Nine Types of Light", TV on the Radio
Sadly accompanied by the death of bassist Gerard Smith, the alternative 00s gods put out a wonderfully eclectic album this year that was maybe a little too out-there for the critics.

#32 - "Adulthood", CockNBullKid
British popstars, and I mean pure popstars not Adele-powerhouses or Florence-weirdos, have been sadly lacking this year but one stands head and shoulders above the rest.

#31 - "Build a Rocket, Boys!", Elbow
I don't care if they're boring, you try writing a song as blissfully beautiful as 'Lippy Kids'.

My Top 50 Albums of the Year - Part One

2011-12-11T22:07:00.003Z

50 - "Into The Murky Water", The Leisure Society
It failed to set the world alight as much as their 2009 debut did, but there was still something beautiful about this band and their penchant for full orchestrated songs.

49 - "Suck it and See", The Arctic Monkeys
Despite an initial burst of enthusiasm from me, this album has largely dropped off the radar for me. Whether this is out of a fondness for their earlier material, a higher placing for Alex Turner's soundtrack on Submarine or just a whopping lack of tunes is irrelevant - this album wasn't without its charm.

48 - "Mirrors", U.S. Royalty
Bold, brash and rather bloody lovely.

47 - "Go Tell Fire to the Mountain", WU LYF
The indie press might have raved about them like excitable lunatics, and it's certainly a decent album, but I can't really place it too highly here - again it's something I've loved for a brief period of time and feel little inclination to return to.

46 - "Bread and Circuses", The View
I started the year loathing them and have ended it with a big deal of respect for this, their third album, which packed more tunes than most indie bands can cram into a debut.

45 - "Born This Way", Lady GaGa
I was slightly generous with my score of 8.5 for this back in May, but whilst it was easily a worse record than 'The Fame Monster', it had a solid selection of nonsense pop tunes that were just let down by some unoriginal ideas.

44 - "The Hot Sauce Committee Pt. 2", Beastie Boys
One of only two reviews this year that's earned me death threats, but hey ho. The Boys had a triumphant return and, celebrity cameo videos aside, were on top form again.

43 - "Burst Apart", The Antlers
A genuinely atmospheric, dark and brooding album that tried its best to dampen my summer.

42 - "El Camino", The Black Keys
I've yet to review this, but it boasts just as many solid tracks as last year's 'Brothers', which is slightly remarkable given the time that's passed.

41 - "Wasting Light", Foo Fighters
'Walk' was my first choice of song for my iPod after stepping out of the house for a good fortnight or so, and this was their strongest album since One By One.

The Black Keys - El Camino

2011-12-08T02:04:00.003Z

How on Earth did they become the world's biggest rock band overnight? I was quietly slipping into Brothers (I'm aware that sounds vaguely incestuous but I'll leave it) and then BANG! they're on every advert, every video game and every movie soundtrack. They're that rare breed - the band loved by hipsters and rockers alike. They've got the Arctic Monkeys supporting them on tour. The hyperbole just doesn't need to come.

And yet, despite putting out an album pretty much every year, the Black Keys haven't lost their spark. Ignore this gaudy album artwork, El Camino is yet another turn of fiery, blustery rock anthems that're bound to thrill just about everyone.

Beginning then with single 'Lonely Boy' and its ridiculously funny music video, the track oozes radio potential and endless hooks that the band have been throwing about ever since taking on Danger Mouse as co-producer, really. Twee xylophones and joyous "na-na" chants find their way into the background of 'Dead and Gone', a frighteningly clingy lyric that's thumped home with their rockabilly drums. A slightly T.Rex opening to 'Gold on the Ceiling' is promptly given a modern twist with squelching synthesisers, and if anything just adds to the glam rock euphoria.

Before you fear they've turned up the angst on the opening to 'Little Black Submarines' ("a broken heart is blind"), out of nowhere the album's shrillest riffs kick in and steals the show. A more conventional effort is 'Money Maker', reverting to their standard drum-clap rhythms and advert-aiming blues riffs, but it just sinks into the depths of musical derivatives - therefore another bizarre hook surfaces on 'Run Right Back' and inspires thoughts of walking and looking cool and driving and being James Dean and stuff. Yeah.

They can pitch simple pop songs too, though - 'Sister' sounds a little like Garbage or No Doubt efforts from the mid-90s with its slick production and repetitive lyrics. 'Hell of a Season' too boasts effortlessly catchy riffs and basslines that combine into another fine pop song. The cymbal crashes and poppy edges of 'Stop Stop' border on the James Bond cabaret side of things but just on the right side of them.

A slight distance from their token American rock is seen then in 'Nova Baby' with a distinctly 2000s opening (think Yeah Yeah Yeahs), and the closing riffs really steal the show. To finish off with the band return to their Gold on the Ceiling 70s sounds with some honky-tonk pianos thrown in for extra sass on 'Mind Eraser'. It's yet another great.

It's just as though they can't do anything wrong. I'm not sure what it is in their water, but it's very bloody good. Whilst the UK limps around looking weakly for real rock bands in amongst their (indeed very good) indie scene, the US has a whole range to pick from. You'd do very well to choose the Black Keys.

Rating: 8/10
Highlights: Little Black Submarines, Gold on the Ceiling, Dead and Gone, Lonely Boy, Nova Baby
Avoid: Money Maker

Artwork Watch: Definitely up there with the worst of 2011.

Amy Winehouse - Lioness (Hidden Treasures)

2011-12-07T00:29:00.003Z

It doesn't take a lot to make me cry, but upon hearing the news of Amy Winehouse's death last year, I was sent into a fit of tears. The list of musicians who've had that effect on me only contains one other name (Michael Jackson). She was one of the first musicians that really tore me away from pop sensibilities and made me aware of (at least some of) the history of soul and blues music. In amongst all of the spite from the dark corners of the internet (fuelled by thoughtless posts like "this is hardly surprising" as though death should be measured by how jaw-dropping it is), there came some touching tributes, though, and the optimist in me says she'll be remembered as a fantastic talent.

The other side to the story, however, and it is a story, because her father keeps insisting on thrusting it into the tabloid-readership's faces, is that Lioness is a rushed, half-arsed cash scheme. There's a saddening lack of dignity displayed by Mitch Winehouse - but then, as the father of someone quite keen to teeter down to the pub and offer the paparazzi cups of tea, this might not be surprising. Perhaps then, the uncomfortability about this, her first (and last?) posthumous album, lies in the music itself.

It begins promisingly enough. Her cover of 'Our Day Will Come' slots right between classic hits of hers with a bittersweet optimism about the future, matching the musical stylings of previous stalwarts Just Friends or He Can Only Hold Her in a clear display of her influences and inspiration. The reggae tints courtesy of producer Salaam Remi are apparent on the first original track, 'Between the Cheats', a sturdy track but too nostalgic to make any exceptional impact. An early version of her hit single Tears Dry On Their Own then comes, and it's a notably darker and heartbroken version. Although nothing we haven't heard before, one can't help feeling as though this alternate reality is more convincing. Sadly, though, another reworking of the Carole King classic 'Will You Love Me Tomorrow' (following Winehouse's 2004 cover that appeared in the Bridget Jones movie) lacks any new perspective. The brass briefly enchanting, it's ultimately nothing new.

Nas then makes an appearance on 'Like Smoke', a cool and brooding track that seems as though it's in the early stages of a proper development. Another cover that noone really needed to get their hands on comes in 'Valerie ('68 version)' - a pretty standard and uninteresting offering. On the other hand, her rendition of 'The Girl From Ipanema' shows Winehouse channeling her Franker vocals, and, with its bossa nova sounds, its musical directions. Another original track, 'Half Time' places Winehouse in a club-singer frame, sounding more intimate and restrained, and the effect is charming. Things are stripped further bare on an original recording of 'Wake Up Alone', where her voice wrenches just about every listener's heart.

On 'Best Friends, Right?' we catch a glimpse of chipper Winehouse, and the production is at the album's strongest, throwing in all sorts of background twinkles and percussions. The famous Tony Bennett duet then plays out, and sadly the cover of 'Body and Soul' is all a little too Jools Holland indulgence to make any kind of exciting impact. Rainfall introduces her final cover, of Leon Russell's 'A Song For You' and it's all dramatic strings to bring down the curtains.

Of course, it was never going to be the album everyone wanted from Amy - but Mark Ronson and Salaam Remi have done a pretty decent job here. Although a little self-indulgent at times, and at others a shade too repetitive, there are enough fascinating glimpses and reminders of Winehouse's talents here to save Lioness from being a total cop-out. That said, I can't say it's made any lasting impression on my thoughts regarding her legacy, so it's a little bit of a disappointing conclusion to an enthralling, beautiful story. So long, Amy, and thanks for the memories.

Rating: 6/10
Highlights: Our Time Will Come, Half Time, Tears Dry,
Avoid: Will You Love Me Tomorrow, Valerie

Artwork Watch: Perfect photo, ghastly font. Quite symbolic - a true beauty being cheaply marketed.

Kate Bush - 50 Words for Snow

2011-11-18T20:35:00.003Z

In a world of ever-changing musical scenery and festering hype there can be some warmth in the solace that there's still some of the old pioneers still standing. It's no secret that Kate Bush is far and away my favourite female musician of all time, and I feel I needn't explain that decision. Thus the end of 2011 was an excellent one - as Christmas loomed, Bush invited the world into her frosty and enchanting creation, and as ever, the experience was a bit weird.

Everyone's already covered how she sings about having sex with snowmen and gets Stephen Fry to make up some new...uh...words for snow. But even musically, Bush has stretched herself here. The shortest track being a mighty 6 minutes and 48 seconds long, this is clearly a record to be taken seriously. What may have perished in potential for radioplay, however, is more than made up for with atmosphere and sensory indulgence.

To kick us off, Bush invites her son, Bertie, to sing over 'Snowflake'. A piano-led track that's quietly reminiscent of Ryuichi Sakamoto's work that most famously graced the soundtrack of Babel, we have here a ten minute description of the descent of a snowflake. As ever, though, Bush manages to disect each second into an eternity of agonisingly poignant and serene reflection. "The world is so loud. Keep falling, I'll find you," is a lyric that's difficult to ignore, and quickly wraps the listener up into a blanket of warmth. In 'Lake Tahoe' the lyrical theme gets a bit deeper: conjuring ghosts and dead dogs. Again Bush is joined by male vocalists with alarmingly higher voices than hers - which if anything adds to the eccentricity.

The album's longest track - 'Misty' - contains the much-discussed copulation with a snowman. Lyrically it's a stand-out: who else would have the imagination to suggest "His crooked mouth is full of dead leaves" or "his ice-cream lips"? The musical accompaniment is as restrained and subtle as ever; almost inviting you to fill in the spaces with your own emotions. Comparatively, then, 'Wild Man' is a snappy offering - detailing the quest in the Himalayas for a yeti - and thrives off of unusual loops and a triumphant, yet awkward, chorus. Few would've predicted an Elton John duet, and at first the prospect frightened me since he's about the furthest from subtle you can get. However, 'Snowed In At Wheeler Street' lingers sublimely. Their vocals collide in a way that accurately matches their doomed love story (he's gay for a start, Kate, you silly girl), and a persisting synth, as John says, "keeping the fire going".

Drums and rhythm finally find their way into the fray on the title track, where Bush is joined by Stephen Fry. Or rather, he's joined by her ethereal counting and sideline encouragement. "Stellatundra" is probably my favourite neologism, by the by. But any hope of an energetic tidal shift is dashed with the closer 'Among Angels', another strikingly bleak and minimal performance that stretches Bush's voice to the limits.

This is never going to be an album to stick on for drivetime accompaniment - but if you have the patience this is an intensely rewarding listening experience. The attention to detail and the slow pace might strike others as boring, but those others are fools. 50 Words for Snow is beautiful.

Rating: 9/10
Highlights: Snowflake, Among Angels, Wild Man, Snowed In At Wheeler Street
Avoid: n/a

Artwork Watch: Probably the least sexy kiss of all time.

Rihanna - Talk That Talk

2011-11-17T16:16:00.004Z

Too much of a good thing? Hell, it's not always been good. For every great pop song that Robyn Fenty has lent her well-worn hand to (What's My Name?, Man Down) there's been a shameless, tacky dud (S&M, Who's That Chick?) and whilst she's certainly got more personality and attitude than the majority of current popstars I can't help but wish she'd just go away for a bit. Just two years on after the release of her seminal Rated R - which really made the world sit up and listen - she's put out three albums and featured on 6 hit singles that aren't even hers. Sadly, and predictably (since to keep up such high standards in pop music would be nothing short of miraculous) the quality has suffered, and a largely terrible Loud might have shifted millions of copies but it seems with a Faustian bargain.

Faith was restored this year, though (and I do reiterate that it didn't take much since Loud had two or three phenomenal pop tracks) with the release of We Found Love, a breathless chart-topper with one of her strongest vocal performances and tunes to date. So maybe it's every odd year that she puts out a decent record.

We start then with second single 'You Da One', a fairly standard offering from Fenty that dilutes reggae diction with a heavy varnish of pop-shrillness and, far from an infectious Rude Boy thumper it just bounces along tunelessly and uneventfully. Thus the tempo is turned up on 'Where Have You Been?', a ferocious club proclamation that gets a little lost in modern pop's obsession for a grime breakdown but emerges somewhat more mournful than tacky. Single 'We Found Love' then arrives courtesy of a new producer in the form of Calvin Harris and, given my unbridled hatred for Dr Luke, this is a welcome one. As already mentioned, the track slowly but surely conquers those murky areas of your brain that Super Bass probably occupied the month before, and is a faultless dance track.

The first guest appearance from Jay-Z since the ubiquitous Umbrella, 'Talk That Talk' has a lot to live up to and, let's face it, won't stay atop charts for an entire summer, but thrives off a bouncy synth-reggae hook. Hooks and tunes all fly out of the window in favour of vulgar attention-seeking though on 'Cockiness (Love It)' that, intriguing backing vocal hook aside, rather predictably and tiredly begs "suck my cockiness, lick my persuasion" and... I just can't help but think how many children are going to hear this this year and it's just shameful. I might be prudish but it's just disgusting. Sex turns to ridicule then on 'Birthday Cake', a short, sharp and utterly bewildering blast of...well, the word "cake" about 100 times.

Quite why this is followed with the affirming and sweet 'We All Want Love' is beyond me but it does well to anaesthetise the previous 4 minutes of pain. The shift to cliché lyrics like "we all want to be warm when it's cold" might sacrifice a little in the way of originality but it's a message I'd feel much more comfortable listening to, and vocally she's superior too. I was bereft of anticipation for 'Drunk On Love' on account of my reverence for the XX's Intro and in all honesty it'd be nothing without the tune, but even with its tune wringed of all atmosphere it somehow entices me with Rihanna's vocal performance.

The dreaded "give it to me" lyric returns on 'Rock Me Out' and with it little tune or convincing grit, which is rare for Fenty, but this just lazily and boringly churns out another bit of musical foreplay. By 'Watch N Learn' the lack of motivation and urgency to rush this record out are obvious, and it's yet another unsubtle cunnilingus reference. Finally, 'Farewell' does much of what California King Bed couldn't but with the same tune: not pierce holes in me with a heinous voice. Here, she's more restrained and manageable, and that's probably a fair observation of the whole album.

It's essentially all of the last 2 years of her material condensed into their most simplistic formula. The tunes aren't as good, the lyrics are largely sexual and crude, and the 'swagger' (I do wish that word would fuck off) is undeniable, but I can't help but feel a little bit ripped off by what is essentially an annual marketing campaign now. But yet again I've fallen for it, and Talk That Talk is yet another focal point.

Rating: 6/10
Highlights: We Found Love, We All Want Love, Talk That Talk, Where Have You Been, Farewell
Avoid: Birthday Cake, Cockiness (Love It), You Da One

Artwork Watch: Okay, cool, sexy lips. But the facial expression and panda eyes? And with that top she looks like the Tim Burton reimagination of 101 Dalmatians (which will sadly probably happen one day. Fingers crossed for Helena Bonham Carter as Cruella!!!!)

Pixie Lott - Young, Foolish, Happy

2011-11-14T01:37:00.003Z

Once upon a time (some point in early 2009) there came a moment where Shaun Collins thought "yes, yes this girl is just what pop needs". Whether this was an abridging of my heterosexual tendencies remains a mystery, although an FHM cover didn't exactly hinder her chances - and to be fair I thought exactly the same thing about VV Brown and look how that turned out. Skip forward two years and what were some very fine-indeed singles along the lines of 'Mama Do' and 'Turn It Up' have been replaced, like much of British pop, by the unfathomable urgency to become nocturnal and 'party'. Y-fucking-awn.

Taking an album title from the 1968 Tams song of the same name, though, Lott demonstrates a prerequisite for various Motown, soul and classic R&B influences on this, her sophomore album. So whilst the use of the clubs in promotional capacities is to be understood from a marketing point of view, maybe it would be unfair to write Lott off as the product of executive remoulding. Certainly the album begins with promise - 'Come Get It Now' showcases an unedited, subtle and suggestive Pixie with an, admittedly lagging and uneventful, R&B flirtation - but single 'All About Tonight' brushes over all of her influences with a boring, thick sludge.

Vocally there's surprises abound on 'What Do You Take Me For?' with an unusual blend of synths and jazz instrumentations - guest Pusha T pushing it further towards a modern twist - but her shrillness suggests a defiance to conform to the husky pop princess she's surely being forced to become. A weak hook surfaces on 'Nobody Does It Better' but again she's vocally faultless, and when compared to her performances to come you'd probably best off savour that. 'Kiss the Stars', you see, is a flagrant rehash of Katy Perry soullessness (sample of choice here being quite similar to Firework) that posits Lott uncomfortably into some robotic elasticity.

She may secure a harmonica solo from Stevie Wonder on, er... 'Stevie on the Radio', but it never rises above 'alright', and as much as I want to defend her vocal ability it feels quite strained on the bleak romantic ballad 'Everybody Hurts Sometimes' - although a fine arrangement puts it miles ahead of other tracks. In the second of two not-as-good-as-other-songs-of-the-same-name events, 'Dancing On My Own' boasts lyrical masteries such as "They say it's supposed to make the heart grow fonder/ From all I can tell it couldn't be wronger". It has a fairly pleasant hook but again it's just...eh. "You bring out the worst in me" she invites on 'Love You to Death' with a surefire candidate for the most average album filler track of the year.

She does reinstate some fun on 'Birthday' with an innocent "oh-oh-oh" hook and some of Rihanna's Unfaithful piano chords, a familiarity that resurfaces on 'Bright Lights' (but that might just be Tinchy Stryder's relentless monotony). It's arguably got the best chorus, though, and finds a nice middle ground for Lott's vocals. 'Perfect' then plonks along with your typical lazy seduction number and is utterly forgettable. 'You Win' and 'We Just Go On' continue with the tired and predictable balladry before we thankfully reach the end with some diluted samba-pop on 'Till The Sun Comes Out'. It's fun, it's fine, it's this album at its best.

It's a totally dull record full of totally dull tracks that remind me of other totally dull tracks. It's neither offensively bad nor anywhere near 'good'. Typing sentences about her and her material is painfully difficult because there's absolutely nothing interesting to work with.

Rating: 3.5/10
Highlights: Till the Sun Comes Out, What Do You Take Me For?, Everybody Hurts Sometimes, Birthday, Bright Lights
Avoid: Kiss the Stars, Love You to Death, Perfect

Artwork Watch: It might as well be a Maxfactor advert. She clearly doesn't rely on her looks to sell records does she?

Cher Lloyd - Sticks and Stones

2011-11-13T03:13:00.003Z

Thanks to Twitter the art of criticism has taken a lot of the wind out of my sails. Why wait for a review when you can just check your name trending and see 3,000 death threats? Sadly, the venom and vitriol directed towards the world's rich and famous has come to be more covered than the poised judgments and critical reviews. There therefore came a requirement, a self-defense mechanism installed into the lyrics of the popstars, to brush aside such anger: and that's how the birth of 'haters' came about.

It's so convenient that music can now come with its own review. "You're a hater, just let it go" has become the catchphrase of a generation of clueless, tasteless, mindless and worthless pre-teens who've reached past the age where Barbie dolls are a go-to form of entertainment but are still aeons before any sense of self-respect. Lloyd, the fourth-placed contestant on last year's The X Factor, seems to have stuck in this awkward phase. Engaging with the trolls on Twitter far too often, Lloyd has become a poster-figure for the victimised - but I'm willing to bet that all of you reading this have received some form of hate-message at some time, and at the end of the day if you're going to dismiss Dannii Minogue's opinion you deserve it.

Of course there's always the option to "let it go" and totally ignore her music, but in doing so you'd be required to never enter the premises of a shop, restaurant, café, workplace or club that may, on a whim, play it. As tempting as the life of a hipster is, it's an expensive one, and one I can't afford, so let's just stick the knife in and get this over with. Sticks and Stones begins aptly with 'Grow Up', where Lloyd boasts "We're doing stuff and we don't ever have to tell our mums" over a tune a little bit similar to that new Toys'R'Us advert (a nice coincidence). Angry grunts on 'Want U Back' make it a league above the majority of other tracks given that it's being upfront about its gimmicks, and a strong chorus helps.

Second single 'With Ur Love' has a frustratingly catchy vocal hook (the title) and features a bafflingly-relevant (why?) Mike Posner to boost its street cred, but even at the heighty age of 21 it's lost on me. Easily the year's most angrily-greeted single, 'Swagger Jagger' then kicks in with its nursery rhyme (Oh my Darling Clementine) tune and angry wasp-sting synths, truly the council estate's answer to the Black Eyed Peas. She thankfully pins up the swag for 'Beautiful People' which at least demonstrates she appears to have some tolerable and, dare I say, pretty elements to her voice - and throwing on the unknown Carolina Liar helps reaffirm its palatability - but the tune reminds me a lot of Alesha Dixon's To Love Again, which is a bit of a shame.

In a brutal assault on the English language, Lloyd then fumes about the antics of those 'Playa Boi's with the wit of a year 3 playground pupil (literally using the line 'liar, on fire'). A fairly inoffensive tune then comes on 'Superhero', with Lloyd employing Rihanna-style vocal twangs for the chorus, and it's pretty decent. 'Over the Moon' starts much on the same wavelength with a nostalgic tune, but then gets put through the dubstep meatgrinder and becomes a series of references to her rise to fame (which, let's face it, was a hell of a lot easier than most), going so far as to reference Simon Cowell before using the line "I'm feeling tall, so tall like the Eiffel tower".

The introduction of dubstep wasn't really going to endear me, so 'Dub on the Track' can basically go on and do whatever it does that teenagers find so fascinating about this whole wubwubwub-WEEEEEEEEE genre. Final track 'End Up Here' is another self-referential chunk of autotuned chipmunk vocals, boring Facebook-update romantics and bland melodies.

So there. I'm a hater. Let it go.

Rating: 1/10
Highlights: Want U Back, Beautiful People, Superhero
Avoid: Swagger Jagger, Dub on the Track, Playa Boi, With ur Love, Over The Moon

Artwork Watch: How The Little Mermaid might have turned out had Disney been outbid for the legal rights by a paraletic Kat Von D.
For fans of: Destroying culture and Socratic society, piece by piece, with increasingly illiterate and self-aware talent-vacuums hellbent on addressing their own haters before they've been addressed themselves, bleeding away at the tabloid press and social media with non-stories and tantrums, with all the contained dignity of a fanny fart.

Snow Patrol - Fallen Empires

2011-11-12T21:48:00.006Z

Ah, good old Snow Patrol. For what seems like an eternity now the Northern Irish soft-rock gods have played second fiddle to Coldplay in the chart stakes - but that's not to belittle their success. The seminal Chasing Cars was crowned the song of the noughties by Channel 4 (UK) and has received a special award from Q Magazine, not to mention spending 106 weeks in the UK top 75 charts. Far from a one-hit wonder, though, the group are now on their sixth album - the second of which to reach the #1 spot - and show little sign of slowing down.

Sadly, the same cannot be said for their quality. As a big fan of Final Straw and Eyes Open, I was a little more than mortified by the complacency and mediocrity behind A Hundred Million Suns and the single 'Just Say Yes' that came with their greatest hits collection. Will Fallen Empires continue their careering decline, or kickstart a resurging for the band?

We begin with synths aplenty and distorted vocals on 'I'll Never Let Go', which draws more inspiration from the Yeah Yeah Yeahs than their usual efforts do, and it has an exciting pace to it - a pace sadly missing in single 'Called Out in the Dark'. Nonetheless, the electronica remains and it's a step forward for the band sonically, and has a fairly decent, if forgettable, tune. The band then quickly switch to a more conventional atmosphere on 'The Weight of Love', plodding along with an attempted dramatic drumbeat. The album's highlight though comes in 'This Isn't Everything You Are', where strings, drums and guitars work together to build their showcase 'epic' moment.

Elsewhere the highlights are mostly in the background, whether that's the backing vocals and violins on the otherwise dull 'The Garden Rules', the frenetic synths on 'Fallen Empires' or the music-box cutesiness of 'Berlin'. It seems that whilst the band are eager to experiment they've spread themselves too thin, and any sense of a cohesive album or theme have now long gone - but let's enjoy the highlights. 'Lifening' is a pretty Eyes Open derivative that relies on their reliable formula of strings and melancholy.

If you need one song about a departed lover who's left the singer for New York, go for Paloma Faith's. 'In the End' and 'Those Distant Bells' both drift past me every time I've listened to the album with absolutely nothing remarkable about them whatsoever, and whilst 'The Symphony' tries nobly to reinstate their newfound love for electronics, it comes off as a kids TV tune rather than anything substantial. Quite catchy though. "I'm aching from the bones, from the very blood of me" should tell you all you need to know about 'The President', but it's worth a listen or two if you fancy a bit of a weep. I'm not going to begin on the stupid poseur antics of placing a prelude at the end of the album, but 'Broken Bottles Form A Star (Prelude)' rounds the album off with a quirky piano splash that's more silly than interesting.

I'm a long way past caring about the exploits of Snow Patrol and that probably shows in the arrogance of some of my comments, but to be quite honest if you're looking for excitement or fulfillment in the band then you're wasting your time. They've peaked, they've got a great back catalogue for you to enjoy, but their new music continues to disappoint - but there is potential here in the more subversive elements.

Rating: 6/10
Highlights: This Isn't Everything You Are, Fallen Empires, The President, Lifening, The Symphony
Avoid: In the End, New York, Those Distant Bells

Artwork Watch: I can't name a single of their albums where the artwork has sparked interest, and that trend continues here.

Florence + the Machine - Ceremonials

2011-11-11T19:07:00.005Z

Q have announced this to be the album of 2011 (I started writing this review way after the 'publishing date', by the way, as I have done with many of my reviews since I format the images and rating system way in advance). As a huge fan of the Lungs album I was concerned that Welch would have difficulty in living up to her debut - where spirituality, atmosphere and guttural vocals all blended into some stellar performances (my favourites were Howl, Blinding and Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up) if you're interested). Yet it's with a mix of cynicism and defiance to her hype - particularly when much better albums have seen the light of day this year - that I must confess I'm disappointed in Ceremonials.

I try to judge artists fairly neutrally, even when they're ones I'm an observant fan of, which is why I mostly avoid the internet's breeding grounds of "she's sold out! / she's too mainstream! / she's repetitive!" nonsense. Perhaps it's Welch's own admissions of Ceremonials being a much happier, brighter album that can explain my mourning of her darkness:

"It does feel more joyous, but I wouldn't say happily-ever-after. It's not completely a case of 'Everything's fine, now!' because everything's still… Even if you're in a relationship things are complicated. There's probably lots of things to deal with."

I'd also like to take this opportunity to announce that she has fuck all on Kate Bush, and never will.

We begin, then, with resplendent harp strings and a resonant choir on 'Only If For A Night' and it's immediately obvious that Florence isn't holding back. "The only solution was to stand and fight/ my body was bruised and I was set alight" certainly hints at the physical ordeal that often seems thematic with Bush's work, but the next line, "But you came over me like some holy rite" effectively vaporises any comparison with Bush's often richly ornate lyrics - indeed, Welch only ever seems capable of vagueness at best. Second single 'Shake it Out' still to this day reminds me of Cyndi Lauper's Girls Just Wanna Have Fun in its chorus, but it's a bold, fun and catchy single that's worthy of praise - first single 'What the Water Gave Me', however, moreso. Rich in suspense and theatricality, it hints at Virginia Woolf's suicide with "the overflow" and "pockets full of stones", and its organ hook blends perfectly with the harps and crashing drums.

At times though it seems that Ceremonials is trying too quickly to jump into powerful ballads and melodrama. 'Never Let Me Go' features Welch on full-foghorn duties retelling her ready-to-die stance with some admittedly beautiful lyrics, but the arrangement just feels too bold to get immersed in. 'Breaking Down', however, features a whispery vocal and unusual note sequences for a much more natural and enchanting effect. 'Lover to Lover' to me just sounds like a bad Whitney Houston single, where a strong gospel influence jars uncomfortably with her unrestrained howls. Third single 'No Light, No Light' again reiterates my point that less is more, and although I have no real qualms with Welch at her most shrill (my undying love for 'Rabbit Heart' proves this) there's just a welcome relief when she suggests rather than exclaims.

There are other complaints than her vocals though - 'Seven Devils' is borderline absurd in its lyricism and atmospherics, sounding like a rejected Pantera track ("all your lies will be exorcised" / "I was dead when I woke up this morning"). Although throwing in a tribal beat might've risked more ridicule, 'Heartlines' is a fine, simple and sweet track about faith and destiny - slightly reminiscent of Björk's Earth Intruders with its primal energy. Similarly sweet, 'Spectrum' uses colour as a metaphor for romance and rejoices in harps and a bouncy rhythm - although her voice during the chorus could quickly grow to piss me off.

Perhaps the quietest and therefore unflorence, 'All This and Heaven Too' is an endearingly cute ditty that finds Welch unsure of what true love is - but it almost cheapens her with its obvious, universal themes (not worthy of the nation's gothic chanteuse, after all). Closer 'Leave My Body' hints at Platonic forms with the references to "higher ground"s and a prominent dissatisfaction with human life, and it seems such a shame she's left it this late to get mythological.

Because whilst there's a handful of hooks here, Ceremonials suffers from what I can only diagnose as collapsed Lungs. There are too many embarrassing lyrics and shrill, opulent masquerades on show for this really to hold any spiritual connection (for me, at least) and even the hooks are nowhere near as strong as Dog Days Are Over or Blinding. It's an album for the iPod generation - you can pick and choose your highlights and throw away the rest. That's not the hallmark of a good album.

Rating: 5.5/10
Highlights: Breaking Down, Heartlines, What the Water Gave Me, Spectrum, No Light No Light
Avoid: Seven Devils, Lover to Lover

Artwork Watch: It doesn't really feel very 'her'. It's also totally unimaginative.
Bonus material watch: If she'd ditched Seven Devils and Lover to Lover for the unusually sinister 'Remain Nameless' and the brilliantly rhythmic 'Bedroom Hymns' we'd probably have a much better reception.

Justice - Audio, Video, Disco

2011-11-10T02:10:00.003Z

Even 2007-Shaun, a past version of myself that was often far from musically-adept, could appreciate the immensely happy and infectious tracks that emerged from Justice's debut, Cross - particularly D.A.N.C.E. and We Are Your Friends, the hits which propelled them into mainstream dance giants. Unsurprisingly, the duo refuse to stray too far from the sonic formula that made them big - and Audio, Video, Disco has consequently divided opinion over their musical progress.

From the get-go, with rip-roaring 'Horsepower', Justice are in familiar territory. Sounding closer to the soundtrack to Street Fighter or Gladiators' theme tune, it carelessly chucks out 8-bit synths and epic solos that are a little bit kitsch. First single 'Civilization', accompanied with my favourite music video of the year (where buffalo stampede through falling replicas of classical architecture), is a hotbed of suspense and crashing energy - sadly an energy that rarely gets reintroduced throughout AVD.

'Ohio' though is an intoxicating blend of gospel-whispers, classic hip-hop indulgence and French-renaissance instrumental samples, featuring someone from Midnight Juggernauts (?) Around the 3rd minute mark though it reverts to a classic Justice squelch. There's something of the 70s about 'Canon', particularly its 'Primo', though - think Led Zeppelin gone electro. They'll go on to strongly emulate Queen later, but for now 'Canon' almost defiantly kicks glam-rock riffs in your face but sadly lacks in direction.

Morgan Phalen's vocals go some way in reinforcing the prog-rock influences - 'On'n'On' freely sings about girls and drinking with a clear Kashmir pastiche. From Ledzep we go to Queen on 'Brian(May?)vision', with unabashed guitar solos, and a heavy We Will Rock You ersatz in 'Parade' - the latter of which is far too imitative to really stick out with any merit of its own. The journey through hard-rock enters the 80s and the drivetime-epic sounds of 'New Lands' that are easily more compatible with electronica, and it's markedly catchier than its predecessors.

We're then given a small glimpse of silly-Justice on 'Helix' with a disco-funk tune randomly interspersed with some dude's random moans and 'yeah's. It's perhaps at their most light-hearted that the French duo make their most irresistable music, but then the shift of genres could be to blame for some of this record's failings. That they should choose to end with the title track is a small miracle, then, given its less direct samples of classical genres. Of course, the killer synth hook gives it its sheen.

Perhaps they're just running out of hooks - but, whilst I don't criticise their forray into alternative genres and influences, it's their childlike vibrancy that's sadly sparse on their sophomore record. There are fine tracks, though, and I'm not too worried yet about the direction they're going in - as long as they manage to rekindle their audience with...well, electronic music again.

Rating: 6.5/10
Highlights: On'n'On, Civilization, New Lands
Avoid: Parade

Artwork Watch: Not a tombstone. Not a tombstone. Not a tombstone. *blindly looks forward to Album #3*

Kelly Clarkson - Stronger

2011-11-09T17:48:00.003Z

The talent-show contest has rarely produced fruits as lasting as Kelly Clarkson outside of the country genre. It's been 5 albums and 9 years since the Texan shot to fame on American Idol and she's enjoyed worldwide success thanks to genuinely-great pop songs among the likes of Miss Independent, Since U Been Gone and My Life Would Suck Without You. But let's not get ahead of ourselves here - aside from the rather excellent Breakaway, Clarkson, like most pop prodigies, has failed to deliver on albums. That trend doesn't look set to change.

We begin with the earworm single 'Mr. Know It All' and its typical you're-a-guy-you're-a-dickhead shtick and a remarkable semblance to Bruno Mars' Just the Way You Are. Vocals aside it's a total pastiche and when you're rechurning year-old tunes you've got a bit of a problem on your hands. Shameful. However, there's better news with 'What Doesn't Kill You (Stronger)' which takes influence from her own earlier career as well as the electropop-melancholia of Robyn or Kelis. Lyrically she's again full of clichés ("doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone", "just me, myself and I"...), but it's a fine pop song.

It's not all ballsy power-anthems though: 'Dark Side' warns a lover of her potential to falter and imperfections (although the power-pop chorus would go against the start of my sentence). 'Honestly' is an emotional plea for faith and devotion that ably demonstrates Clarkson's vocal abilities. After a while though the self-flagellation begins to get irritating: 'You Love Me' continually spins out the self-deprecating metaphors after (another) awry relationship that -gasp!- suddenly turns into "you're not good enough!"

The most horrific lyrical inclusion comes courtesy of 'Einstein', though: "I know that I'm no Einstein but I know that dumb plus dumb equals you". It only marginally stands head and shoulders above the other 4-year-old grasps of love, though. The Disney channel moments continue into 'Standing In Front Of You', which is just begging for a Wizards of Waverly Place montage or something equivalent. 'I Forgive You' again carries an immediately-obvious melody and despite the attempts of a synth-riff to vary it up a bit, it's pretty safe for Clarkson (but at least solid - especially when compared to the middle-of-the-road bore 'Hello').

"I used to let you paint a pretty picture" sighs 'The War Is Over', one of the more tolerable "You don't deserve me" (her own words) tracks on account of its tune. There's some musical diversity (although don't get to hoping for a jazz-solo, it's more of a Maroon 5 track) in 'Let Me Down', one of the record's strongest vocal hooks. It seems she's most comfortable and effective on the soft-rock riffs along the lines of 'You Can't Win', perhaps asserting her independence and empowerment that little more ably, because as lovely as 'Breaking Your Own Heart' might sound by Taylor Swift, with Clarkson it just lingers damply.

So: some good songs. Some bad ones. Still, with only 6 co-writing credits out of 13 tracks you can hardly go running to the hills singing her praises, or scathingly attacking her for that matter. The nicest thing I can say about this album is that it won't be any worse than putting a Taylor Swift record under the Christmas tree for your teenage daughter - but it won't be any better than Katy Perry. At least she has some tunes.

Rating: 5/10
Highlights: Honestly, What Doesn't Kill You (Stronger), Let Me Down, The War Is Over, Dark Side
Avoid: Mr. Know It All, Einstein, Hello, Breaking Your Own Heart

Artwork Watch: Sure to do wonders for the metal-eating community around the world.

M83 - Hurry Up, We're Dreaming

2011-11-07T23:45:00.003Z

Even two or three years into my amateur music-writing I still find myself suddenly surprised by a musical phenomenon that's inexplicably missed my radar. M83, the five-man project from the beguiling mind of Anthony Gonzalez, have now gone a decade without so much as a tickle at my sensory feet, but earlier this year that changed (thank you, Niall, I know you're reading xoxo). There's something of a naivety about M83's music, like the direct antithesis to Sigur Rós' grown-up ethereality, and the nostalgia even finds its way into the packaging and marketing of Hurry Up, We're Dreaming, turning into a two-disc conceptualisation of dreams and imagination.

There are worse ways, too, to start an album than with an intro called 'Intro' featuring Zola Jesus. Shoegazing synths serve as little more than background noise compared to the echoing howls of Danilova and Gonzalez, before turning into a U2 tribute act on 'Reunion', which is as giddily excitable as they come. Of course the blistering single 'Midnight City' is slotted between the two in case you needed any more electronic dazzlings. Surely a potential candidate for the next Orange or O2 adverts, 'Where the Boats Go' then blasts some lamenting chords in your face for an extra dollop of 'epic'.

It's not all earth-shattering optimism though: the bleak 90s balladry on 'Wait' singlehandedly dispels all of the reverie that had previously occurred, crying "There's no end/ There is no goodbye/ Disappear with the night". To follow that with a child's anecdote about frogs and faraway fantasies is quite challenging, but the undeniable cutesiness behind 'Raconte-Moi Une Histoire' is just lovely. After a quick 'Train to Pluton' with fairly unremarkable horns, 'Claudia Lewis' greets us with some slightly shrill Empire of the Sun-like melodies that suddenly crash into funk-pop sensation. The crashes continue with 'This Bright Flash''s drums, before the first CD ends with 'When Will You Come Home?', a brief-but-beautiful starscape that hints at isolation before being reassured with 'Soon My, Friend' and its swelling promise of "I'll be yours someday".

Already this has been quite the sonic ordeal, but 'My Tears Are Becoming A Sea' sounds exactly like you'd expect an M83 song called such to sound, all slow and afflicted to begin before an almighty electric-guitar breakdown. Although the switches feel slightly bipolar by this point, the trippy indie-rock bursts from 'New Map' shine through and revert the themes to their vitalising selves. Classic synth-pop finds its way into every pore of 'OK Pal', a daftly catchy track that shimmers a little too brightly for me at times. 'Another Wave From You' seems to almost replicate the stormy emotions of Where The Boats Go, condensing more plight into 2 minutes than most can.

An obligatory piano ballad makes itself heard in 'Splendor', but it quickly drifts off into choral sighs and almost-narcotic highs. 'Year One, One U.F.O.' slaps down some nice riffs into what's otherwise been a predominantly electronic album, but 'Steve McQueen' quickly erases all memory of it with arguably the strongest hook and most frenetic instrumentations of the whole album. 'Echoes of Mine' feels like more of the synth-bluster we've heard just moments ago, and 'Klaus I Love You' welcomely varies the scenery with some classic Human League-style beats. For the 'Outro', Hurry Up fades gently away into strings-oblivion, vowing "facing tempests of dust, I'll fight until the end".

In an unimaginative pop environment it's records like this that continue to offer hope to those of us who've chosen to follow everything regardless. Every second of this expansive album seems to matter to Gonzalez and co., and its sheer ambition and execution is quite fantastic.

Rating: 9/10
Highlights: Wait, Midnight City, Steve McQueen, Splendor, Raconte-Moi Une Histoire, Claudia Lewis, Soon My Friend
Avoid: Train to Pluton seems quite pointless, but isn't terrible.

Artwork Watch: Halfway between a still from Doctor Who and a Debenhams advert for snuggies.

Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds - Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds

2011-11-04T01:46:00.005Z

Just before we start: yes, I'm team Noel. Yes, Liam Gallagher's a cunt. Yes, their feud is boring now. Yes, this is better than the Beady Eye album. That's all that'll be said of the UK's favourite music topic here. The tabloid spats are all quite irrelevant really when you consider the music on offer; and it's some of Noel's strongest in his entire career.

Opener 'Everybody's on the Run' positions Gallagher in a gritty motivational epic that thrusts strings, tambourines and heavy percussions at the listener with gusto, virtually yelling "Hang in there, love!" As blustery and exciting as it may be, it fades into comparison when pit against the classic songwriting that's to follow: 'Dream On' is classic Oasis from start to finish. Slightly nonsense lyrics are effectively veiled with a stomper of a rhythm and tune.

The single 'If I Had A Gun...' muses beautifully:

Let me fly you to the moon/
My eyes have always followed you around the room/
'Cos you're the only God that I will never need/
I'm holding on and waiting for the moment to find me

with a hint of '(What's the Story?) Morning Glory' in terms of the backdrop. The debut single 'The Death of You and Me' then strongly replicates The Importance of Being Idle's psychedelic laziness, but with a distinctive tune of its own to save it from being too similar.

One of the most exciting tracks for me, though, is 'AKA... What a Life!' - full of wistful moodiness and by far the most vocally exhilarating. There's a strong Kinks influence (although that might be the opening "village green" lyric talking) about 'Soldier Boys And Jesus Freaks', with vaguely political lyrics and a resonant brass instrumental to add to all the hubbub. I'm not quite sure what all of the 'AKA's are about but 'AKA... Broken Arrow' follows and it's another clear throwback to the early 90s material that made Oasis the enduring pop-rock Gods they...were a few years back.

It's not all Oasis-revivals though: '(Stranded On) The Wrong Beach' is darker and much more American than you'd come to expect from the Britpop giants, but for me it feels too rebellious from Gallagher's tried and tested format that it comes off as unfulfilled. Closer 'Stop the Clocks', on the other hand, a reworking of one of Noel's self-penned 'favourites', gorgeously culminates the record with choirs and a 'Champagne Supernova'-style majesty.

It might be a little shortlived, but this as a debut record was everything that 'Different Gear... Still Speeding' was not: well-written, carefully-planned and thankfully neglecting to blatantly rip-off a John Lennon tune. At least we still have one functioning Gallagher to be proud of.

Rating: 8.5/10
Highlights: AKA...What a Life!, The Death of You and Me, Stop the Clocks, AKA... Broken Arrow
Avoid: n/a

Artwork Watch: "It is blurry and blurs are mysterious and ooh is this really Noel and ooh what will it be like?" are some thoughts that you might have.
For fans of: Well... Noel Gallagher.

Feist - Metals

2011-11-03T18:29:00.004Z

i did not start this review a month ago thinking that I'd have nobody else interesting to get through, no, that is not what happened at all. Here is a picture though:

the album is fine and not 'not fine'.

there are songs and they are all varying degrees of pleasant.

there are no songs as good as 'Limit to Your Love' either so I think James Blake might be a bit buggered come difficult-album-#2.

shame because he's very 'in' right now isn't he.

here is another picture.

this review is not the core formula of all of my others

i didn't even mention track names.

they just all bore me and there's nothing interesting about her or them.

Rating: 5/10
Highlights: no
Avoid: meh

Artwork Watch: Well it has an oddly-shaped tree and the album title is upside down, so it must be brilliant.

Zola Jesus - Conatus

2011-11-02T23:49:00.008Z

She certainly churns out the studio albums, doesn't she? Despite a breakthrough in only 2009 (I think I have socks that predate this), Zola Jesus is already on her third album and has managed to squeeze out 3 EPs to correspond with them. In the same week that Rihanna's manager has spoken out about the necessity of popstars to release more than one record every 3 years (as some kind of pitiful excuse for her saturation and quite-easy-really guest spots every month), you could be mistaken for thinking we're supposed to have the attention spans of stoned pre-teens. If you are a stoned pre-teen, though, keep reading. There's a Mars bar at the end of this page.

I'm getting sidetracked. So the album. After a minute or so of ethereal whisperings and sighs on 'Swords', 'Avalanche' kicks in with a disjointed beat and dark synthetic backgrounds. Vocally she's at her best here, but there is a concern with how indecipherable her lyrics are. The single 'Vessel' is quite remarkable; drawing upon Massive Attack trip-hop influences with a little touch of Nine Inch Nails-industrialism to just maximise its eccentricities, whilst retaining a fascinatingly sinister rhythm.

Several instrumental additions find their way onto Conatus - indeed she didn't use the latin for effort limply - and the strings behind 'Hikikomori' rejoice with a slight Florence + the Machine romanticism. 'Ixode', which to the best of my Googling knowledge is the latin term for the animal genome of ticks, pulses with minimal itch-inducing, and continues this ambiguous vocal pattern - ultimately excluding the listener more than anything, sadly - but all the while remaining quite majestic in delivery. Background chants and a pointedly poppier instrumental aptly summarise 'Seekir' - indeed it slightly echoes the Yeah Yeah Yeahs' Zero from a distance - and there's an increased clarity in her vocals.

There's a slight Patrick Wolf tint about some of the tracks here - none more so than the introduction to 'In Your Nature', with its something's-about-to-happen strings and tribal drums. A further turn to conventional melody is seen in 'Lick The Palm Of The Burning Handshake' with its slow piano tune, but the background remains as bewitching as ever. "It takes you over, again and again" is cried to add to the melodrama. Quite the oddest track, 'Shivers' employs an almost M.I.A. approach to instrumentalism and as such beeps and clashes away like a malfunctioning printer. It's of course held together by the sweeping strings, but feels a little too puncturing to fit in with the rest of the album.

Particularly when followed by the minimal beauty of 'Skin', a slow piano ballad that could quite feasibly be derived from the works of Einaudi or Glass. So I'm quite a big fan of that. She then opts to bow out with a massive synth, 'Collapse' quite lives up to its name: "Oh it hurts!" is howled on a number of occasions. Probably should've warned you that this isn't the most uplifting of records.

Critics have been quick to cite this as a step towards a poppier Zola Jesus, and I guess a few of the unmarketable eccentricities have been ironed out of her, but there's no loss of artistry or quality to mourn; if anything she's continuing to flourish as a songwriter and has produced yet another enigmatic, rich and fascinating record that refuses to bend over and beg for fucks from the radio juggernauts.

Rating: 9/10
Highlights: Skin, Vessel, In Your Nature, Hikikomori, Lick The Palm Of The Burning Handshake, Collapse
Avoid: n/a

Artwork Watch: The dangers of suffocation are rarely forewarned by today's musicians so well done to her for taking the initiative.

Coldplay - Mylo Xyloto

2011-10-29T02:51:00.008+01:00

Confessing that you're a Coldplay fan has been risky territory for a good 5 years or so now. Only the hardcore haters would fail to appreciate their earlier records - A Rush of Blood to the Head in particular remains one of my favourite albums of all time. Whether it's the Radiohead derivatives, the miserable soft-rock and the ensuing TV montage spots or just a plain old dislike for Chris Martin, it seems that, whilst the sales and audiences are getting bigger, so are the cynics. Up until 2011 the band had never yet disappointed me - even last year's Christmas Lights charmed the socks off me - but 'Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall' should've been a warning sign.

Yes, it seems noone is safe from the eurodance trend. The fact that its tune was just so uneventful, in addition to being identical to a dodgy 80s Simon Cowell production, led to a horrifying thought: maybe the critics were right. Nonetheless, album tracks have always been highlights for me throughout their career, so let's press on.

With a self-titled intro full of romantic keys and their token distant-epic atmospherics, the band launch into 'Hurts Like Heaven', a rapidfire rebellion that boasts "Tonight the streets are ours/ And we’re writing and saying/ Don't let them take control". Melodically sound, the band are able to notch up another sure stadium-rock favourite here. Second single 'Paradise' again initially worried me with its all style, no substance knacks and tricks that the band have been so eager to employ since the worldwide success of Viva la Vida - but the key difference here is that the songwriting has taken a massive tumble. Gone are the wartime epics and the French revolution; in their place? Romantic clichés.

They try to revive a little of Life in Technicolor (II of which was fucking fantastic, by the by) on 'Charlie Brown', vowing "We’ll run riot, we’ll be glowing in the dark" in amongst some rather unremarkable Coldplay hubbub. Yes, this one's for the yoof. You can count up the lyrical clichés on 'Us Against the World', but melodically and sonically it's just refreshing to see an acoustic Coldplay again. It might not be the strongest of their tunes but I approve of their self-rediscovery. 'M.M.I.X.' throws a couple of little extra-terrestrial sounds into the mix before the big stomping monolith that is 'Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall'. Sure, it's catchy. But it's a huge step down again in terms of songwriting.

Not all diversions from their stereotypical sounds are euphoric-pop, though; 'Major Minus' projects them into 90s U2-pastiches (complete with blustering Edge riffs) - otherwise the track again just sadly meanders uneventfully. 'U.F.O.' then gets across another nice little acoustic ditty that sounds irrelevant when compared to 'Princess of China'. Featuring the little-known Rihanna, it's understandably bombastic and the band staggeringly pull it off - a growling synth hook does well to set their sights high, and of course Rihanna's vocals propel it into future chart kingdoms with aplomb. 'Up In Flames' gently pulls in the reigns with a cute piano tune and poignant tune.

A daft little samba is then seen in 'A Hopeful Transmission', a title so ridiculously saccharine that you have to wonder if they're asking for a slap. They then throw every single crescendo into 'Don't Let It Break Your Heart', which carries all the subtlety of a Glee Spice Girls medley. 'Up With the Birds' continues and bows the band out with a similar full-frontal optimism. You could put any kind of spin on the record; that it's a ray of sunshine in a very bleak climate, that it's a band reaching out and exploring themselves, or that it's one for the kids.

It's just a little soul-destroying that the band you've spent so long defending from snobs and idiots go and produce an album where the highlights sound more like Taio Cruz's 'Dynamite' (Every Teardrop...) than 'The Scientist' or 'In My Place'. You can't fault their ambition, but Mylo Xyloto at times feels like it's aiming for the stars with a rocket made out of cardboard.

Rating: 6.5/10
Highlights: Hurts Like Heaven, Princess of China, Us Against the World, Up In Flames
Avoid: Major Minus, Every Teardrop Is A Waterfall, Charlie Brown

Artwork Watch: An eye-catching but clumsy attempt at trying to ensnare the kids by an incredibly privileged band. Like hearing your dad say "yo".

Björk - Biophilia

2011-10-27T15:06:00.005+01:00

To review this fully one would have to immerse themselves in not only the already pretty kooky world that is Björk's discography, but the heightened multimedia experience that she's chosen to indulge us with - applications, taglines and her token innovative instrumentations have made this already an incredibly complicated work of art to gauge. A huge fan of her earlier records - Post and Homogenic in particular - I was first introduced to her through the crazy dancing and Aboriginal anti-humanism of Volta's 'Earth Intruders' (ignoring, of course, the obvious hit 'It's Oh So Quiet'). It appears in retrospect the world remains divided on Volta's gamechanging, but for me it was the first moment where I opened myself to music that was neither pop nor chart-rock. 'Declare Independence' particularly shook my perception of music and its power.

None have been as scientifically orchestrated as Biophilia, though, surely. Each track has a backstory, a correlation between the instrumentation and a piece of natural phenomena that all builds to... well to what exactly? Even in a world where Brian Cox is embraced by all, artistry is rarely approached in a formulaic manner. I'm slightly bewildered, but then most of the star's onlookers are perpetually so.

We begin with a harp-loop that sublimely backs Björk's lyrical themes of rebirth and experiencing the worst to start afresh - 'Moon' quietly muses "As if the healthiest past-time is being in life-threatening circumstances", immediately refreshing Björk's sense of vitality. Few would have expected a tesla coil to be employed - but 'Thunderbolt' does just that, constantly at risk of launching into a ferocious storm, but sadly the "miracles" she "craves" are spared from a track that wouldn't sound too out of place on a SNES horror video game. First single 'Crystalline' then quickly makes up for any musical plunders with a fierce hook and breakdown that is quite at odds with the structural and organic themes behind the lyrics.

'Cosmogony' is described as an embodiment of the philosophical idea musica universalis, the idea that the entire universe is in harmony with itself, and that the smallest drops at one corner can resonate everywhere. A sombre choir here and a distant horn there give it a suitably atmospheric bliss, and it serves as the album's adhesive. 'Dark Matter' is a slight disappointment and thematic oddball (we're simply given the explanation of 'musical scales') that lingers a little too long for even the shortest track of the record. Similarly, 'Hollow' is more suggestive than evocative, but manages to thrust ominosity at you with its unusual rhythms and gothic strings.

There's simplicity though behind tracks like 'Virus' that make the whole record a little less challenging to access, and it's immediately gratifying. Environmentalism and organicism are again touched upon in 'Sacrifice': "Initiate a touch before it's too late, Say the words to her that will make her shine" is implored. The music lilts uneasily between frenetic dubstep and minimalist echoes - similarly on the phenomenal 'Mutual Core' with its blisteringly exciting crescendos that fuse beautifully inbetween some haunting verses. Final track 'Solstice' muses over delicate harp-notes "you, yourself, you are a light-bearer, a light-bearer receiving radiance from others".

She continues to fascinate, she continues to bewilder and she continues to innovate. There are, sadly, few moments of musical excellence and the songs do feel like blueprints for much grander realisations of themselves, but the sheer magnanimity of the conceptualisation and its execution does not deserve just a fleeting glimpse. To look at music through Björk's eyes is to look at the world, and even beyond, and it's a gift that few musicians are willing to, or able to, adventure. Whether you greet this as an unfair advantage, or maybe even a little bit smoke-and-mirrors, is up to you, but to go through music looking for the next tune to hum... well you might as well work at Heart FM.

Rating: 8/10
Highlights: Cosmogony, Mutual Core, Virus, Hollow, Crystalline
Avoid: n/a

Artwork Watch: Stellar, if you'll forgive the pun.

Grouplove - Never Trust A Happy Song

2011-10-21T15:33:00.006+01:00

Things have finally come full circle for this little old blog of mine. Back in March I posted here a little bit of giddy praise for an EP that had come out last year, spawning several of my favourite playlist inclusions this year (particularly 'Don't Say Oh Well'). But enough ego boosting, I have a band to rave about. Hopefully. Borrowing just the two of their EP tracks for this, their debut LP, Grouplove have set out to inject buoyancy and vitality into a predominantly sour-faced indie scene.

The album begins with clapping and twee basslines on 'Itchin' on a Photograph', a brash and blustery vocal assault that teeters uncertainly between youthful and irritating thanks to Christian Zucconi's nasal delivery, but is backed promisingly by a gripping chorus and climactic instrumentals. Any uncertainty about their poppy sounds are washed away though in 'Tongue Tied', a sugary-sweet anthem that exclaims "don't wave no goodbye!" with raw energy. They tentatively reverse into a more restrained environment on 'Lovely Cup', though retaining their knack for hooks and sublime choruses.

'Colours' was available on their self-titled EP and as such isn't anything new to me, but is apparently set to be featured on the new FIFA soundtrack (if that's out yet or not is beyond me. I gave up video games years ago). The outfit then try their hand at pathos on 'Slow', an electronic indulgence of exaggerated guitar solos and rasping vocals from Hannah Hooper, that's quite a pleasant surprise. The band then use up another EP track, 'Naked Kids', an immediately predictable but nice detour through some Juno soundtrack derivatives.

They certainly emulate a wide variety of contemporary alternative-pop acts; there's an air of Dog Days Are Over behind 'Spun', before a shouting-folk chorus kicks in to add yet another catchy tune to their already long list. There's then an air of a Eurovision ballad about 'Betty's Bomb Shell', with its "it's a sunny day, we will go away on a holiday" lyrics and ever-optimistic instrumentals. The Fratellis are then mimicked on 'Chloe' with its staccato riffs and pub-rock chants throughout, but the track suffers from a lack of individuality.

The band also aim for stadium heights with the Edge-tinged riffs of 'Love Will Save Your Soul', an attempt at trying to drown out all sorrows that fails on account of its own sickliness. I'm partial to a lot of happy-pop, but at times the band seem to be confusing themselves with the cast of Glee. They thankfully pull in the reins for 'Cruel and Beautiful World', a folk-pop ballad that gently asserts "there's a song inside this heart of mine" (say cheese). To finish, 'Close Your Eyes And Count to Ten' literally howls their way out of the room with triumph, fusing 90s Britpop sounds with 60s romantic balladry.

Whether it's because I have Freshers' flu or it's because I'm a little bit skint, there's something a little grating about the optimism and excitement behind Grouplove's debut record - because usually I'd lap it up. They've undeniably got a talent for a catchy tune, but at times this verges on the Mika levels of insanity. But for a debut record there's consistency and a bundle of memorable tunes, so job well done.

Rating: 7/10
Highlights: Spun, Colours, Slow, Cruel and Beautiful World, Tongue Tied, Lovely Cup
Avoid: Chloe, Love Will Save Your Soul

Artwork Watch: It's a bit 'The Pains of Being Pure at Heart' isn't it?
For fans of: Alphabeat, Noah and the Whale, Scissor Sisters

Ed Sheeran - +

2011-10-20T16:05:00.005+01:00

Whatever was left for me to wax lyrical about Sheeran has already been done so to death by the radio personality-vacuums of Fearne Cotton, Jo Whiley and co. The UK has been gripped by a plague of mediocre genre-mashing and it doesn't seem to show any signs of imminent release. As Facebook spawns seventy hundred groups about how cool/fit/peng (delete where appropriate) gingers suddenly are now thanks to him and Rupert Grint (both of which I struggle to understand; the latter of which happens to pop up in Sheeran's latest music video), I'll just dive in to what I know will be a very tedious 50 minutes.

Beginning with early 2011's radio surprise-hit, 'The A Team', Sheeran strums along rather inoffensively and it's fair to say it deserved to be a hit in the same way that James Morrison, Jason Mraz and the Plain White Ts deserved their minor successes. It's also fair to point out that few mainstream sensations have the freedom to sing about heroin addiction and prostitution, but for me this is nothing more than a pleasant distraction. A light drumbeat accompanies 'Drunk', a fairly standard tune that might accentuate a Bruno Mars album. Again the lyrics turn to taboo topics, in a no-way-contrived attempt to endear oneself to the indie scene.

As far as opening lyrics go, "I found your hairband on my bedroom floor" is a real stinker. The rest of 'U.N.I.' is a quickly-delivered midtempo ballad, thankfully detailing "You 'n' I" and not a wild anecdote about university. The fusing though, of soft-rock and hip hop lyrics is a difficult one because only the superfans are going to have the patience and tenacity to try and decipher his flows, which really seem only included because a) noone has done it before or b) to distract from an average voice and boring melody. "This drink is a liver killer" is one of many adlibs available on 'Grade 8', another below-average track centred around a heart-strings/instrumentalist metaphor that's just sooooo clever.

Call me old-fashioned but it's the stripped-back nature of tracks like 'Wake Me Up' that appeals to me most - even if the lyrics swiftly flicker between tenuous and nauseating ("I've always been shit at computer games" / the entire beach-pebble-necklace verse). Vocally and melodically though it's pretty lovely. Similarly, 'Small Bump' floats along enjoyably and inevitably charms the knickers off many an impressionable and musically-ignorant teenager. Sadly though, Sheeran fully stumbles into 'boring' territory by 'This', a bubbling and painfully-slow ballad that's all breathiness and sighs. (I say) Thankfully (but I don't really mean it) the tempo is increased for 'The City', with all the edgy-cool beats of...uh... a Craig David track. Pianos and choirs in the background give it a nice sound, though, and it's a sweet 'Hometown Glory'-style testament to urban life.

Third single 'Lego House' (the one with the Weasley in the video) is begging for a subtle-as-a-brick Katy Brand parody with its wide-eyed child lyrics and tune that's been done 20,000 times before. ZZZZZ. As a university fresher the omnipresence (thanks mainly to my flatmate) of 'You Need Me, I Don't Need You' has been an overwhelming burden - though in fairness it's a welcome change of scenery from all of the previous "love love plod plod"s. That's not to forgive its immediately-obvious corny rhymes and naïve boasts about his authenticity and future, though. Producer Julie Frost, who's enjoying a string of hits lately with Beyoncé's 'Countdown' and the Black Eyed Peas' 'Just Can't Get Enough', lends her hand to 'Kiss Me', a ballad led by a slow, thudding drum and backed by contemplative strings. Lovely.

The final track (or two, counting the hidden), 'Give Me Love', again simmers satisfyingly and with a resounding chorus - easily the strongest on the album. Sheeran then covers the traditional Irish farewell, 'The Parting Glass', with minimal stirring moments.

Many long-time fans have pointed out that the forces that be in the music production world have polished off some of his more appealing edges, and that definitely seems to be a possibility here. If that means missing out on more saccharine-sweet drug addicts and their ~problems~ then I'm not entirely mourning the loss. There've been countless instances where the young and the authentic have been tricked into looping their own niches around their own necks, and eventually you find the contradictions suffocating them - he boasts about he didn't go to the BRIT School, but then emulates their lovepop graduates with worrying aplomb. Here's to the next, probably worse, sensation to replace him.

Rating: 3/10
Highlights: Give Me Love, The A Team, Kiss Me, Wake Me Up, The City
Avoid: This, You Need Me, I Don't Need You, Grade 8, U.N.I., Lego House

Artwork Watch: HE IS GINGER AND EDGY, PEOPLE, GO FUCKING MENTAL.
For fans of: Colostomy bags, Readers' Digest, hearing aids and dead pigeons.

Nicola Roberts - Cinderella's Eyes

2011-10-14T17:12:00.004+01:00

A credible member of Girls Aloud. Gosh. The thought of it sends shivers down my spine. Whilst two have already gone it alone to polarising degrees of success, neither really shook the musical press up beyond the occasional tabloid spat. Yet with production from the very-credible-indeed sorts of Metronomy and Diplo, Roberts has finally served up a worthy retort to all of the pundits that've been tearing into Girls Aloud since their inception (although why a group who've released Biology, The Loving Kind or The Show would need defending is, quite frankly, beyond me).

Beginning then with the Diplo-produced lead single 'Beat of My Drum', Cinderella's Eyes bursts onto the scene with an insanely-catchy chorus that at first irritates but then enraptures; a typically Major Lazer instrumental thuds and skids with about as much precision and sense as the lyrics, but I can't help but like it. 'Lucky Day' sees cowriting from the ever-underrated Dragonette, and is easily the album's highlight. Roberts' vocals howl and sigh with genuine suggestion, and the production values are untouchable."I want something more!" is cried with minimal diva tantrums.

The record sadly takes a bit of a stumble after the initial wave of singles. 'Yo-Yo' is a modest, sugary ballad that talks big ("All the other girls, they say you're full of it and talking shit") but is more Jessie J than M.I.A. (in my universe this is an insult. Keep up.) whilst the tune is never more than affable. The title track offers a shadow of Cheryl Cole nonsense-pop with a delicate brushing of fairytale romance lyrics, with a decent-enough 80s throwback tune throughout. The absurd twinkles and assertions of her own fragility begin to wear thin though - 'Porcelain Heart' may have a decent chorus but almost drowns in its own melodrama. 'I', the first of two Metronomy inclusions, is certainly interesting but there's a sense that the backing and Roberts just don't mesh well.

The shrillness finally subsides in 'Everybody's Got To Learn Sometime', a sweet electronic-ballad that's a lot easier to swallow. The Invisible Men, the aptly-titled production team behind an impressively vast collection of recent British pop, lend their hand to 'Say It Out Loud', a sure future gay anthem if ever there needed to be one. The unconvincing theatrics return in 'Gladiator' with a rather obvious metaphor, but are spared humiliation by an able instrumental. The same cannot be said for the bewildering 'Fish Out of Water', Metronomy's second offering. Either creatively spent from the excellent 'The English Riviera' earlier this year or just woefully misfiring, it's quite a good interpretation of drowning in a puddle.

The final end of the record prove its saving grace, however. "I wanna blow up, I'm gonna blow up!" she warns on 'Take A Bite', a joyful imitation of the likes of Lily Allen and M.I.A., that certainly only Roberts seems to show any signs of nailing (from the fivesome anyway) - indeed towards the end the middle finger to her sceptics (because solo females addressing their haters is still necessary):

Called me a rude ginger b*tch and say I bought bigger tits
They're gonna eat all their words, they're talking absolute shit

does well to colour in some personality that might've been masqueraded beforehand. We then close with the beautiful 'Sticks + Stones', subtly addressing her fragility and baffling us with the possibility that anyone could feasibly call her ugly.

So she's pinned down the tunes, has marketed herself with a distinctive image and has the underdog potential about her - all the ingredients for a successful breakthrough, right? As a debut though the record suffers at times from its own theatricality; those looking for a revelatory or personal album will probably walk away disappointed.

Rating: 7.5/10
Highlights: Lucky Day, Sticks + Stones, Everybody's Got To Learn Sometime, Say It Out Loud, Take A Bite
Avoid: I, Fish Out of Water

Artwork Watch: It has a feather duster, which is an immediate bonus, but ultimately the thought behind this was "Oi! Nicola! You're pretty, right? Stand in front of some ugly shit." How outré
For fans of: Lily Allen, Kate Nash, VV Brown

Kasabian - Velociraptor!

2011-09-16T14:04:00.005+01:00

Whilst the rest of the world gets excited by Coldplay and the Kings of Leon's spectacular meltdown, it's quite easy to forget about the likes of Kasabian - and that's a frightening prospect given how consistently great they've been. It's still something of a mystery to me that none of their records have propelled them into international stardom, and yet the gloriously average Viva la Vida did. Ho-hum. The British music press have been far kinder to the band though; Q and NME regularly devote entire front-covers to Pizzorno, Meighan and co., cementing their position as one of the UK's most exciting and enduring prospects.

Album #4, Velociraptor!, would seem, if not from the title then its cover, to be something of a wildfire. Not that 'West Ryder Pauper Lunatic Asylum' was an entirely modest title. Opening as it does, with 'Let's Roll Just Like We Used To', we find the band heralding their entry with a deeply retro swagger. The attention to detail screams Wall of Sound, whilst the chorus just screams. "They're at it again!" is crowed with no sense of irony or self-doubt, and it's utterly convincing. First single 'Days Are Forgotten' harks back to the band's debut with an almost daft vocal hook and deliciously blunt riffs, that breathed fresh life into the UK indie scene just seven years ago and will hopefully do so again.

Before one scribbles this down as a rehash of their former glory, 'Goodbye Kiss' interrupts the nostalgia for some (to my knowledge) yet unseen rock-and-roll balladry from the Leicester outfit. Even without a sultry Diana Ross or Martha Reeves, it sways sweetly. For 'La Fée Verte' the band turn up the psychedelia - "I see Lucy in the sky telling me I'm high" - for a slightly confusing narcotic anecdote (assuming the green fairy, of the title, wasn't as accustomed with pot as she was with absinthe) that nonetheless does well to evoke its inspired sounds (late Beatles, basically). The title track then reasserts their energetic abilities and if you're willing to take music not so seriously (here's looking at you, the Guardian) it's extremely satisfying.

Things do verge on the Bond-theme levels of pomp on occasion, though: the intro to 'Acid Turkish Bath (Shelter From The Storm)' is a little unnecessary given its sudden descent into flamenco-tinged carelessness afterwards. The strings continue to dazzle throughout, but feel more jazz-hands than exciting. The tone is yet again changed in 'I Hear Voices', a slight TRON soundtrack of an inclusion, which is a personal highlight (although by now one should bear in mind this record is very much a chocolate variety box). 'Re-wired' sees the band tying in this new electronic ("make you feel electric") sound with their typecasts - something accomplished easily with the tune.

'Man of Simple Pleasures' serves well as the album's (and perhaps the band's) manifesto - explaining their efforts to strive towards experimentation, all the while rejoicing in their influences ("I see your future, leave me alone in the past") and their love of music. Because whilst they do indeed take steps to keep things fresh, as evidenced by the synth on 'Switchblade Smiles', it's the reverence to their, and musical, past that reaffirms them. The drums on this particular track aren't necessarily original, nor are the hazy vocals, but nod graciously to influences (Led Zeppelin here). They save the greatest surprise for closing track 'Neon Noon', though. Much less bombastic, it serves as a blissful ending.

Of course now that Oasis are engaged in a fit of tabloid snipes amongst each other there was a gap in the market waiting for an ambitious enough stalwart. With The Vaccines remaining too anonymous, Viva Brother too ridiculous and The View too Scottish, Kasabian were never less than the prime candidates, especially with the plentiful tunes here and their knack for songwriting that most have lost by album #4. You'd be pushed to find a theme or a concept here, but I'm not entirely sure you'd look to them for one anyway.

Rating: 8.5/10
Highlights: I Hear Voices, Let's Roll Like We Used To, Velociraptor!, Re-wired, Neon Noon
Avoid: n/a

Artwork Watch: It's a bit of a fucking mess in all honesty.

The Kooks - Junk of the Heart

2011-09-13T09:42:00.004+01:00

"Let's get this one out of the way", I sighed, as I opened the tab and begun this review. The Kooks have got a lot of flak over the years for "sound[ing] like they're rolling over and begging Radio 1 to fuck them" (Johnny Borrell), and to be fair they've never really been anything above foot-tappingly pleasant to me. Though I can't help but feel aggrieved by the amount of hate they get - an amount only really worthy of bestowing upon Scouting For Girls - when they've coined some rather great songs (She Moves In Her Own Way, Naïve, Always Where I Need to Be). So perhaps it's because I have a long queue of comparatively more interesting artists to review that I greet this, their third LP, with little more than fatigue.

It certainly begins as all of their material tends to: 'Junk of the Heart (Happy)' is a bright and romantic burst of pop-rock that warms the cockles somewhat, but is far from their catchiest efforts. They meander through the album with repetitive choruses ('How'd You Like That'), clap-along rhythms ('Rosie') and inoffensive rhymes ("I run awaaaaay with my imaginaaaaation", 'Taking Pictures of You').

But even in the moments where they dare to shock - with the song title 'Fuck the World Off' - they come off as underwhelming. I'm also fairly sure that "Let me fuck the world off for you" isn't a romantic gesture, and perhaps not even a coherent one. A brief shimmer of strings and other-worldly bliss is seen then in 'Time Above the Earth' which is too vague and fleeting to really strike anything beautiful across, but shows potential. There then comes a slight genre-fusion in 'Runaway', blending Britpop conventions with a modern drum structure - and it's far and away the most interesting track on display.

Single 'Is It Me' returns the band to their safe territory though, almost sounding like a parody of themselves, but retaining their ability to bash out a good tune. If you were ever wondering what Nirvana might sound like if covered by Toto then 'Killing Me' gives perhaps the closest idea to that we'll ever see - an unusual but somehow fascinating blend of 80s alternative-pop synths and indie strums. Sadly though the band fail to resist treading the same lines; 'Petulia' is a folksy breeze that neither chills nor warms, instead fails to make an impact.

There's also the nagging feeling that the cheery nature of 'Eskimo Kiss' is quite dated, sounding like a very late entry to the Gavin and Stacey soundtrack. That's not to say the track isn't lovely and chirpy, but it just doesn't feel relevant any more. Whether that's a good or bad thing I'm unsure, given "relevant" nowadays means either eurodance or dubstep, but the track serves as a handicap for the band and their failure to develop musically. Closer 'Mr. Nice Guy' is small evidence of the contrary, however, with a distortion-heavy stomper that pushes the band to their feasible limit.

All in all: well this was lovely, let's do this again some time. *instantly forgets you*

Rating: 6/10
Highlights: Killing Me, Runaway, Rosie, Junk of the Heart, Is It Me, Mr. Nice Guy
Avoid: Fuck the World Off, Petulia

Artwork Watch: Well that's... I love the way... and it's fascinating how... no I've no idea wtf this all about.

The Drums - Portamento

2011-09-10T14:16:00.004+01:00

Quite why I spent a near full price on their debut, given my typical shopping habits of even my most enduring idols (the majority of my Bowie collection are second-hand Amazon jobs), is beyond me. There was something about 2009 where my musical outlook was widening in ways that haven't before or since been replicated - and I guess I just had some spare cash that weekend. Because The Drums are hardly an act to get excited by, and as Portamento proves, they're a little bit of a one-trick pony too.

There was something charming about hearing all of these Beach Boys-cum-Joy Division anthems but strip away the lyrics and The Drums was essentially a very samey album. You could argue this against a number of bands I'm fond of - Vampire Weekend and Joy Division in particular - but their knack for tunes and atmospherics really washed away any such complaints for me. With Portamento I'm left a little uninspired.

Opening with 'Book of Revelations', they quickly tap into nihilist and atheist drones ("I believe that when we die we die") but with a signature canny tune - easily one of the album's strongest. 'Days' passes by with little irritation too, slowly bobbing in a sea of 80s romanticism and falsettos. The pace then picks up with 'What You Were', where background saxophones and a persistent echo vary things up admirably. There are times when it feels like a mashup, though; the juxtaposition of moody basslines against 80s power-pop stalwarts (the saxophone, the background coos) is unusual to say the least.

However by the time first single 'Money' begins I'm practically begging for a different rhythm structure. It's a relatively obvious choice for first single given how indifferent to change and experimentation it is, and as a fan of the debut album it was a nice reminder that they're still going - but nothing more. Like bumping into a cousin in town. There's another nice tune in 'Hard to Love', our first variation from the norm with a synthetic guitar loop standing in for their Peter Hook tribute act. The pouting is certainly convincing but other reviewers' attempts to liken them to the Smiths are laughable when faced with lyrics like "Tell me why/ when you look me in the eye/ do I feel like I want to die?"

Quite where you logically follow "you're hard to love" with 'I Don't Know How To Love' is lost on me, but I suspect the focus here was on vocal trickery and an eagerness to roll out the hooks. Not very strong ones either. A surprising turn to 90s dancehall pop is then seen in 'Searching For Heaven', where singer Pierce channels a little chunk of Matt Bellamy (although that might be the stellar instrumental backgrounds tampering with my judgment). It all crashes back to Earth disappointingly though with 'Please Don't Leave', which by now has all the emotional whining of a vomiting toddler. There are noble attempts to mysticise their sound on 'If He Likes It Let Him Do It' - "now it's winter-time and you're cold" never really captures me though.

The final three tracks are more of the same formula. Bop bop whine whine. None come more nauseatingly self-pitying though than 'In the Cold', which is almost laughably indulgent.

Just download Unknown Pleasures.

Rating: 4/10
Highlights: Book of Revelations, Searching For Heaven, Hard to Love, What You Were
Avoid: In The Cold, I Don't Know How to Love, Please Don't Leave, I Need A Doctor

Artwork Watch: The only really interesting thing about this record. Not that it means fuck all, anyway.

Example - Playing in the Shadows

2011-09-09T02:57:00.005+01:00

There's a sneaky suspicion that Example is not a musician I should enjoy. Given the influences and peers with which he's often associated - in a year that saw the emergence of Professor Green and Wretch 32 amongst others - I should recoil in horror. Yet I don't know if it's the poppy accessibility about his debut, or the helpful addition of being involved in a feud with the eternal cunt Cher Lloyd, but I'd actually consider myself a fan, especially after the excellent breakthrough Watch the Sun Come Up. In addition to great singles like Kickstars and Won't Go Quietly I enjoyed Sick Note (and that's with a No Doubt sample) and Hooligans amongst others.

Whilst the first two singles, both of which have topped the UK charts, would give some signs of minimal change in sound and genre by Gleave, Playing in the Shadows eventually explores some quite varied subgenres all under the electronic umbrella. Of course, it's all held together by your signature Example wordplay and dance-pop conventions. Opener 'Skies Don't Lie' has references from Nick Cave to Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde - quipping "I'm unorthodox so go call the cops, I ate all your crops" in amongst other unusual misnomers and misfires. The instrumental is fairly orthodox though, all eerie gospel-synths patiently building towards a Justice-bred breakdown.

And they don't come more safe than single 'Stay Awake' with its earnest anti-drugs, anti-clubbing message that seems a little unusual given the musical genre through which it's purveyed. I suppose you could put this down to an attempt to cover all his bases, but unless it's all tongue-in-cheek you can't be on both sides of club culture. Lead single 'Changed the Way You Kiss Me' however ditches all political stances in favour of a safe and stomping love-in-this-club belter. It's hummable and rather good, yes. From hereon though the music becomes more explorative - 'The Way' has a distinctly 80s europop tune and places Example in contemplative mood, seeking guidance from...anyone really. The darkness remains lurking in 'Natural Disaster', where the title laments what should be: "We should be happy ever after, happiness and laughter". Not quite a tsunami but we'll forgive him this one, since the backing is again solid and infectious.

Unfortunately there are times where Example slips into lazy habits and things go awry; 'Never Had A Day' thrives off a highly predictable tune (that sounds a little bit like Ian Van Dahl's Castles in the Sky to me) for a bit of sunkissed romantic reverie. Pianos interrupt all the hubbub though for 'Microphone', a poignant and reflective track that's as lovely as it is surprising. The record's title track wafts in an arabesque guitar hook that's constantly simmering above a threatening dubstep distortion (that of course surfaces in the final third of the track). One of the strongest dance hooks though is found on 'Midnight Run', so I'm a little confused by its lack of single promotion duties.

The drug usage metaphors return on 'Under the Influence', where said narcotic is (predictably) a special lady. One of the heaviest tracks on offer it flicks almost schizophrenic between ambient romance and frenetic breakdowns - and it's a mix that doesn't quite work. The less-than-poetic verses to 'Wrong in the Head' again, sadly, feel more like the hangover experience than a party anthem. There then comes the decision to end on something of a ballad; 'Anything' touches upon some of Gleave's earlier work (notably the excellent Watch the Sun Come Up) and the album is saved from fizzling out.

I never really know where to place Example as a lyricist. Hip hop snobs would disregard him immediately as a pop-singer with a few obvious quips to hand, and yet I'd be even harsher. Some of the rhymes he opts for are painfully embarrassing at best, yet I can't help but admire him for trying to swerve away from your generic "in the club, sipping gin, yeah, work that girl" safety nets. Musically there's nothing too challenging here for Gleave, and he's certainly carved out a niche for himself, but ignoring all of the commercial success is there anything exceptional here? No. Much like 21st century pop in general, this album is unsuccessful in its explorations and innovation, and settles for mediocrity.

Rating: 5.5/10
Highlights: Anything, Microphone, Changed the Way You Kiss Me, The Way, Midnight Run
Avoid: Never Had A Day, Wrong in the Head, Under the Influence

Artwork Watch: Oh please.

Thundercat - The Golden Age Of Apocalypse

2011-09-08T03:15:00.004+01:00

Such is the strange commanding power of social networking that I found myself in the position where, upon recommendation by Janelle Monáe via Twitter, I was downloading an album by someone I'd never even heard of before. I figured that if it possessed even an iota of the cross-genre experimentation and funk of Monáe's debut album last year, I'd be in for a good record, and I wasn't wrong. Their back stories are similarly unusual too - where Monáe went for a futuristic android sent through time to overcome racial prejudice, Thundercat himself has gone from punk rock to electro-jazz. Not quite so imaginative maybe but quite an unusual change of scenery.

There is one thing holding me back from loving this record and that's a widespread lack of vocals. I know instrumentals are more experimental and psychedelic without some dude telling you how beautiful this girl is, but there are inclusions of backing vocals that almost make this feel like a karaoke record at times. Do those exist? I wonder.

The first track demonstrates this (ignoring the introduction of 'Hooooooo!', sampling the theme tune for the legendary TV show); on 'Daylight' centre stage is given to a rainbow crest of alternating synths and electronic horns that, with the addition of some twinkles and the Isley Brothers-esque "open your mind!" smoothness, blends into a very palatable and chilled track that's both retrospective and imaginative. On 'Fleer Ultra' the guitars come into play and the track begins to take the record in a direction that I'd imagine Stevie Wonder would if he had debuted today. Late 80s chillwave synths subtly ebb in the background giving it a really timeless feel. Some vocals make it through on 'Is It Love?' but they seem distant; again the main focus being the bass (which really goes mental towards the end in spectacular fashion) and a saxophone solo that adds to the jazziness (is that a word?) that makes this record so exciting.

On the other hand Stephen Bruner (I probably should've introduced his real name at the start) is able to craft little pop songs that chip away at your subconscious with sweet harmonies and serene little nuggets of music - and 'For Love I Come' is the perfect example of that. At times reminiscent of Earth, Wind & Fire, it's the perfect end-of-summer chill. Everything down to the little synth-warps feels crafted as though by a pharmaceutical company with the perfect hallucinogenic. The unadulterated funk returns on 'It Really Doesn't Matter To You' though, which boasts some nice percussions. I guess you could say I'm more enticed by the nostalgic elements of the record, where the disco and the funk takes hold, because on probably the most electronic track, 'Jamboree', I'm not having so much fun. It squelches and beeps away nicely and it's by no means bad, and in fact it ties in nicely with this kind of cross-generational feel of the album, but it probably grabs me the least.

It picks up towards the end though and carries a more exciting beat into 'Boat Cruise' which again blasts these summery synths into your face like a cool breeze. Strings in the background feel like a synthetic interpretation of classic Bond movie soundtracks and the accompanying visions of southern France or what have you. "Seasons blow away but the love is just the same" is the refrain for the short-lived 'Seasons', a bit of a wind-down from the euphoria with some hints of uncertainty and heartbreak on the horizon. Then, for me, 'Goldenboy' plods along with no real energy or excitement. Quieter and almost subdued, there are some nice riffs here and there but it feels like an intermission. Perhaps it's intended to be more contemplative, and perhaps might grow on me.

A poppier rhythm then kicks in for 'Walkin'' which again feels like the early 70s disco reverie of Boney M. (albeit much less camp, even the "la la la la"s aside) or Earth Wind & Fire. Perhaps the most challenging and unnerving track then comes in 'Mystery Machine (The Golden Age Of Apocalypse)' which, despite the first track, contains no other references to Scooby Doo... unless the slightly sinister riffs throughout are meant to make you squeal "jinkies". Finally on 'Return To The Journey' there's a much more 80s atmosphere with snares and dark basslines that evoke a little Ultravox. The soulful vocals remain though, and if anything the final track is a perfect example of the unusual, varied influences on display by Thundercat.

However there's something preventing me from rapidly falling in love with The Golden Age of Apocalypse and that's its sometimes unpredictable and unconventional nature. I appreciate that it's an incredibly wide-eyed and complex record but I think it could do with reigning in some of its eccentricities in place of more focussed songwriting. That said, I can see myself coming back to the record time and time again with something new to discover. It's one of those records that make you still excited, even as a classicist or nostalgic, by new music, and for that I can only commend it.

Rating: 8.5/10
Highlights: For Love I Come, Daylight, Walkin', Boat Cruise, Is It Love?
Avoid: Jamboree, Goldenboy (don't really need to be avoided, I've just painted myself into a corner here with my typical reviewing template and as such have put my two least favourites)

Artwork Watch Let's not turn this into a rate-TV show-logos blog. Pretty audacious though.
For fans of: Stevie Wonder (or rather, his Innervisions stuff), Janelle Monae, Earth, Wind & Fire, Herbie Hancock, Santana... there's something for everyone here.

Laura Marling - A Creature I Don't Know

2011-09-07T05:32:00.004+01:00

Whilst across the nation there was a collective shrug of confusion upon the announcement of Marling's victory in this year's BRIT Award for best British female category, in the Collins household (or, the only one of the household who watched it at least) there was much air-punching and whooping. For the academy to recognise Marling's genuine earthy talents ahead of the over-hyped (Rumer, Ellie Goulding) and untalented (Cheryl Cole) was a rewarding surprise for me and restored my faith a little bit in British music and its accolades.

Much like my last reviewed artist - Bombay Bicycle Club - Marling has been quick to put out three albums in just four years. Quite a gauntlet has therefore been thrown down ahead of her - since both I Speak Because I Can and Alas, I Cannot Swim were almost universally praised. How does she rise to the challenge? With a bold slice of saloon-bar reverie in the form of 'The Muse'. A rustic and unexpected burst of banjos and pianos undercuts the whole of her usual routine, and she sounds more mature, more Joni Mitchell. This vocal similarity continues into 'I Was Just A Card', which deceptively swells into something optimistic and beautiful, but is undermined by paranoid and regret: "Could've sworn I had that man when he took my hand".

The bluegrass disappears and we're left with something much more conventional in 'Don't Ask Me Why'. She croons and sighs with nerve-wracking opacity - her response to being lost? "But it's real". It's a brand of tireless optimism that's quite common in modern folk music - to which Marling finds herself connected not only musically but personally (with friends and exes in Mumford and Sons and Noah and the Whale). However there are strong classic influences too - on 'Salinas' she strikes home with heavy Bob Dylan themes thanks to the irregular rhyming structures and unusual lyrics ("I, who speak awkwardly/ Any word, if it is heard, is not intended to be").

Throughout the album it almost feels as though Marling is undressing - by track 5, 'The Beast', yet another layer of instrumentation and façades disappear - and like the ceaseless heterosexual I am I cannot help but find the bareness here more interesting. Darker and rawer than the others, she warns "I'm pulled by the rope/ I swing from the trees into the slope". Similarly, on 'Night After Night' she laments a difference of opinion and philosophy that led to a breakup: "I sold you my hand once and you hit me in fear". "I am full of guilt" she confesses on 'My Friends', which is something of a more intelligent bros-before-hoes argument. The guitars pluck along carelessly and comfortingly whilst Marling dismisses "a reminder of us".

On 'Rest In The Bed' Marling ponders pure bliss: "Know that it's you and I till the end/ And all I want from life is to hold your hand". If you're looking for the catchiest and most mesmerising track on the album then look no further than 'Sophia'. Led by timeless guitars and spurred along by choirs and bouncy rhythms, it's the climax of the album. Instead though she leaves the closing duties to 'All My Rage' which almost matches the epic scale of the predecessor. It almost feels at times that strings may be broken from the almost hymnal intensity.

The characters that Marling creates are doubtless intriguing and well-crafted but they often feel like a barrier between us and her real feelings. Since so many metaphors and allegories are thrown in with so many conflicting emotions the album certainly feels like an emotional experience but there's a nagging feeling that, even amongst all the hubbub, she's distracting us from herself. Which is why I have yet to particularly fall in love with this album as a whole - although the more likely tracks to be personal (such as The Beast, Night After Night and My Friends) are there to prove potential otherwise.

Rating: 8.5/10
Highlights: Night After Night, Sophia, The Beast, Don't Ask Me Why, My Friends
Avoid: n/a (though The Muse requires a little faith)

Artwork Watch: In an embrace with a creature but simultaneously pushing it away. How Kafka.

Bombay Bicycle Club - A Different Kind of Fix

2011-09-06T00:38:00.005+01:00

There was only one indie nightclub in my hometown and it recently closed down - but if I were to describe it the first thing that springs to mind is Bombay Bicycle Club and their hit Always Like This. Probably their most well-known single, it became almost anthemic and was played every single time I went there. I rather like it. That said, to narrow the band down to a song is not why I waste time writing these little things, so let's embrace album #3 (! already!)

The Crouch End foursome seem to be on one of the most drastic of upturns in recent years - their debut I Had the Blues but I Shook Them Loose, whilst containing their breakthrough hits, charted at a lowly #46. Today, they've sat 40 places higher. And when you consider that this record sits nicely inbetween the folksy loveliness of Mumford and Sons and the quiet indie serenities of The xx or Metronomy, it's not hard to see why.

Quite how they blend those sounds though takes a little more work than looking at who's popular in both scenes (curse my lazy journalism) - on opener 'How Can You Swallow So Much Sleep' the band partner a slow dubstep beat with some harmonising vocals and a simple acoustic guitar hook. The end result is a catchy, infectious tune that the band are in abundant supply of; they slip into 'Bad Timing' with a stranger, noisier presence to hammer in the more demanding lyrics: "Why do you keep me back?/ With all your powers I am pushing at". "Humour me just think it through, it's all I ever asked of you", Steadman continues on 'Your Eyes' with a sound much more similar to their debut - quick rhythms, staccato vocals - and it's another solid, albeit unremarkable track.

The poppier edges are catered to with the likes of 'Lights Out, Words Gone' (with its jangly riffs and chilled-out synths) and 'Take the Right One' (think Doves covered by Belle and Sebastian) - but most noticeably on single 'Shuffle' with its jerky, upbeat hook. I've only heard it 5 times now but I've already got a feeling it'll continue to be a favourite of this year for me. But before you go off thinking this is strictly indie-pop, 'Beggars' rudely interrupts you with a summery knees-up complete with tambourine and harmonies. Think Fleet Foxes without the extremely poetic lyricism. They then revert to the indie-pop, evoking a bit of Carpenters cool on 'Leave It'.

Whilst the genres and energies are bouncing around with careless abandon, lyrically they too suffer from bouts of schizophrenia: "It's not complex, see all of the signs flashing on/ You're just paying, for all of the bad you have done" they viciously sign-off the otherwise picturesque 'Fracture', but on 'What You Want' they practically beg: "You can rearrange me now. If we wait we can make it somehow/ Well what you want, what you want; anything you want". After the light indecision (sadly the most interesting thing to comment on for both average tracks) another delectable hook surfaces on 'Favourite Day' in amongst some chirpy and bouncy rhythms. Lovely stuff. The tides change again though in time for 'Still', in which a piano is left to its own melancholy devices, and the vocals lament and sob emotively. It's quite an intense experience, really.

Although the album chronologically throws you off course a little too often to ever really sit comfortably throughout, this is arguably the product of the Shuffle Age and therefore performs more than admirably as a colleciton of diverse, exciting and unusual tunes. It's worth pointing out though that, after the mess of a living-up-to-its-title Flaws, the band have managed to strike oil again and put out another solid, nice album.

Rating: 7.5/10
Highlights: Shuffle, Beggars, Still, Leave It, Your Eyes
Avoid: What You Want

Artwork Watch: To be honest I haven't got a fucking clue what's going on here. So I like it.

Red Hot Chili Peppers - I'm With You

2011-09-05T03:41:00.003+01:00

I'm going to keep this review short because I'm really struggling to find anything interesting or noteworthy in this album. Almost out of pure disappointment I just cannot muster enough energy to describe every detail of this...shell. You all know the backstory so I'll spare the "O John Frusciante, wherefore art thou?"s and the tabloid drugs stories.

The album begins with good intentions: the raw distortion and classic rock aesthetics of 'Monarchy of Roses' certainly sound exciting but they quickly subside to a disco-rock riff that never really goes anywhere. Kiedis' vocals are exactly the stereotype of a Kiedis vocal, and whilst the heavy riffs reappear sporadically throughout the track it all feels schizophrenic to me; they don't really blend well. But both of these alternating sounds are much more exciting than the disco-by-numbers 'Factory of Faith', which, whilst containing a rich bassline, actually irritates me.

Many though seem to be appreciating 'Brendan's Death Song' and I'm one of them. Admittedly midtempo it's an emotional, life-affirming ballad with simple but effective lyrics and a pretty lovely vocal. Aaaaw. But to follow this with 'Ethiopia' makes little sense to me. It's got an unusual rhythm, but I can't get past the whole spelling-out-the-title spiel. Annoying. It's frustrating because some of the basslines throughout are great in their minimalism, almost evoking Joy Division, and it's a nice reminder that at least Flea is trying. On 'Annie Wants A Baby' the drums stutter and the guitars ebb with an overwhelming tedium, whilst on 'Look Around' it's almost as if Kiedis has tried to blend all of his vocal styles into one unimaginative smoothie.

It's then cowbell 'o clock on the single 'The Adventures of Rain Dance Maggie' which initially struck me as lacklustre and still unfortunately does. Everything from the rooftop performance music video to the MOR riffs feel like they've been done a thousand times before, and that's just by the Peppers themselves. On the other hand, 'Did I Let You Know' has some great riffs and the chorus is as energetic and singalong as some of their classics, all accompanied by a bit of a samba-inspired rhythm and even some kettle drums here and there. Nice. By 'Goodbye Hooray' the initial fears of the album are almost quashed - in amongst all the hubbub and noise there's actually the blueprints to a more exciting Chilis.

Even though I'm struggling to name one of its prominent features, I'd name 'Happiness Loves Company' as one of my favourites from the album. It has a bit of a ragtime Bohemian feel about it thanks to a stomping drumbeat and wonky pianos. Well there's two prominent features, Shaun, don't be hard on yourself. In 'Police Station' the band pull out all of the dramatic stops, but lyrically it's... a bit shit. Not really sure why they needed to translate, but next is 'Even You Brutus?' which all sounds a bit... Kaiser Chiefs. Not good. 'Meet Me At The Corner' almost begs the meaning of life with its unadventurous monotony. The record at least closes with a bit of fun - 'Dance, Dance, Dance' is a pretty good motivation to do what the title asks of you, but again this isn't exactly spectacular.

Like I said - I find it impossible to get excited about this band any more. At least Stadium Arcadium had some excellent singles - but, and this is an all-too simplistic conclusion but one that needs to be made, without Frusciante the Chilis are suffering. This album is the sound of a band dying on its legs.

Rating: 4/10
Highlights: Did I Let You Know, Brendan's Death Song, Happiness Loves Company
Avoid: Factory of Faith, Meet Me At The Corner, The Adventures of Rain Dance Maggie, Ethiopia, Annie Wants A Baby, Even You Brutus?

Artwork Watch: It's designed by Damien Hirst, so I want to hate it. But it's rather eye-catching. Not a bloody clue what it means though. But then it's Hirst.

David Guetta - Nothing But the Beat

2011-09-04T04:51:00.005+01:00

When I wrote my review for LMFAO's album just a few weeks ago I'd imagined my musical torture for the year to be over, and that nothing could feasibly be worse. I underestimated myself and my hatred for a vast number of other musicians - a large proportion of which make an appearance on this, the Now! compilation of songs that inexplicably sound the same. Yet, despite possessing guest spots from will.i.am., Usher, Chris Brown, Jessie J, Taio Cruz, Ludacris, Akon, Timbaland AND Lil Wayne, I wouldn't quite totally write Nothing But the Beat off. Because - as much as I like to pretend I loathe everything about Mr. Guetta and his laughable habit of appearing in his own videos as if he's attractive or something - he HAS come up with some decent tunes (When Love Takes Over, Love Don't Let Me Go, One Love, Love Is Gone - these four shall henceforth be referred to as the Lovelies). Sadly his old go-to pals like Chris Willis have been exchanged for the famous and the feeble.

However, I would be foolish to look into this record for something with artistic merit. Well. Foolish or optimistic. Music is supposed to be an art form after all. Anyone still subscribe to that line of thought? Please? Alas, pop albums seem to be judged at arm's length nowadays. It's expected to see "3 or 4 singles and the rest is shit filler" according to everyone, but here... I'm not convinced the singles are any good either.

Let's start with #3 hit (in the UK), 'Where Them Girls At?', a visionary reinterpretation of the tune that propelled Guetta to stardom in 2008 (Sexy Bitch/Chick. I dare you to question their identical tune). Any brief signs of a prosperous career ahead for Nicki Minaj following some strong performances with Kanye West are thrown out of the window with her autotuned, gimmicky chunk of schizophrenia that - whilst shocking and entertaining on Monster - only adds to the frenetic and directionless eurodance. Flo-Rida is of course on hand to mull over the phenomenon that is "girls". Taio Cruz and Ludacris are on hand for 'Little Bad Girl', a lo-fi, bass-heavy thumper that is at least somewhat passable for Ludacris' verse and a Daft Punkish bridge towards the end. Nicki Minaj returns, but is unrecognisable on 'Turn Me On', a shrill effort that almost blows you away with its outlandish sexual desperation. Then comes the remix of Snoop Dogg's 'Wet' (or 'Sweat', in some vain attempt to censor and show modesty) - and again another tune (Felix's Don't You Want Me) is shamelessly pilfered for the forgetful masses. It's almost as if going out and getting trashy every weekend fucks up your mental capacity.

It's rare that you'll hear me compliment Usher but he really does save this album with 'Without You'. The tune is of course predictable and perhaps a nod to the U2 song of a similar name, but Usher's restrained and almost soulful vocal really is a breath of fresh air in amongst all the adrenaline-fuelled sex that built up to this. It's by no means brilliant, but bears the potential of being listenable. There then comes the obligatory Clocks (Coldplay) tune derivative on 'Nothing Really Matters', with will.i.am. Again, it feels a lot more manageable than the first three tracks, but the tune is so obvious and will.i.am's boasts and lyrical diarrhoea really sabotage any decency there might've been in the blueprints. 'I Can Only Imagine' has Chris Brown and Lil Wayne on it, doing their respective autotuned standards. "You’re a firework, better in the dark. So let's turn off the lights and give me that spark". Really. By now we've reverted to buzzing sounds and Pitbull territory - 'Crank It Up' with Akon is everything you'd expect it to be, which is to say, awful.

But the real cause for offence comes courtesy of Timbaland and Dev's 'I Just Wanna Fuck'. Even ignoring the horrific title, it's a bit like watching a schoolgirl grind in the lap of her headmaster. Everything from the ill-executed attempts at M.I.A.-style electronic bleeps to the cold, uncommanding and almost subliminal vocal delivery from both parties makes this utterly cringeworthy. There's then a total remake of Rihanna's 'Only Girl (in the World)' with Jennifer Hudson on 'Night Of Your Life'. Absolutely every section is a repeat. How the fuck are people not picking up on this? Light at the end of the tunnel now, Shaun. Hold on there. 'Repeat' with Jessie J is probably going to chart well because that soulless uninteresting bitch can apparently sit with a broken leg asking the crowd to sing her unoriginal and repetitive tunes for her and we all lap it up, so there's that for you. However, the unlikeliest and therefore best collaboration comes at the end - 'Titanium' with...erm...Sia. Yeah. I imagine this'll be a pretty fatal blow to her credibility but her husky voice finally brings a redeemable quality to this album, and one of its strongest hooks only helps to pin this as far-and-away the best track on show.

Adverts will tell you that this is the soundtrack to the parties of your dreams. Realistically, this is the soundtrack to crawling around a semen-stained sticky club carpet for 20p coins to scrape together and buy another Apple Sourz with.

Rating: 1/10
Highlights: Titanium, Without You, Little Bad Girl
Avoid: Sweat, I Just Wanna Fuck, Crank It Up, I Can Only Imagine, Nothing Really Matters

Artwork Watch: Does not compute.

Charlie Simpson - Young Pilgrim

2011-09-03T06:13:00.004+01:00

At the opposite side of the spectrum (following on from my introduction to the CSS review below), there are occasions where the elitist in me eagerly lines up into an already considerably long queue to take potshots at people with slightly embarrassing pasts. But whilst in that queue the bigger elitist in front of me turned around, slapped in the face and screeched to the rest of the queue "THIS FAGGOT HAS 4 BUSTED SONGS IN HIS LIBRARY". So I've come humbly back to passive aggression. After all, I'm reliably informed that those Fightstar albums were actually somewhat decent - but they lay a little too far along the XhardcoreX line of noise for me.

First things first - the album title and sleeve should be enough to tell you that this is a very serious chunk of folk-rock. But the first two singles from the record - which appear at the very start of it - would indicate otherwise. 'Parachute' in particular is an unabashed beeline for the teen girls looking for something in a post-Bruno Mars (debut) environment. It hammers home with a piano and cymbals, background cries included, with all the subtlety of a Gary Glitter karaoke night. 'Down Down Down' however begins the album well; albeit with some rather predictable attempts at authenticity (the falsetto harmonies, the guitar strings cracking). Yet neither are obvious enough to turn to parody; quite the opposite, the track carries a nice chorus and the strings slowly creeping in as it progresses are a nice inclusion. "The nights are so long without you" is hardly going to win an Ivor Novello, but the delivery and earnesty behind such lines are to be surprisingly commended.

I'm sure many reviews will have namedropped Mumford and Sons given the folk-pop nature of tracks like 'All At Once' and it's a fair observation. Touches of Coldplay too find their way into the surroundings (which is probably why NME describe this as 'pretty terrible' in a gorgeous turn of hypocrisy). Clarinets and poppy drums somehow combine seamlessly. Sadly though, lyrical blunders and clichés are abundant. "Old oak trees" make an appearance on 'Thorns' which is otherwise a pleasant, if forgettable, song. Yet when Simpson seems most comfortable is on tracks like 'Cemetery', a resplendent pop song that dares to use the line "I just hope your mind stays stable when you're Cain and unable to speak to me again". It's actually rather good.

If I were to mention the name Bon Iver in describing 'Hold On' I'd probably be signing my own death warrant, but it's the first thing that popped into my heard when I heard its opening harmonies. Somewhere along the way though it ditches the temperance and becomes a Snow Patrol pop song, which isn't terrible I suppose but I think ruins the authenticity of it. There are times though when the emotional whining becomes a little too much, and the title need be enough of a warning for 'I Need A Friend Tonight''s inherent soporific. Similarly, the intentions of 'Suburbs' are lost on me in amongst a sporadic rabble of blusters and snare drums. Simpson then takes us all for a walk on 'Sundown': "Oh, well the nights are so cold, and I'm breathing you in/ Well there's blood on the streets, and it's darker than sin". Vocally he's fine and the subdued nature of it is endearing, so I guess it fulfills its purpose.

However it's the lyrics of that and 'Farmer & His Gun' that just totally baffle me. Just try to make sense of this:

Run run rabbit run
Just don't get caught out by the farmer and his gun
Well hide hide rabbit hide
It's best to lose yourself before you ever lose your pride

Indeed. Things pick up towards the end though and he ditches some of these silly postures for pastures familiar - 'If I Lose It' could conceivably be distributed as a Damien Rice single. The vocals croon nicely and are backed by a safe, standard instrumental. It's musical bread. "Just open your eyes, something beautiful is happening" he crows on closer 'Riverbanks' in what's sure to find its way onto YouTube fan videos of One Tree Hill or period drama adaptations (ohay Jen). It's a predictable but pleasing ending.

So lyrically Simpson often shoots wide of the mark. Yet one has to commend him for trying something new and (finally) risk going solo, and for every single cynic unable to forgive him for Busted there's a strong pop song here that can wash them away. The sounds are safe but sweet, and a strong candidate for chart domination (and one that would, against Olly Murs or Wiz Khalifa, get my vote).

Rating: 5.5/10
Highlights: Cemetery, All At Once, Down Down Down
Avoid: I Need A Friend Tonight, Parachute, Thorns, Farmer & His Gun

Artwork Watch: He has thoughtfully picked up a Spanish guitar and posed with it to remind us all that this is an acoustic and folky album.
For fans of: Snow Patrol, dumbing down folk music.

CSS (Cansei de Ser Sexy) - La Liberación

2011-09-01T00:37:00.004+01:00

At risk of my blog becoming a samaritan stop for former indie darlings on the downwind of their careers, I should interject that I never really saw anything that exciting in the Brazilian outfit beyond a handful of catchy singles. So whilst their spot in the hearts of the malleable and disloyal might be deserted, let's try and sift through the wreckage. Not that bagging yourselves a Bobby Gillespie (Primal Scream, The Jesus and Mary Chain) and Mike Garson (David Bowie pianist) collaboration is anything to be ashamed of.

The opener 'I Love You' is a bold, loud and shrill kick-off that, with its staccato childish vocals and an instrumental that could quite conceivably be lifted off a Ke$ha album. It's not very good. Single 'Hits Me Like A Rock', about the unendingly exciting, surprising and thrilling aspect of music and its (repeated) discovery, has Gillespie on hand for an undeniably chirpy and cute track with some American western detours (very Scissor Sisters debut) and a husky, nostalgic vocal (I'm not sure how vocals can be nostalgic either. He sounds fond and subtle, okay?) from Gillespie. But the sugary pop is soon necked down with a shot of tequila in the form of 'City Grrrl', complete with brash synths and squelches and even a dash of brass. It's energetic enough but feels like a demo - as though all of the structural pieces have yet to be installed.

The repetitive flick between raw electronics and chipper country-pop becomes a little unnerving (like going line dancing with your aunt for Spring Break, or something...(not all anecdotes I insert are true, I must warn you)), especially on hearing 'Echo of Love'. An incredibly simple melody, it feels dated and uneventful. By contrast, 'You Could Have It All' verges on becoming overbearing - being that it saturates a simple piano tune with electronic sound effects, fluent lyrics and a heavy disco-rock bassline; but the band manage to pull it all together into the confines of a decent pop song. Finally some real signs of their primary indie tag make themselves clear on 'La Liberación' - an incredibly generic post-punk song that only really sticks out because they're singing in Spanish. Nonetheless, their vocals prevent the track from going stale, and instead inject a bit of youthful energy into it.

It does rather feel like an interlude though, since it neither follows on (from 'You Could Have It All') nor leads up to 'Partners In Crime'. "And from the get-go I always thought so: there's a place where we belong" they sing carelessly over some rather passionate piano pieces, with finally a genuine sense of untapped energy about them. Try to imagine Joy Division with Karen O as the vocalist and lyricist and that gives you 'Ruby Eyes' - a refreshingly laidback (by CSS standards) track that just feels more natural; less forced. "She's tired of all this crap" purrs Lovefoxxx on 'Rhythm to the Rebels' in amongst some profanities and other spat lyrics in some blatant attempt to regain the jejunity of their debut.

On 'Red Alert' the outfit are "all dressed up with nowhere to go" but by the end of the record (with the telling title 'Fuck Everything') the band could quite feasibly tour as a pastiche of themselves. Sure, trying to recreate something that was a huge success is often done (as I'm sure they themselves could've asked Bobby Gillespie and his, what, 20th re-release of Screamadelica now?) but it's been three albums now and if the band don't even care any more then why should the fans?

So whilst I did try to set out and find something new and exciting that the band could possibly have left in the tank - the band themselves even admit to the complete opposite. Alas, the CSS ship is sinking. Say hello to the Gossip on the seabed, guys.

Rating: 4.5/10
Highlights: Partners In Crime, Hits Me Like A Rock, You Could Have It All, Ruby Eyes
Avoid: Fuck Everything, Echo of Love, I Love You, Rhythm to the Rebels, Red Alert

Artwork Watch: Another bad parody of themselves.

Hard-Fi - Killer Sounds

2011-08-29T04:12:00.002+01:00

There needn't be too much imagination required to observe how fickle the UK indie press can be with a band: Hard-Fi have gone from the hot up-and-coming "thoroughly innovative, post-Millennial urban horrorscape" to... somewhere off the radar entirely. But anyone around in 2005 and 2007 will have been aware of some rather decent singles in the way of "Ready for the Weekend", "Cash Machine" and "Hard to Beat", so it's not like they were an entirely random phase (see: Art Brut). With Killer Sounds, though, the band are in a hard-to-come-by experimental phase and the record has electropop (probably thanks to producer Stuart Price), disco funk and even a dollop of Primal Scream.

So we'll start off with the scream. Single 'Good for Nothing' was a pleasant surprise to just about everybody - snowballing airplay from Zane Lowe and Soccer AM (perhaps predictably) - with its almost Beastie Boys instrumental dominated by percussions and rhythm sections that clash and ebb for fun, before the killer chorus grabs attention. One should always be wary of albums that begin with their two singles in chronological order, since they're suspect of "oh we'll shove these in first and by then they've bought it, so it's too late really". Canny strategics aside, 'Fire in the House' is a surprisingly dancy interlude for the band that I'm struggling to recollect in their history. A thudding synth helps drum in some fun choruses and riffs for a bit of a Killers feel. Never a bad thing. 'Give It Up' then screeches into view (or sound, since 'view' is an entirely different sense altogether), with a shade of disco about it thanks to its rhythms and synthesised strings in the background (think Sophie Ellis-Bextor remixed into Hard to Beat). Again, it's executed well and the end result is a catchy, decent track.

There's a return to convention on 'Bring It On' which, whilst somewhat unremarkable, does well to reaffirm the band's signature sound after such an eclectic introduction. Which is really a polite way of saying "this isn't really anything special". Perhaps the most unusual experimentation though is seen on 'Feels Good' with an electronic sitar hook that, for me, feels more annoying than appealing. Nonetheless, the rest of the track has a genuinely summery vibe that's always welcome, and the hook isn't too intrusive. 'Stop' then chants its way into focus with unnerving sound effects in the background that might make Muse blush. A xylophone even finds its way into the chorus. It's fun, no doubt, but by now fans are either desperately clinging at fabrics for some sense of cohesion or have just given up in favour of a Moroccan pub-disco. They're all the rage, I hear.

'Stay Alive' follows in 'Bring It On''s footsteps with much of the sounds and aesthetics that they brought to our attention on Stars of CCTV - and the chorus certainly matches up to some of their career highs. Quite where electro-dance fits into the Hard-Fi mission objective is lost on me, but 'Excitement' insists on finding its way onto the album. Imagine last year's Gorillaz track 'Glitter Freeze' but if Damon Albarn had bottled it at the last minute and turned the volume down to 5. Yeah. Not very exciting at all. However, their foray into dance is much more accomplished on 'Love Song' with its clear Daft Punk influences and subtler approach.

And just when you think you've heard them do everything, 'Sweat' is an (obviously subtle) attempt at grime/dancehall supremacy - sounding far more Hot Chip than Hard-Fi. The drums are a little similar to Dizzee Rascal's Fix Up, Look Sharp as well, which is another layer of surprise. For the final track the band go all acoustic in the poppiest of all sopfests ("My best friend died tonight", Archer announces) and whilst it is indeed quite schmaltzy it's again catchy enough to be pulled off.

So whilst the cool kids have somewhat flocked away from Hard-Fi, their third outing seems to me to be their most universally appealing. Of course there's something dreadfully un-hip about trying to cater for all audiences, if you care about that sort of thing, but Killer Sounds is essentially what they're advertising. A broad variety of interesting, unusual influences and genres that, whilst not necessarily thematic or cohesive, make for a far more convincing "who gives a fuck!" argument than Beady Eye. Yeah I went there.

Rating: 7/10
Highlights: Stay Alive, Sweat, Love Song, Good For Nothing, Fire in the House
Avoid: Bring It On, Excitement

Artwork Watch: 4 brightly-coloured skulls looking in different directions. Death, pop, artistic differences, band fractions? Or an entirely random image? I'm leaning towards the latter.

Will Young - Echoes

2011-08-24T02:58:00.003+01:00

The invention of the concept of a 'guilty pleasure' is often confusing - it can be given to the most sugary of bubblegum pop because of feelings of nostalgia or unbeatable hooks (Steps, S Club 7) but some have taken it down an entirely misleading route of cynicism and snobbery that leaves you wondering just how someone can feel guilty for liking Coldplay or Elbow other than out of fear of judgment from others (and to put the record straight: I'm a fan of both). Only recently I was considering my appreciation for Will Young's music and found myself using the words guilty pleasure - but why? Maybe it's the platform through which he found fame, since no self-respecting music fan would enjoy an X Factor winner much, but then I look back over some of his records and just think "fuck it."

Because when such records include All Time Love, Who Am I? or last year's excellent History with Groove Armada it's hard to feel guilty. Sure there have been some ill-chosen Beatles and Doors covers along the way but both of those were on his debut where his creative input was minimal at best, and we all know how terrible Simon Cowell is at making those decisions for you. Just how many talent-show winners have managed a ten year career anyway?

Echoes begins where fans of last year's Groove Armada collaboration might have hoped it would - single 'Jealousy' is straight from the line of Robyn-style sad electronics (indeed the tune is slightly derivative of Dancing On My Own). Young's voice is a pleasantly emotive falsetto over some gratifying soulful electronics, and it's another fine single. His electronic work with British duo Kish Mauve continues on 'Come On', another subtle and bubbling emotional plea that's perfect pop. There are moments though when Young's voice is too strong for the chilled atmosphere the music puts across: on 'Lie Next to Me' the chorus feels too loud and the vocal melody irritates me slightly.

Things turn up a notch on 'I Just Want A Lover', a slice of George Michael-inspired lovelorn electropop that probably would've dominated lounges and charts 10 years ago but now... might get lost in the crowd. Sneaky Sound System's Donnie Sloan co-writes 'Runaway' with some of their token beats in place, and it's a genuinely nice meander around Young's own vocal dexterities. Dan Carey then lends a hand to 'Outsider', a remnant of the old Young with its stripped-bare piano that's slightly too short to really puncture you. An effort to merge these two different styles is made and executed successfully on 'Silent Valentine', a fine vocal performance. There's then a strong Pet Shop Boys influence on Pascal Gabriel's (Ladyhawke, Marina + the Diamonds, Goldfrapp) 'Losing Myself', one of the strongest pop hooks on offer.

There are occasions though where the electro-soul goes a little awry. 'Personal Thunder' sounds like a mashup; it just doesn't feel like one song, since the instrumental seems utterly unresponsive to Young's voice. Such moments are rare though, as 'Hearts on Fire' quickly amends those problems with a monster of a backing. But it's the Gabriel-Young team that seems to thrive the most on Echoes, as 'Happy Now' proves. And just to cement the return of favour for last year, Groove Armada's Andy Cato co-writes 'Good Things', which is practically begging to be a single with its slick hooks and beats. To close, 'Safe From Harm' (not the Massive Attack song, I'm pleased to report) is yet another strong pop song with resonant History melodies and a desperate, convincing vocal.

I should be careful not to place too much of my own frustration and misanthropy towards other reality TV stars as reasoning behind my cherishing of a decent one - indeed, nothing here is particularly groundbreaking or phenomenal - but it does go a little way to restoring faith in the British pop industry. Of course he won't be grabbing any #1s thanks to the reign of grime shite, but Young has stayed true to himself throughout his career and never pandered to fads and trends (although whether he'd be able to go all Taio Cruz on your ass is doubtful). Echoes is a solid, meaningful album, and another successful one for Young.

Rating: 7/10
Highlights: Come On, Good Things, Jealousy, Runaway, Losing Myself
Avoid: Personal Thunder, Lie Next to Me

Artwork Watch: Almost makes me wish I'd written a bad review so I could slip in a "middle of the road" jibe. What's with the rise of unsaturated photography anyway?

Top 10 Radiohead songs

2011-08-20T05:31:00.002+01:00

Haven't posted anything in 10 days and have been quite busy with real life stuff (I got into university! I have a social life again! Yay!) but now, have something that all music journos would squirm over, a top ten list of Radiohead songs.

Just my favourites, not what I think are the greatest.

1. Just
2. No Surprises
3. Fake Plastic Trees
4. Pyramid Song
5. Street Spirit (Fade Out)
6. Everything In Its Right Place
7. Idioteque
8. The Tourist
9. Paranoid Android
10. Creep

Jon Fratelli - Psycho Jukebox

2011-08-12T22:20:00.002+01:00

Jon Fratelli would've been quite a long way down my list of potential multi-platform musicians from the 2000s lasting into the 2010s. But the former Fratelli has so far enjoyed a bit of success with the quite-alright-but-forgettable Codeine Velvet Club and has now decided to ditch them all and go entirely solo. It's no great secret that for pretty much the entirety of his career he'll have been fighting off Pitchforkers and their anger over the rise of pub-rock (and even for the most enduring listener, Chelsea Dagger got a little bit annoying) but perhaps the opportunity is now there for Fratelli, real name John Lawler, to make a creative stamp on the music world. Certainly his second band showed potential but seemed more pastiche than pastime, and never really inspired me.

The outlook just peering over the tracklisting is bleak. The false, doe-eyed nature of some of Fratelli's songwriting is transparent enough to give itself away with titles like 'Oh Shangri La' and 'Give Me My Heart Back MacGuire'. On Codeine Velvet Club (the self-titled record) there were heavy country-western twangs and rock-n-roll vibes throughout but they seemed to be weightier and more theatrical - sadly such attributes missing on Psycho Jukebox.

Don't let the intro to 'Tell Me Honey' fool you - the familiar heavy riffs quickly shadow the weird rhythm and we're thrusted into a tambourines-and-stomping chorus. There are times when it begins to feel like the theme tune to an educational piece about recycling and the chirpiness is initially infectious, but it fades after a couple of listens. The conventional 'Daddy Won't Pay Your Bill' has, again, catchy qualities with its predictable progressions and chorus, but the real problem here is the lyrics: a second person assault at nondescript bad girls with tedious rhymes. First single 'Santo Domingo' has a bit of a "potential Becks advert" buzz about it with an inoffensive tune; it's certainly catchy, and does what's necessary, just...nothing more. On 'Rhythm Doesn't Make You A Dancer' though there are glimpses of songwriting with...panache. There are times where Fratelli's delivery mimics Alex Turner's, to slightly put my neck on the line... but again, lyrically, there're too many hackneyed turns of phrase ("put your money where your mouth is", "1 plus 1 don't equal an answer"). Musically though it's fairly faultless.

After a heavily Fratellis opening the record then takes what I'd call a Flamingo turn. You see, 'The Band Played Just For Me' suffers from the same Springsteen-aiming posture executed with a damp squib that Brandon Flowers attempted last year. The rockabilly tune, the facsimile croaks and the die-hard attempts at earnesty in the lyrics are seen a mile off. 'Magic and Mayhem' feels like the Human League's 'Mirror Man' taken down a dirt track and being repeatedly hit over the head with a spade; a glitzy but sadly unoriginal tune masqueraded with some twinkles and twangs. The pub-rock returns though on 'She's My Shaker' and whether you're a fan of it or not, you've got to concede it's the approach he pulls off most convincingly. Catchy it is, but Chelsea Dagger it ain't.

The intro to 'Cavemen' though aspires to much more than Fratelli is capable of. With its rapid (not at all stolen from Tomorrow Never Knows) drum hook it immediately feels contemplative, but gooey devices seep through (the background "aaaah!"s, the echoes of his own lines). The bouncy 'Baby We're Refugees!' revives a little of the party spirit only for 'Oh Shangri La' to piss all over it again with unintentional self-referential undertones ("pointless noise"). Although as forced as the closure of 'Give Me My Heart Back MacGuire' feels, there's a swansong quality about it that feels like watching a nice sunset and stuff, yeah. Sorry. Lazy. ahaohoiha.

You'll notice I rarely quoted lyrics - solely because this is purely a musical affair and to think otherwise is delusional. Sadly, though, where Fratelli has aspired to more than his most successful niche is where he's fallen flattest: the retro-rock and nostalgia feels forced and is executed with absolutely no subtlety or imagination whatsoever. Sure, there's a couple of sing-along standards, as on any Fratelli record, but any hope for an exciting and daring collection of jukebox standards are scuppered.

Rating: 3.5/10
Highlights: Santo Domingo, Give Me My Heart Back MacGuire, Rhythm Doesn't Make You A Dancer, Baby We're Refugees!
Avoid: The Band Played Just For Me, Daddy Won't Pay Your Bill, Oh Shangri La, Cavemen

Artwork Watch: Name me one good album where the artist is sat on an amplifier on its cover.
For fans of:

The Throne - Watch the Throne

2011-08-10T02:23:00.003+01:00

It's been less than a year since the release of the phenomenal My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy but the anticipation and wait behind this has felt already like a lifetime. For Watch the Throne, West teams up with fellow mega-star Jay-Z and a host of equally massive guests and samples. With guest credits featuring Otis Redding, Nina Simone, James Brown and Beyoncé, as well as up-and-coming Frank Ocean, this is very much an extravagant affair. Gone are the melodramatic self-flagellations seen on MBDTF but one shouldn't be fooled into believing this is a who-you-know piece of slap-dash indulgence: money and egos are discussed at short-hand whilst race, politics and depression take centre stage.

There have been some too who believe this to be a return to classic Kanye/Jay. The single 'Otis' seemed irreverent in its heavy sampling and thriving off of nostalgic throwbacks with its looped horns and organs, and bouncing almost nonsensical tongue-twisters around such as "Sophisticated ignorance, write my curses in cursive". Of course much debt is owed to Otis Redding's classic Try A Little Tenderness which, I agree, "sounds so soulful", but the duo blend into an enthralling summer anthem.

The record begins though with 'No Church in the Wild' and its pointedly darker tune and unrecognisable samples for a tense backdrop to Frank Ocean's chorus: "What’s a mob to a king? What’s a king to a god? What’s a god to a non-believer? Who don’t believe in anything?" There's of course some shock-lyrics when Jay-Z references Jesus and Kanye in the same frame, before Kanye himself creates his own religion: "deception is the only felony/ So never fuck nobody without tellin’ me". Monkeys screech and sirens blare to add to the atmosphere. Of course the most pop potential comes in 'Lift Off' with its sights set high in Beyoncé and you can hear the hip-hop purists in the distance forming a lynch-mob, because whilst this is a fairly obvious attempt at recreating an All of the Lights spectacular it falls slightly short - but is almost a pleasant surprise in being so unexpectedly restrained.

In a bit of a rarity on this record, 'Niggas in Paris' places Jay-Z in lead position and has the arguably better delivery despite Kanye being audacious enough to reference the royal wedding, sampling dialogue from Will Ferrell, and the line "Excuse my French but I’m in France (I’m just sayin)". The synthloop can become irritating at times but otherwise fades into the background. After Otis, 'Gotta Have It' has an impressive 3 different samples all from James Brown - and the pair have some of their strongest and smoothest flows on here but the background rapidly becomes a bit dull. On 'New Day' it's time for Nina Simone to be put through production effects until we have a virtually whole new Feeling Good. The two address their future sons and apologise for the downsides of worldwide fame and "you ain't even alive, paparazzi pursuing ya ". "And I'll never let him ever hit a strip club," Kanye ponders, "I learned the hard way, that ain't the place to get love". It's a poignant and bleak reflection of celebrity.

One of the early leaks from the project, 'That's My Bitch' features Elly Jackson (La Roux) and Justin Vernon (Bon Iver) repeating their guest spots from My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy. The drums and synth hooks behind this track make it one of the instantaneous hits on offer, but lyrically this is one of those ill-fated swagger-tracks. "I mean Marilyn Monroe she's quite nice but why All the pretty icons always all white?" Carter muses in a slight bit of amnesia relating to pre-civil rights USA. For me the most quickly tiring track, thanks to its instrumental, is 'Welcome to the Jungle' but we can blame Swizz Beatz for that one. "Where the fuck is the press? Where the fuck is the Pres? Either they know or don't care I'm fucking depressed" Jay-Z announces towards the end and it's a little difficult to feel sympathy for him given the current climate. A burst of energy then comes in 'Who Gon' Stop Me?' with the hilarious "that's pig latin, itch-bay!" The internet seems to be a bit pissed off about the Flux Pavillion sample but dubstep is dead to me so I don't give a shit. This is good.

"The paper read "murder - Black-on-black murder" again" the chorus to 'Murder to Excellence' laments, a track which comes in two parts produced by different men. I personally prefer the first half with Swizz Beatz' take on some Romanian folk singing but then that's something I'm always a fan of. Frank Ocean makes his second appearance on 'Made in America', a soulful testament to their success that sees Jay-Z pledging allegiance to his grandmother and Kanye reminiscing about his mother. You'd have to be a bit of a senseless dick to write this off as corny or fake. We reach the end then with 'Why I Love You' and Mr. Hudson with a not-very-subtle Cassius sample that I'd be surprised if it didn't make it as a single. The talents bow out with a quickfire exchange of dialogue (Jay-Z: Got a pistol under my pillow/ Kanye: I've never been a deep sleeper).

Okay so it doesn't need to be said that this isn't the best record that either of them has come up with, but I don't think that was ever their ambition here. What we have though is a fine collection of fun, soulful and heartfelt anthems that stretches them to the limits and offers a number of surprises - and in the pop world and its dabblings with Hip Hop, those surprises are far and few between.

Rating: 8/10
Highlights: Why I Love You, Otis, No Church in the Wild, Who Gon' Stop Me, Murder to Excellence, Made In America
Avoid: Welcome to the Jungle

Artwork Watch: Probably my favourite so far this year - it's bold, it's extravagant, it's exaggerated and something only they could get away with.

LMFAO - Sorry For Party Rocking

2011-08-09T04:56:00.002+01:00

Short review: ROFL. 1/10

It has LMFAO. It has Natalia Kills. It has will.i.am. This is not my cup of tea. But I have tried, in the year or two I've been writing reviews now, to listen to everything (at least) twice before I make a judgment on its worth. The problem of course is that, in listening to this album twice, I have now put more effort into Sorry For Party Rocking than LMFAO themselves.

To further this marvellous achievement I shall now dissect my review into 10 lessons - one for each track.

[I] When people say "LMFAO" they're probably not really laughing. - Rock the Beat II
Comedy has no place in dance music. Especially for unfunny people. So to commence this album with the spoken introduction is just opening yourself up for a world of embarrassment and cheese. "A short time ago in a galaxy close-closely near- is it closely?" this cartoon voice breaks character in some bizarre attempt to shatter their own fourth wall. They cite their breakthrough on April Fool's Day 2007 as a kind of justification to act like arseholes, before charmingly declaring "Move your feet onto the floor; start to freak and drink some more, ho!" Well it's nice to have a mission statement.

[II] I've heard it all before... - Sorry For Party Rocking
This is the true lyrical masterpiece of the album. "I'll be up in the bar looking for a hottie to bone"... "popping bottles in the house and models in the VIP"... "haters don't like, we got the spotlight". But to intersperse these nuggets of wisdom with the repeated title shows a fascinating lack of self-awareness. It begs the question: are they aware of how awful they are, and if so, just what exactly is the price to put aside your dignity?

[III] Success =/= Virtue - Party Rock Anthem (feat. Lauren Bennett & GoonRock)
I don't think it needs to be made clear that having a #1 single is not necessarily indicative of talent or creativity. Cher Lloyd is the current UK number 1; Mr. Blobby, Bob the Builder and Eamon and Frankee have had #1s. All you need is an immediately repetitive and easily ascertained gimmick (the shuffle) and bingo.

[IV] Delusion and fame correlate easily - Sexy And I Know It
I know sexuality and attraction are subjective at the best of times but I wouldn't hesitate to section anyone who considered these two clowns 'sexy'. I needn't analyse the song beyond its opening lyric: "When I walk on by, girls be looking like damn he fly". Sure they do, boys.

[V] Nausea - Champagne Showers (feat. Natalia Kills)
Okay so first off, a positive: this track renders Natalia Kills utterly useless and points out how much of a total fucking joke she is. Hats off to them for making it clear. However, their part in this is equally poor. This single accurately portrays the obsession with cheap glamour that weekly nightclubbers are so eager to seek - and in amongst all of the eurodance synths that pluck away at your senses there's of course the alcoholic undertones that have the same effect. Now personally I find champagne a greatly overrated, unpleasant taste and smell and the track thus feels like a sweaty, sticky mess. Ew.

[VI] Money can't buy you love - One Day
"Money in the bank, my car brand new. I got everything I want, but you... House on a hill, hollywood view, got everything I want but you". You see there's a bit of a habit around mainstream dance-pop to namedrop brand names and jetsetting lifestyles, that it ultimately renders the groundbreaking realisation, that such pursuits are unfulfilling and vacuous, glorious to those of us who've observed from the sidelines going "I told you so". So the next time you're about to go shopping for Ed Hardy t-shirts, put them down and head off to Waterstones.

[VII] The Digital Age - Take It to the Hole (feat. Busta Rhymes)
Aside from all of the 80s revivals happening in indie, rock and dance genres at the moment, and the rise of dubstep and experimental individualism, mainstream pop has been subject to a great surge in electronics in the past 5 years. But with all of this experimentation there has to be a counterweight - and that is repetitive, infuriating "hooks" in place of a tune. The loop on this track... I can only report it as the sound of Satan flossing with your intestines.

[VIII] Too many cooks spoil the broth - Best Night (feat. will.i.am, GoonRock & Eva Simons)
On first impression this track might appear to be 'quite good'. That is because it employs the cunning tactic of using less obstructive synths and sound effects, and it sounds a lot less soul-destroying. However, with the huge producer will.i.am. at the helm you'd be forgiven for expecting something a little more from this. It still gyrates a repetitive synth-tune in your face, and it still stagnates in a lack of melody or interest.

[IX] Sexting is not good grounds for a relationship - All Night Long (feat. Lisa)
"I read your text sayin' whatchu wanna do to me."
And there was me thinking Vodafone would block death threats.

[X] The death of Hip Hop - With You
Since the rise of poseurs like 50 Cent and Snoop Dogg whose creative messages and wordplay pretty much ends at telling girls how nice their posteriors are, the reputation of Hip-Hop has taken a bit of a beating. Whilst there are indeed innovators and artists in the field, the message of 'With You'? "Memories fade like old leather/ but the music that we make gonna last forever".

Imagine you've spent a couple of hundred on a Nintendo DS. Now imagine that you've accidentally spilled some Lucozade on it whilst you were playing Mario Kart. The ensuing fault-noises and beeps would have more structure and charm than this barrage of shite. If I were pushed to find a positive in amongst all of this rubble, I can take solace in the fact that no cherished songs were sampled or covered. This is all entirely original. I can also count myself lucky to be in the company of friends who'll agree that this is dirge, and therefore this can be easily avoided. Maybe LMFAO are subliminally providing an educational awareness of how bad society can get if you turn your back on it - in which case they just might be the Dispatches of the music world - but that would sadly require a plan, and therefore, thought.

Rating: 0.5/10
Highlights: Party Rockin' (if you aren't bored of it already), Best Night (it's less annoying, but by no means any good).
Avoid: Everything else.

Artwork Watch: A mostly-naked torso, an embarrassing tattoo, vulgar accessories, garish font, obvious camel-toe and stupid facial expressions. Almost artistic in its representative qualities.
For fans of: Suicide.

Joss Stone - LP1

2011-08-04T23:52:00.005+01:00

Devonshire talents are rare to come by. We've done pretty well for ourselves with Muse, Chris Martin and Seth Lakeman all coming from the largest and greenest county, but almost ten years ago we were all proud of a teenage soul sensation who'd taken the country by storm. Joss Stone wasn't actually born here but it's far too late for me to change my angle now, and after a burst of success with teenage talent shows and a cross-Atlantic hit debut The Soul Sessions she seems to have crashed back down to Earth thanks to a couple of faux pas at the 2007 BRIT Awards.

No Brit likes one of their own to go off and make it big in the USA. Ask Radiohead, whose release of Kid A initially met a world of "oh, is that it?"s and claims that (what Australians call) the Tall Poppy Syndrome had come into effect. There is some truth in a certain possessive nature amongst the British - and much of the backlash aimed at Stone following her new image and American drawl in 2007 was probably out of spite. Perhaps all of this is the reason to start afresh (or so the album title would have us believe) - arguably a more noble route than pleading for forgiveness. Put together in just 6 days with Eurythmic Dave Stewart, it poises Stone in one of her most stylistically varied records.

We start strongly with an altruist rant in the form of 'Newborn', complaining about the lack of human compassion and soaring self-interest: "We're stiffening our love" she muses in amongst some faultless powerful vocals, but the lyrics for me feel a little too vague and misdirected to really resonate. Hippie vibes are ditched in favour of some disco funk (think Superstition with no hook) on 'Karma' which is a bit of a woman-scorned vendetta anthem that culminates with a satisfying "you're the bitch!" and some sideshows involving guns and vengeance. It's entertaining. Certainly this new Joss appears to have a bit of attitude, that much is clear on 'Don't Stop Lying to Me Now' - but lyrically it suffers from so many clichés ("Got no use for your excuses", rhyming fight with right) and the backdrop, whilst all fun and ragtime, doesn't quite feel at ease with the passion of her voice.

A predominantly pop route is taken in 'Last One to Know' (think a Kelly Clarkson single) - where whispers and husks from Stone give it a bit of a less contrived edge, and vocally she again excels. Instrumentally it sounds a little similar to Adele's Set Fire to the Rain (particularly during the strings) but it's a minor detail. I can't really explain the positioning of 'Drive All Night' as track 5, unless it's meant as a kind of interlude whilst the angry Joss goes backstage to swill some JD, because at 5 minutes long and with an utterly unoriginal structure it really drags the record down when it was really going. One of her nicest vocal performances (without being overbearing) is seen on 'Cry Myself to Sleep', which is carried along with a pleasant tune.

Single 'Somehow' initially disappointed because the chorus, to me, felt like it was stopping just as it begun to kick-off. The choruses sound a little like last year's Fuck You! single from Cee-Lo, but there's a couple of guitar hooks thrown in for fun. It's a gloriously retro affair and that's something I'm a bit of a sucker for. Sadly it only gets worse: 'Landlord' is an acoustic burst (and positioning that right after a heavily produced single is a risk) that again suffers from tired lyrics ("I just wanna be your lover baby/ I want you with me: no other lady") and nothing in the way of tune, melody or really magnificent vocals, to be honest. 'Boat Yard' has the same problems despite a bit of an 80s drumbeat and some other uninspired instrumental inclusions (the guitar twangs, the generic piano tinkles).

Thankfully 'Take Good Care' makes up for that with an attention-grabbing vocal performance and country-pop guitars accentuating her huskiness. It'd be an ideal closer but sadly such duties are left to the boring 'Cutting the Breeze' with its Lennykravitzish (coined by me, watch out, it'll be everywhere soon) "guitars" that really aren't guitars but lies. Oh well.

With the portrayal of Stone this side of the pond in our media, you'd expect another carcrash in this album. Certainly the UK reviewing press has been a little harsh and that's even with an abduction conspiracy earlier in the year in her favour. But in amongst all of the pantomime that is Joss Stone's love/hate affair with the British press I think her vocal talents are forgotten too often. LP1 I think suffers a little bit from attempting to bridge too many genres in a way that only Janis Joplin could - and a lot of the stylistic choices (particularly the album sleeve) give this a bit of a farcical feel. However, musically there are great pop songs here. Give her a chance, United Kingdom.

Rating: 6/10
Highlights: Somehow, Karma, Take Good Care, Last One to Know, Newborn
Avoid: Landlord, Boat Yard, Drive All Night, Cutting the Breeze

Artwork Watch: Oooh, I've got a nosering, how fucking hardcore am I?

Viva Brother - Famous First Words

2011-08-04T04:47:00.002+01:00

The press haven't been too kind on Viva Brother. Luck hasn't either. After creating a little ripple of noise the band, formerly Brother, were forced to change name or face a lawsuit from an Australian outfit of the same name - all of this before an embarassing U-Turn from the NME, who've gone from "The return of the great British guitar band" to a lukewarm review that'd probably please Razorlight. You needn't look too far, if you Google their name, for something in the way of an attention-grabbing statement from the band taken in a negative stance, but in a world of "I'm a Gallagher brother, here's what I think, watch as this thought somehow becomes news" you can't really fault a new band for trying to stand out. Especially in that economic climate. And other such boring observations.

The problem is I'm not a very sympathetic person. Acts such as Yuck, Little Comets, The Joy Formidable and The Vaccines have all managed to garner some form of attention without bragging, slagging off contemporaries or wearing sunglasses all the fucking time. So let's cut the bullshit and assess the music.

From the very get-go there's obviously a strong 90s influence with the opening "whoa"s and a general Suede-imitation feel. Singer Lee Newell has certainly got an endearing energy about him and is backed ably by some howls and carefree harmonising - it's a fun opener all around. There're no prizes for guessing the most obvious (vocal, at least) similarity on 'Still Here' but it feels almost more like a soundtrack to some teen-comedy in the early 2000s. Lyrically they have more in common with B*Witched, though: "If you do, if you don’t, if you say that you won’t" being a genuine line. Musically though it's again pretty direct and not at all bad, just... nothing new.

The vocals begin to verge on the irritating in 'David' though with teen-scene groans and twangs that do little else than disguise the lyrics: "He makes a meal out of everything, but he’s never had me round for tea". Hmm. The melody's a little similar to Oasis' "Digsy's Dinner" or Blur's "Charmless Man" which would be rather remarkable if it was original or backed by decent lyrics. Riffs aplenty in 'High Street Low Lives' but it's too derivative to really make a name for itself - the most clichéd of choruses doesn't help that ("This is real and I'm free, this is what I wanna be", it begins). If vocals were subject to copyright I reckon Liam Gallagher would have a fairly solid claim to some of 'Electric Daydream's royalties. Of course now that the band themselves have decided to go and do some Beatles rip-offs, and Damon Albarn's trying to do everything musically possible, there's a bit of a gap in the market for some gobby Britpop revivalists - ED is certainly catchy in the same vein as Don't Look Back in Anger but seriously lacks in any emotional poignancy or anthemic chorals.

One of the highlights however is 'Darling Buds of May': a repetitive, hooking instrumental with a probable pisstake of lyricism ("It is what it is, it is what it is... I heard police last night, their sirens, oooh") attached - probable since the clear focus here was on producing the track behind it. 'Otherside' suffers from the same problems - there are some fun riffs towards the end but is otherwise a cacophony of riffs-you've-heard-before and terrible lyrics. Their Cigarettes and Alcohol derivative 'Fly By Nights' is a little like watching a bunch of 18 year olds starting a tribute band with a Topman wardrobe and spending their EMA on boxes of Fosters.

There's feedback at the start of 'False Alarm' which is obviously a sign of dark things to come. But literally as the track plucks away at my eardrums I cannot summon even the minutest of fucks to give about it. 'Time Machine' is certainly strong enough to be considered kinda-on-par-with-Dig Out Your Soul which could be a compliment depending on your point of view.

The problem is even the album title reeks of poseur material - and almost every track thereon suffers from the same problem. Pair this with a handful of ill-advised press statements and Twitter updates and you've got the recipe for Britain's next most-hated band. Some would argue it's better to make a name for yourself either way but it usually helps if your music is even nearly as memorable.

Rating: 4.5/10
Highlights: Time Machine, Darling Buds of May, Still Here
Avoid: Fly By Nights, High Street Low Lives, Otherside, False Alarm

Artwork Watch: There's a barber shop. There's four of them in the band. Do you see what joke I'm going to make? Razorshite. Yeah.
For fans of: Pretending the 90s didn't end, and pretending Liam Gallagher is somehow "decent".

Big Talk - Big Talk

2011-07-26T13:26:00.004+01:00

Being a fan of the Killers in the past 5 years has been a tempestuous relationship. 'Day and Age' of course proved a little divisive in its experimentation with the beepier side of the musical spectrum, and whilst achieving some negligible success it felt a little half-baked: what was to come next wasn't much better. As much as I could waffle on about how much I fancy the pants off Brandon Flowers, last year's Flamingo really was average at best. So the times are a little bit worrying for someone who holds Sam's Town as his favourite record of the noughties - but fear no more, another of The Killers is going to tackle a solo record. Sort-of.

Drummer of the American giants, Ronnie Vanucci Jr., has teamed up with Taylor Milne and former Weezer/Tegan and Sara bassist Matt Sharp for this, a loud country-rock assault. If you don't like Springsteen you'd probably be better off looking elsewhere. It kicks off tremendously with 'Katzenjammer', a heavyset representation of Real~America~ (it opens, "Is it too early for whiskey?") that jolts along a country road with a stupidly simple riff-hook that's difficult to resist. He even manages to assert a pretty solid Flowers impression on 'Getaways', which verges a little on the Orson side of American cheese.

'Under Water' does well to hammer in some less-annoying riffs, but marks the end of the theatrics: on 'The Next One Living' we're introduced to a much gentler, more easygoing rhythm with convincing catchiness. Those looking to this for a little bit of a Killers fix might find comfort in 'Replica' with its drivetime safeties and somewhat nonsense lyrics - all criticisms becoming redundant when its chorus kicks in.

On 'No Whiskey' the group try a simpler blues approach which they pull off comfortably but without anything particularly interesting or exciting, even with those rich flicks around the halfway-point onwards. The typical "trouble with the law" and "taking it all too easy" make 'Girl At Sunrise' feel stale, and the riffs thud along repetitively like a Bon Jovi-induced nightmare. The lyrical clichés and clap-along rhythms of 'White Dove' again drag the album into a dangerous pastiche project, before 'Living In Pictures' injects some well-timed adrenaline.

'Hunting Season' is pleasant enough to verge on the line that separates alright and boring, but it's wobbling. The barndance is almost upon us in the raucous 'A Fine Time To Need Me' that genuinely initially reminded me of Randy Newman's Strange Things from the (first) Toy Story soundtrack. It's certainly lovely and probably right up someone's alley... just not mine. We finish with 'Big Eye' which, like 'No Whiskey', feels like a half-hearted attempt at asserting some kind of devil-may-care attitude after all of the line-dancing. I'm unconvinced.

Ultimately? I feel no different to how I felt after listening to Flamingo. After the initial kick of "Oooh, some new Killers stuff!" you're eventually left scraping at the floor for something that might even come close to resembling Bones or Spaceman, and are really left with some generic dirge. There are one or two decent tracks here but this really isn't something I see myself coming back to.

Rating: 5/10
Highlights: Katzenjammer, The Next One Living, Replica, Under Water
Avoid: Girl At Sunrise, White Dove, Hunting Season, No Whiskey

Artwork Watch: Probably an attempt at "local diner" authenticity that's totally lost on me.
For fans of: Shania Twain, boredom, chewing grass.

Kelly Rowland - Here I Am

2011-07-24T05:05:00.004+01:00

Do you remember when Destiny's Child split up and Kelly Rowland surprised everyone by proving that two members of the group could sustain a successful solo career? Well despite no real monumental success, Rowland is still going - but has she sold her soul to the devil that is this squalid vat of shite eurodance-cum-guest spot from Pitbull/Lil Wayne? Short answer: Yes. I'm afraid the woman behind some of the early 2000s' surprise hits (and good hits, at that) such as 'Stole', 'Can't Nobody' and Nelly's 'Dilemma' has, after some brief flirtations in 'Like This' and 'Work', become a soulless drone of the David Guetta persuasion.

Because, whilst last year's comeback 'Commander' was one of the French DJ's high points, it only goes downhill from there. So tuck yourselves in, this one's going to be nasty.

We start off with 'I'm Dat Chick' which straight away ditches any sense of vocabulary: "I'm putting on a show so you can check me out/ This chick knows she cute so what you talking bout?" Indeed. Whilst the track is full of what idiots may call 'swagger' or 'heat', it's energetic in the same sense that a fish flaps about on dry land before death. "Every good woman need a good man" Rowland purrs in a shocking double-attack on feminism and grammar on 'Work It Man', which introduces us to the charming Lil Playy (because the pop world was in dire need of another 'rapper' available for guest slots) who chips in with "I've got my eyes on you Kelly, textin' on your cell-y". Well. Another tick for suicide right there.

The sleaze is poured on in single 'Motivation' with an arguably catchy beat (although the inevitable 20 plays a day from my sister's Kiss channel-viewing habits might have something to do with that). I'm then faced with the problem of trying to stay level-headed when writing critically about Lil Wayne, which is much like being introduced to, and expected to shake hands with, the man who's just slaughtered your pets. So abhorrent and devoid of any ounce of originality, talent or worth, his slippery double-entendres here have has much sex appeal as a rotting whale carcass. By 'Lay It On Me' you're almost ticking off every dance-pop cliché as the J.R. Rotem klaxon kicks it off (although I'm informed he has no responsibility here). The tune is rather conventional and before I get ahead of myself and say "is decent", I very much doubt I'll remember how this goes once it's over.

Let's reduce 'Feeling Me Right Now' to some lyrical highlights:

"It’s like no one’s in the VIP but you and me
I know which bed I’m in tonight, baby"

"So back, back, back it up, you’re the one I got my eye on
Don’t give me your number, its already in my iPhone"

"Feeling great, looking like money
She aint scared to spend it, she be stunting on you dummies"

Yeah. 'Turn It Up' is a slightly more forgivable track because it reels in a few of the blusters and background fillers in favour of a comparatively quieter and simpler tune. The chorus is capable but again nowhere near even Rowland's career highs, which are surely rapidly slipping away now. 'All of the Night' then tries to restore some of the sensual R&B 'foreplay' (the song's own words - aren't we all so dignified now?) and miraculously required 9 writers. Amazing. There's finally a sign of a bit of a ballad in 'Keep It Between Us' and it's a welcome inclusion. It's a slight reminder that Rowland has a strong voice and is a natural popstar, a reminder that we really shouldn't need.

Of course, last year's 'Commander' makes it onto the record because - let's face it - it's a bit of a reminder that sometimes she can have a decent single. If you're unfamiliar with it then you should expect a slight military theme over some Guetta synths commanding (geddit?) you to dance! Genius. Just when you think she's ended on a slight positive, 'Down For Whatever' waltzes in with a tune (a generous turn of phrase, let's be honest) that's essentially Jennifer Lopez's On The Floor without the Lambada. Not RedOne's finest hour, but then does he have any without Lady GaGa? Doubtful. The supposed feature slot from The WAVs is also nowhere to be seen.

For someone so eager to present herself on a plate (with the album title, at least) it seems remarkable that one should indulge in so many obscuring musical gimmicks: autotune here, 239 guest slots there. This record is the absolute antithesis to growth. What's truly staggering though is that 11 tracks were deemed not good enough to make this. But then one of them features Pitbull, so maybe we should be thankful.

Rating: 1.5/10
Highlights: Commander, Keep It Between Us, Turn It Up
Avoid: All of the Night, Down For Whatever, Motivation, Lay It On Me, Work It Man

Artwork Watch: Blue tints are never a good sign. Ewww x 100.

Washed Out - Within and Without

2011-07-22T18:26:00.002+01:00

Just when you think you've heard enough synthpop this year to last a lifetime, along comes a debut record that could, quite arguably, be the very best of the lot. Georgian (as in the state, not the country, although I've now got a craving for some Eastern European synths) soloist Washed Out has already amassed some considerable praise for this, his first record, after a handful of EPs and free downloads. But for Ernest Greene, this success has possibly come out of nowhere.

And let's face it, it's rather difficult to stand out as an electronic artist at the moment. Even down to the fundamental pop successes where seemingly the least talented are most rewarded (Guetta, Chase and Status) but in the indie environment too, where even I (and I consider myself to be in the shallow end of the online pool) have probably reviewed 50 electronic albums this year. But even if it's for the artwork, Within And Without is one such stand-out.

Opener 'Eyes Be Closed' could feasibly stand up there with the mainstream chart-synth botherers and indeed should, with genuine breakdown moments (the drums at 2:48; the hallucinations of 3:34 onwards), and then the melodies of 'Echoes' are just as instantly catchy as the likes of 'Miami 2 Ibiza' or whatever it is the Ministry of Sound pretends to be good. The beat is pretty slick too, so it's definitely one for the clubs. One of my favourites from the record, 'Amor Fati' soothes with a very 90s ambience that had a big impact on the output from the likes of Groove Armada, Jakatta or Massive Attack.

My absolute favourite from the record though is 'Soft', which can only be described as the sonic equivalent of sitting on my balcony with friends in the summer. It's got a hauntingly quiet deception about it that manages to somehow surround you with its distortion and its trails, that on a couple of occasions I wasn't sure if I was listening to my laptop overheating. It's just mesmerising. 'Far Away' introduces a little more instrumentation to the fray with some strings and a truncuating bassline - initially the percussion in the foreground appears distracting, but once the glockenspiel (I think) melodies kick off, it feels part of the furniture. 'Before' is so shoegazed that you might need to click your fingers a couple of times to snap out of a trance.

There's of course something very sensual about 'You and I' as the title would suggest, but words aren't necessary to gain this impression: the beat in particular is perfect. I was reading F. Scott Fitzgerald's Tender is the Night and, without wanting to spoil too much, the description of affection between Rosemary and Dick at several moments throughout the novel would be greatly matched by this track. Whispers from Caroline Polachek exacerbate that atmosphere. The title track 'Within and Without' to me feels a little repetitive of some of the other sounds on previous tracks, but the chorus again ticks off yet another sublime synth that - in amongst all of the trip-hop segments - feel serene. The piano tunes on 'A Dedication' too are a perfect finale, complimenting the subtle vocals and beat in much the same way Massive Attack have pulled off hits like Teardrop or Safe From Harm

Quite whether this fixation will last into the autumnal months remains to be seen - but for now, in July, it's hard not to get caught up in all of the dusk-lit romance here. The sounds on offer may at first appear to be extremely repetitive but if anything the entire listen of the record feels like a very good night out indeed. This one might just grow to be your favourite too.

Rating: 9/10
Highlights: Amor Fati, Soft, Eyes Be Closed, Before, You and I
Avoid: n/a

Artwork Watch: The sheets are ruffled, the lettering is split into 3 columns despite only being 2 words, there's attractive people fornicating: this is serious business, folks. (On a serious note, I like it)
For fans of: Holy Ghost!, Cut Copy, Metronomy, Massive Attack

Alice Gold - Seven Rainbows

2011-07-22T04:00:00.003+01:00

In the same week that PJ Harvey, Adele and Anna Calvi were announced as, amongst Katy B, Mercury Prize nominees I find myself with the increasingly common task of assessing a solo female's debut: but fear not, because the term "Kate Bush inspiration" can probably go largely untouched here. Because in today's world of extroverted chanteuses with a penchant for lace and sepia photography, Alice Gold is refreshingly inspired by some more straightforward greats. Press releases allude to Janis Joplin and Jimi Hendrix; big words indeed but at least it's different.

Then you notice that it's been produced by Dan Carey, the man behind records from the likes of Hot Chip, Franz Ferdinand and Lily Allen. The latter is certainly evident on the adolescent whinges of tracks like 'Conversations of Love' or 'End of the World', but there are genuine moments of edge in amongst all the Xenomania tweaks and alt-pop frills.

The record certainly starts off in the pop ballpark. 'Seasons Change' has a soaring sunny/nostalgic chorus separated by a light Motown beat in the verses. It's impossible to hate, and whilst she teeters on the wall separating Scissor Sisters camp and psychedelic-cool, it quickly becomes a hook. 'Runaway Love' is bouncier with some organ riffs providing a bit of a 50s aesthetic; the chorus is a little irritating until she bursts into bridges or earnest vocal-acrobatics (think Amy Winehouse in the Frank era). The very first thing I thought when I heard 'And You'll Be There' was Blondie's "Rapture". It pretty much replicates the rhythm to the archetypal disco-punk track and is sadly lacking elsewhere. It's certainly a nice testament to the early 80s hip-hop influences on pop though.

'Cry Cry Cry' is a little too obvious for me to resonate, and whilst the rhythms are certainly jerky enough to embed themselves in your subconscious, it feels like a track that's been imitated on so many Paloma Faith, VV Brown and Ellie Gouldings before. The first signs of a bluesy tint appear with opening line "The devil got a chip on his shoulder" on 'How Long Can These Streets Be Empty?' - but it's Gold's vocals that really carry the most menace here. This is certainly clear on the excellent single 'Orbiter', complete with effortlessly catchy riff and cute space wordplay. The clearest Hendrix influence is in the echoes of her voice on 'Conversations of Love', even going as far as to reference "midnight candles" - the chorus cries offer a (perhaps first) glimpse of the unpolished Gold. (I hadn't even thought of a Fool's Gold pun until now. Balls.)

Then it begins to get a bit dreary. 'Fairweather Friend' feels like it goes on forever with its attempts at Karen O evocations (the background cackles), sounding a little bit like I Blame Coco's "Caesar" with nowhere near as much energy. The blueprints are all there but it feels like a demo. 'Sadness is Coming' feels a little bit familiar courtesy of Duffy and Adele record-domninance in the past 5 years, but she's more suggestive than foghorn. She decides to end the record with a chunk of 70s soul-pop in the way of 'End of the World'; all brisk choruses and obvious progressions. It's very cliché: girl sings cheerily about miserable topic, has a subdued bridge, returns with triumphant chorus. But it's a formula that just somehow works. Final track 'Before' muses "why is the day so long?" for a spot of romantic bother, and it's again just impossible to dislike.

And you'd think someone with the audacity to claim Joplin or Hendrix influences in amongst all of this nostalgia-pop is very easy, very easy indeed to hate. So I urge you, ignore those claims. What's here is a very solid pop record with rock and disco splurges. Nothing more, nothing less.

Rating: 7/10
Highlights: Seasons Change, End of the World, Conversations of Love, And You'll Be There, Orbiter, Sadness Is Coming
Avoid: Fairweather Friend, Cry Cry Cry
Artwork Watch: It's um. It's her. It's a logo. It's some colours. Not really much to say, so I'll slag off her Carrie dress.
For fans of: VV Brown, Paloma Faith, Ellie Goulding

The Horrors - Skying

2011-07-14T02:21:00.002+01:00

Something about pre-enlightened Shaun (that's me, just in case) had placed The Horrors in amongst a big list of what I'd like to call 'name bands'. The ones who you've heard the name of but all seem to blend together in one large dollop of NME-approved boringness. I was probably initially turned off by their image: they'd appeared in the Mighty Boosh and they looked like the Russell Brand variety of goth-lite weirdos. So now that I've probably insulted them with two senses, let's pay a little more attention to the former. Their third album now, 'Skying' has delivered the band with their first UK top-ten position (an impressive #5, in fact) and some of their strongest reviews.

Indeed things begin with a very much en vogue sonic - 'Changing the Rain' has a blustery brass introduction which eventually filter into a percussion loop and gritty vocals, not unlike this year's Battles album (especially with the chorus' Doves-like optimism). It's convincing. 'You Said' then bursts in like the closing credits of a Super Mario game before appeasing us with some 80s goth-electronics that manage to somehow shine through as uplifting.

The synth-assault doesn't let up: 'I Can See Through You' could easily be prescribed to post-Breakfast Club nostalgics as a sedative, but still bashes out some solid riffs to veer this side of the century divide (think Placebo covering The Human League). One slightly-less 80s derivative is 'Endless Blue' which thrusts the band into romantic shoegazing. The lyrics are typically vague ("you're never certain of anything unless you go in") but it seems unlikely that most listeners would care over those guitars. By 'Dive In' the album begins to feel a little bit of a compilation - the band's impression of so many different genres and generations - because this is unapologetically Britpop. Sounding a little bit like a Suede track dragged out, it's quite easily my least favourite track (and I'm a huge Suede fan) because it feels so out of place.

Especially when 'Still Life' follows. Faris Badwan is at his most clear vocally here and it's quite easy to see why it was chosen as lead single, when it's as bold and straightforward as... don't take this as an insult... Electric Light Orchestra. 'Wild Eyed' follows; an inoffensive little track with a little repetitive but pleasant rhythm. Again the lyrics are cliché: secrets and lies are mentioned, along with a desire to float away. But with a backdrop as picturesque as these on show it's difficult not to get caught up in the serenity. Having dabbled liberally with krautrock in the first half of the album, the Horrors indulge us with 'Moving Further Away' which, at over 8 minutes long, is as electronically charged as a Kraftwerk show.

At last a glimmer of the 2007 generic indie flicks appears on 'Monica Gems' and whilst the bassline is safe enough to secure them NME's support, it's the minor attention to detail (such as the bells throughout, or the chorus' experimental guitars) that injects something special here. Any sceptics should be left answered with closing track 'Oceans Burning', though, a quiet and suggestive piece that echoes and rattles as an entirely uncertifiable entity.

However much you could immerse yourself in claims of a lack of originality about the band, they've clearly found a sound that they're fans of and extenuated those claims with a brilliantly-crafted and cohesive album. It's a little too aesthetic for me to endure anything beyond a brief flirtation, especially since I'm a fan of many artists they're pastiching (Echo and the Bunnymen, Simple Minds), but in a musical environment where bands experiment clumsily and often fail, the Horrors have pulled off a faultless album.

Rating: 8/10
Highlights: Oceans Burning, Moving Further Away, Still Life, Endless Blue, I Can See Through You, Wild Eyed
Avoid: Dive In

Artwork Watch: THERE ARE COLOURS, MANY OF THEM, AND EACH OF THEM PRETTY.

Cat's Eyes - Cat's Eyes

2011-07-12T23:39:00.004+01:00

Sideprojects. Mostly fun, often a little disappointing compared to their day job, and in the most famous cases a little bit frustrating (Last Shadow Puppets, Beady Eye, Kele Okereke and Brandon Flowers' solo albums). They've also got a bit of a tendency to revel in some classical influences - and this is certainly the case here. Frontman of The Horrors, Faris Badwan, has teamed up with Canadian-Italian Rachel Zeffira to form one of the most common outfit types: the boy/girl duo. Indeed, with such recent domineers as Cults, (the main force of) Bodies of Water and jj, it's beginning to feel like a gimmick - an immediately cute default that can quickly conjure twenty rumours a day of "are they a couple?" or "which one's the creative force?"

Here at GSA Reviews we consider ourselves a little above such personal shit, so let's dive in to the album. It follows an EP released in February (just a month or so before the release of this), which gathered a little positive press - and a performance at the Vatican certainly helped:

...performed their first gig last December at St. Peter’s Basilica, which if you don’t know is where the Pope lives. According to a press release received by Pitchfork, the show was attended by “seven high-ranking cardinals,”...

What better way to kick off an album called Cat's Eyes by a band called Cat's Eyes than with a track called 'Cat's Eyes'? Well a better track might be one. It's immediately tinged with Spector pastiches that're a little predictable, but the clash of the pair's voices makes for something original - Zeffira like the Ronnettes to Badwan's best Lou Reed impression. Unfortunately with little to work with musically, they get a bit tangled. On 'The Best Person I Know' there's some distant whispers about how amazing you are, that's all twilit and pretty, but not much else.

However there's a more careful and imaginative orchestration to 'I'm Not Stupid' that feels like a Janelle Monae ballad done by the Carpenters - Zeffira morosely sighs "I know I'm not a pretty girl/ Be realistic/ I know, I know/ 'Cause I'm not stupid". 'Face in the Crowd' is a lavish amalgamation of Tarantino-spitting Western influences and Bond-theme-aspirational theatricality, that sounds camper on paper than it really is (think Edwyn Collins' A Girl Like You). The lyrics go a little off on 'Not A Friend' ("You might think that your lies are kind but they just stink") but backed by a slow rock and roll classic rhythm it twirls around satisfyingly.

A whistle, horns and whip sounds appear on 'Bandit' giving it a bit of a "late submission to the Kill Bill soundtrack / alternative "Canyonero!" advertising" feel. Perhaps the most unsettling experience, 'Sooner or Later' feels like Nick Cave trying to extract a kidney stone. Background swells and strings dive at you almost at random, with harsher electronic effects to make you squirm further. Provocative, certainly, but a tad self-indulgent I feel. 'The Lull' returns to the Ronnettes sampling with some rich instrumentation and further shoegazing vocals; with its title it feels like an anaesthetic for the sudden jolt that's 'Over You' - which thrusts shrill strings tunes and a disco-pop rhythm for maximum sway-along potential. 'I Knew It Was Over' is a gorgeously pretty track (the one performed above at the Vatican) with a rather conventional piano tune and swelling echoes for a bit of a predictable (but cute) swansong.

It's basically a nice little venture if you can't be bothered to dig up some Shirelles or Ronnettes tracks. There's nothing really here to get caught up about, no new genres exposed or fascinating wordplay, it's just retropop with a little bit of shoegazing - not exactly something we're in scarce supply of at the moment.

Rating: 6/10
Highlights: Face In The Crowd, Not A Friend, I Knew It Was Over, Bandit, I'm Not Stupid
Avoid: Cat's Eyes, Sooner or Later

Artwork Watch: Distorted font, a lot of black, no eye contact with the camera. OH THE PRETENSION.

Dionne Bromfield - Good For The Soul

2011-07-11T19:15:00.004+01:00

Those who are unaware as to just how this young lady got a record deal need only hear: Amy Winehouse is her godmother (I know! Her! An authority figure!) She released an album of cover versions of soul standards (Mama Said, Ain't No Mountain High Enough) in 2009, Introducing Dionne Bromfield, that I completely ignored because I'm bored of people covering such tracks (great as they are). Skip two years and she's finally got her own stuff in motion, or rather a team of people's stuff. But those hoping for someone as uniquely spectacular as godmum Amy should probably look elsewhere.

In the age of child stars such as... um... I should probably pay more attention to Britain's Got Talent... and it's unfair to say Justin Bieber or Rebecca Black. But yes, there appears to be a zeitgeist where any kid with a decent set of lungs is immediately heralded as a marvellous talent in lieu of songwriting ability or unique star quality.

Don't get me wrong, she has a lovely voice for a 15 year old. There are moments of genuine maturity and subtle twangs that most adults are unable to pull off - and I guess it's a little bit foolish to expect anything more than this - but I think my frustration with artists of this like is the way they're marketed. "She is known for her unique style of music", her Wikipedia boasts. Yet off the top of my head I'd immediately list off Gabriella Cilmi, the Noisettes, Amy Winehouse, Duffy, Beverly Knight, Paloma Faith...

On tracks such as 'Yeah Right' however she establishes a bit of a niche: combining the pop sensibilities of modern music (it features Diggy Simmons, son of Rev Run) it serves multiple hooks (backing vocal hums, easily memorable lyrics) and kicks off the album well. It's on the more upbeat Motown revivals that she flourishes, and the record feels its most fun - 'Sweetest Thing' brings out the brass and an uplifting chorus for as feelgood an anthem as any of her contemporaries or influences. Even the Mark Ronson production qualities trickle into tracks like 'Ouch That Hurt', but given this formula is tried and tested as a successful one, why not? With last year's successes for the likes of Eliza Doolittle, tracks such as 'A Little Love' aren't surprising inclusions - this one is quite easily the strongest and catchiest, and you'd have to be stonefaced not to find it at least nice.

But there are moments where she tries to turn down the mood-lighting: second single 'Foolin'' sounds almost too mature for her age (although given the exploits of most 15 year olds today I'm perhaps exaggerating) and there's a nagging feeling that she's imitating the Winehouse. There are a couple of attempts at other genre pastiches that're a little too shallow - 'Time Will Tell' is a reggae-pop offering that sounds like Paloma's "Upside Down" without the energy. She truly engages the teens on 'Get Over It' ("you're staring at your phone all day waiting for a text to come from a boy that barely knows your name, but you think that he's the one") and it's again difficult to gauge: it's either cute and young or mature and generic.

The final few tracks are capable but could really be cut from the record and noone would notice. 'Don't Make It True' would serve well as a single, though, and has a nice summery vibe to it, and it's a wise decision to end on 'Move A Little Faster' which takes a leaf out of the pages of VV Brown and Janelle Monae for an unstoppable party vibe. Despite all of my earlier complaints I guess I should be thankful that someone with at least one talent is getting a bit of attention (fuck off, J-Lo) but I'd like to hear soul songs from someone who's actually endured a bit of experience first.

Rating: 6/10
Highlights: A Little Love, Don't Make It True, Yeah Right, Sweetest Thing, Move A Little Faster, Ouch That Hurt
Avoid: Too Soon to Call It Love, Get Over It, Foolin', Time Will Tell, In Your Own World

Artwork Watch: It's her. Nothing else to say. Why are you reading this?

WU LYF - Go Tell Fire to the Mountain

2011-07-06T16:52:00.002+01:00

Most new bands today are faced with the difficulty in establishing their name and identity, and most ways in doing such often involve an excruciating "Hi we're from ____, we like ____, this is Dave on drums". Not for World Unite! Lucifer Youth Foundation, though, who have been a little bit eccentric in their quest to stardom: their Facebook manager is 'War God', they self-produced this record in a church and it took a while for even the band members' names to filter through. Whether this was all a gimmick or not, it's worked, and they find themselves with some rather weighty support.

So, pointer #1 for the uniquity column? Well there's Ellery Roberts' voice. Somewhere inbetween MGMT-modern psychedelia and Bruce Springsteen, it takes a while to adjust to. Must kill his throat though, poor guy. From start to finish the roar-pop is a little bit manic, but behind all of that there're bounteous sublime moments. Opener 'L Y F' combines some steel drums with a church organ for a cacophony of summery sounds, and it all feels surprisingly stadium-bound. Shoegaze'o'clock on 'Cave Song', it sounds like The Cure's "Lovesong" covered by the Gaslight Anthem... doesn't quite work for me.

It's a rare miss, though. 'Such A Sad Puppy Dog' is a serene organ meditation that launches into solemn march-drums and desperate vocals - by the end it'll be a miracle if the puppy dog hasn't topped himself. So 'Summas Bliss' comes as a bit of a sunbathing-in-the-Caribbean experience, but the drums from Joe Manning restrain it from getting too comfortable. For me the apex of the album is 'We Bros', all cymbals and generic-indie-pop that somehow sounds fresh: whether that's something in the production remains to be seen, but there's something Empire of the Sun about the track (a simile I use often for "really bloody good").

There's then a bit of repeat-for-effect about 'Spitting Blood'. All primal energy and obvious graphic imagery, it's difficult to ignore in amongst some of their more innocent offerings. The kick-drums on 'Dirt' make it one of the catchiest tracks, and the vocals are pointedly more decipherable here - indeed the unintelligible nature of the majority of the lyrics is another setback. It's difficult to really describe or relate tracks like 'Concrete Gold' to any preexisting notion of music you already have, as hard as Pitchfork or NME will try with silly metaphors and vague assertions - so I'll say it's quite bloody good. At times it does feel like the hype here is unjustifiable; the band are frustratingly unwilling to bend to conventions and that can, in itself, smack of wannabe-rebellion (see: Odd Future).

But with the final two tracks there is a little glimpse of the band putting down the smoke and mirrors act and just revelling in their own niche. '14 Crowns For Me & Your Friends' is gorgeously accented and has some life-affirming riffs in there that're easy to get immersed in, but it's closing track 'Heavy Pop', with its patient introduction and almost-tamed vocals that acts as a counter-balance to the rest of the album's disorienting shrieks. It's weird, because I come across as critical here, but I think the final track just serves as the alka-seltzer for the headache of the 9 previous.

But don't get me wrong, I enjoy the other nine (Cave Song aside). I think I should be careful to write off someone so willing to try something new and different, and this album is both. I struggle to see just who, in real life, is going to even find about this though, and that's the frustrating thing about bands like these - they're huge for about a week on Pitchfork and are then mostly forgotten. I guess, though, that's for a different ranting post altogether, because what's here is a relatively enjoyable album. I'm not convinced it'll change anything, though.

Rating: 7/10
Highlights: We Bros, Summas Bliss, L Y F, Heavy Pop, Dirt
Avoid: Cave Song

Artwork Watch: HIPSTER ALERT.

The Feeling - Together We Were Made

2011-07-05T19:31:00.004+01:00

Those looking for something dark and daring would be foolish to come to this band, so it's with some surprise that you continue to read slating reviews about them - particularly from the NME, whose criteria for a good album is how shaggable the lead singer is, and who's heard of it. Because the Feeling have never been cool or indie, they've always been on the Scouting For Girls, Hoosiers side of things and whilst I loathe those two bands entirely, there's something endearing and likeable about Dan Gillespie Sells and co. Singles such as 'Fill My Little World' and 'Sewn' have been pretty great pop songs in the past, and 'Rosé' is a favourite if ignoring the subject matter.

However, it's a little surprising that they've endured to a third album, even ignoring the impressive chart positions of the first two (#2 and #1 respectively). Considering their sound has varied little, 'Set My World On Fire' doesn't come as a shock as the first single or opening track. Complete with a singalong chorus, it dances around in circles and for me it's all just a bit wet. It's certainly lovely and inevitably made the BBC Radio 2 audiences happy, but I very much doubt its longevity. Things go a bit mental in 'Dance for the Lights', which features eternally-cool Róisín Murphy with a jerky electronic rhythm and summer-barbecque at G-A-Y atmosphere.

But then the serious strings shtick falls into place on 'Another Soldier' with lyrics such as "another mistake, another heartache, you feel the blood in your veins getting colder". A slightly triphop beat persists underneath all of this which is again a bit of a culture shock for them, but the lyrics just don't make any sense. 'Leave Me Out Of It' features Sells' wife Sophie Ellis-Bextor and is one of the stronger tracks courtesy of its musical-showtune nature (slightly reminiscent of his soundtrack for the BBC2 comedy Beautiful People, which was just amazing) and 'na-na-na!' chorus. Cutesy instrumental inclusions make 'Build a Home' equally difficult-to-hate, but is spent waiting for the real song to actually start.

'Searched Every Corner' sounds a little bit like Owl City remixed by David Guetta (a matter of time, surely) and despite that harrowing prospect, is a pretty uplifting little nugget in a wash of misguided seriousness. A bit of ragtime is indulged in on 'A Hundred Sinners (Come And Get It)', a clear Goodbye Yellow Brick Road derivative with an extra dollop of sugar. 'Mr Grin' activates my OCD sensors with its lack of punctuation, but that's about all it can get out of me; a pretty slick but uneventful honky-tonk-pop offering. A nice piano tune sums up 'Say No' and it's quite faultless. 'Back Where I Came From' however sounds like the concept of Space Oddity done by Kajagoogoo, it's so laden with 80s squelching effects, silly echos and beeps. Guitars burst out of nowhere but if anything just heap on the absurdity.

If you haven't already got a toothache, 'Another Life's intro will surely finish you off. Ignoring that brief moments however, it's a solid and undeniably cute track and one of the best they've done yet. 'Love and Care' is equally difficult to write off entirely, employing its Scissor Sisters vibes with ease (but accidentally treading a little too close to the band's "Land of a Thousand Words" in the process). Final track (including the hidden 'Hardest Stone') 'Undeniable' feels like an obvious attempt at a Queen-style showstopper that is neither convincing nor majestic enough to pull it off. Everything down to the repeat of the album's title feels forced and contrived, it's just bogus. 'Hardest Stone' is an acoustic guitar track. 'Nuff said.

Of course it's difficult for a band who're continually branded as happy-go-lucky one trick ponies to be rebutted every time they attempt something a little bit sinister or depressing, but here the attempts are just embarrassing. There's also a bit of a gap in the number of catchy-enough-to-be-a-single tracks, so all in all it's a bit of a collective step down for the band I'm afraid. That said, there are some cute tracks, some interesting new ground for them, and to totally write it off reeks of pretention.

Rating: 4.5/10
Highlights: Another Life, A Hundred Sinners (Come And Get It), Leave Me Out Of It, Say No, Searched Every Corner
Avoid: Another Soldier, Mr Grin, Back Where I Came From
Artwork Watch: I have nothing interesting to say about this.

Emmy the Great - Virtue

2011-06-27T17:18:00.003+01:00

Hailing from Hong Kong and located now in London, Emma-Lee Moss has now released her sophomore album despite not really being a name I've heard of. Whether I've been living under a very large music-based rock or not is irrelevant: the songstress is of the perennially difficult-to-pinpoint "anti-folk" genre (where recent carriers of the same banner have varied from Kate Nash to Laura Marling) that basically means "she gets political over some strings".

But then from time to time the politics takes a backseat whilst we sing about 'Dinosaur Sex', to borrow the European Union's motto. The track thrives off a quiet, echoing twang that builds a bizarre and ethereal atmosphere - whilst Moss sings "dinosaur sex led to nothing, and we will lead to nothing". An ominous tone about the insignificance of humanity in the greater scheme of things there, but it conjures mental images of pterodactyls in fun positions, so it's forgiven. The recent years haven't exactly been reluctant to throw Kate Bush-inspired indie pop at us: and 'A Woman, A Woman, A Century of Sleep' could quite conceivably belong to Bat For Lashes or Marina and the Diamonds. Everything, from the choral chants in the background to the multi-layered instrumentations, screams "unoriginal" but it happens to be a sound I'm particularly fond of: I think, to Emmy's credit, she has taken it in a slightly more conventional direction (which Bush fans would naturally spit at) with accessible riffs.

The intro to 'Iris' sounded a tiny bit like Duran Duran's 'Rio' and with its bassline and drum rhythms it's almost as catchy. Understandably released as the first single, it touches upon the age-old complaint of indecision:

Princess impermanent,
princess always looking for the next result
And when they serve you it
don’t you always wish that you had something else?

In 'Paper Forest (In The Afterglow Of Rapture)' however there's a little more uplifting message (the chorus crows "I'm blessed just to be, no more or less") - whilst the strings swell and exhale with a slight pomposity. However this is quickly tarnished with the line "Now you're standing in the afterglow of rapture, but there is no rapture left", which carries a bit of weight bearing in mind the recent split from Moss' fiancé. 'Cassandra' however takes on a Roman à clef: "I know it's awful, I know it's bruising,/ I know you can't see past the conclusion/ but still the world turns upon its axis/ and we make circles so we can match it".

'Creator' has obvious religious undertones (carrying on from the Rapture) that are purportedly about the ex-fiancé's sudden desire to search for God. Quite a clever track, it takes on a doubtful mantle to explain her frustrations despite being of a non-believer stance. From my perspective anyway. Her voice is at its finest on 'Sylvia', one of the catchiest tracks with an almost Florence + the Machine backdrop, as she sings "And tell me if my character is fate/ Do I confine myself til I find a way to dream us all awake?" On 'Exit Night / Juliet's Theme' there's some lovely lyrics ("taillights they circle like the roses of an infinite bouquet") about urbanisation and its fatal side-effects, but is a little unadventurous in terms of instrumentation or sequences.

'North' returns to a slightly sinister atmosphere coping with rejection and the idea of paradise (yes, that Christian one) - "they die to be born" could just about briskly underline any religious nutter though. The tragedy of lyrics like "I'm a relic of a love gone by/ kneeling to address the sky" in 'Trellick Tower' are a solid reminder though of how personal and emotional this entire album is. Set idyllically over a contemplative piano piece (think Lily Allen's "Littlest Things" with a bit of poetry), it gives an otherwise allegorical and empowering album a little bit of a defeatist attitude. "Praying and I don't know why" could of course serve as a cynical mockery quite ably but I don't think that's the intention with the atmosphere the music's thrown up.

Aside from that ending, the album is full of refreshingly uplifting and bluntly emotional soul-searching that, with the help of a knack for some really great tunes, pulls off the remarkable feat of standing out in a crowd of Esben and the Witches.

Rating: 7/10
Highlights: Paper Forest (In The Afterglow Of Rapture), Iris, North, Sylvia, Trellick Tower
Avoid: n/a
Artwork Watch: Could quite easily be Roger Hargreaves' "Little Miss Nostalgia".

The Antlers - Burst Apart

2011-06-24T16:45:00.004+01:00

This is another of my "dive in head-first" posts that'll probably fail to register with the enduring fans of this band, so apologies in advance to those who'd question my knowledge of The Antlers' discography. The band, now on their fourth album, are located in Brooklyn and have spent the past couple of years opening for The National and gathering some of that all-important critical buzz. This, their second record to get over 8/10 on Pitchfork, should go some way in being rather decent indeed.

From first impressions that would be the correct judgment. Opener 'I Don't Want Love' is a quiet, moody indie-folk piece that puts out slightly ominous lyrics like "Keep your prison locked up/ And I will leave my gun at home" over a deceivingly content instrumentation that draws inspiration from contemporaries such as Deerhunter or Bon Iver. 'French Exit' continues this kind-of anti-ballad approach with the closing line "I'm not a puppy you'll take home/ Don't bother trying to fix my heart". The music is all ambient and lovely and cute (dare I say Cults?) and very much my thing.

Things then get a bit intense with 'Parentheses' with a strong reverberating drumbeat intro, with shrill vocals and beeps making it a distinct Portishead influence. There's a slightly tenuous link between brackets and a gap~in~the~heart but the falsettos almost give the impression that the lyrics aren't really that important, or at least not as important as their knack for eerie atmospherics. Certainly the crows in the chorus to 'No Widows' reiterate this, but lyrically this is a masterclass: "If I'm stuck out here alone/ If I'm stranded here all year/ Just nothing left at home/ No widows disappear". Hinting at the insignificance of life, the track is definitely an emotional peak for the band (although, of course, that's a little bit of an empty observation for someone who only knows this album).

'Rolled Together' has an immediate "ooh it's obviously about marijuana" vibe that's not exactly dispelled with its extremely blissful ambience and good-enough-for-M&S-adverts riff loop - think along the lines of Jakatta or Air. The strongest Radiohead influence is on 'Every Night My Teeth Are Falling Out': the meaning of it is pretty much lost on me, and that's from someone who's lost a tooth on a night out before. It begins all folksy but crescendos with some heavy (The Bends) riffs that add to the hysteria. It's not really a favourite of mine, but it's different. 'Tiptoe' returns to the ambience with a (not sure if intentional) melody similar to Muse's Knights of Cydonia.

'Hounds' sounds like Bloc Party at their very best moments of sitting-in-a-summery-field atmospherics (see: So Here We Are) and even introduces some trumpets with minimal menace; a true romantic disposed against "they want to think for you/ pour drinks for you" opportunists and sleazeballs. 'Corsicana' references to a town in Texas where a father killed his own children: lyrically it draws from this idea with the theme of dying together. "We lost our chance to run/ Now the door's too hot to touch/ We should hold our breath with mouths together now". The real emotional punch though is final track 'Putting the Dog to Sleep', which laments "Well my trust in you/ Is a dog with a broken leg/ Tendons too torn to beg/ For you to let me back in". "I'm not gonna die alone", Peter Silberman cries repeatedly over an almost Wall of Sound orchestration.

After the themes dealt with on Burst Apart you'd be forgiven for feeling a little melancholy; but the band have a surprising knack for snatching victory from the jaws of defeat. Even though dying alone is dealt with on the closing track, they vow to "wipe blood off your paws". Even though they're dying in 'Corsicana', they're together. Whilst there are moments of true despair (No Widows), the whole album to me feels like light at the end of the tunnel, if you'll excuse an obvious metaphor. "If you're going through Hell, keep going" indeed.

Rating: 8.5/10
Highlights: No Widows, Putting the Dog to Sleep, Corsicana, Hounds, I Don't Want Love
Avoid: Every Night My Teeth Are Falling Out
Artwork Watch: A sexual encounter with Jackson Pollock in a copse.

Wiley - 100% Publishing

2011-06-23T06:33:00.004+01:00

Although the commercial story might put across Wiley as something of a recent hitmaker (bursting into pop knowledge with 2008's "Wearing My Rolex"), the grime artist has been around for over a decade. Forming the collective Roll Deep in 2002 with a few notable members such as Skepta, Dizzee Rascal and Tinchy Stryder, the group have enjoyed success with great singles such as "The Avenue" and not-so-great recent #1s "Green Light" and "Good Times". Of course, such recent pop sensibilities have drawn a great deal of criticism from hishttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gif contemporaries, suggesting he'd sold out: indeed he regards his 2008 record 'See Clear Now', which spawned Rolex, 'Cash in my Pocket' and 'Summertime', as one he's "disowned".

In 2009 he clawed back some fans with 'Race Against Time' - but this year sees an ambitious two albums released from the man. 100% Publishing is the first, released this week, and has already gained some attention thanks to lead single Numbers in Action and its funky video. Such viral pursuits are referenced in opener 'Information Age' where everything from the music industry to the couch-potato mentality of today are savaged: "The industry has seen much better days, my patience is wearing thinner".

Certainly any signs of a commercial sound are MIA - the title track combines a rather classic jungle/grime beat, and whilst there are some minor diversions in the tune, the focus is on Wiley himself: "Make a silly move, career ending, I'm an avatar when I'm airbending" he jokes whilst making some rather existential points about the difficulty of breaking various audiences ("I know some don't care about the grime scene but I'm gonna 'til I die", "Nobody knows if it's gonna work overseas, but you wait, I'm gonna try") - but he asserts confidence on 'Numbers in Action': "to get it right, I know it's all about timing." Understandably the first single with its catchy chorus hooks and flows, it's a step away from the electro-house of most mainstream urban artists that's welcome respite.

A circus introduction to 'Boom Boom Da Na' kicks off a more grimy sound and is a very quickfire track - the chorus is a little dollop of silly onamatopoeia but oh well. "I'm bang bang but my name ain't Chitty" he announces on 'Your Intuition' with a chorus that laments some poor past decisions - indeed "I'm real and so's my collective" seems to shrug off some of the Rolex worries. 'I Just Woke Up' doesn't really have much of a resonant message and whilst there're fast beats on show it feels a wasted track ("I'm awake now, reading the Sun newspaper, 25p I'm a saver"...) I guess you could make a point about laziness and its infiltration into commercialism and entertainment but it's a bit of a stretch (yawn) when the chorus relies on a yawning trick. A pleasant piano tune to 'Wise Man And His Words' is always going to please me, and Wiley again addresses his artistic conflicts: "That's why I made two albums, 'cos I've got two fanbases, not one".

Just which one this is comes under fire occasionally thanks to the commercial leanings of tracks like 'Talk About Life' and 'Up There'. The former has a kinda Bruno Mars vibe about it thanks to the pleasant-but-dull guest feature from Daniel de Bourgh, whereas the latter thrives off a nice tune. 'Yonge Street (1,178 Miles Long)' however focuses on a less mainstream instrumentation with slick vocals. Just what they're about is a little puzzling, though. 'Pink Lady' has a strong jungle beat and whilst songs about admiring women aren't entirely exciting, it's got enough of a tune to carry it for a brief charm. 'One Hit Wonder' is probably the only case where a bit of eurodance filters in, but it's the slightest of drops and the focus on its other aspects gives it a great kick - a mixture of humour ("you wanna mumble your words? Fair enough"), ambition ("I won't hit once, 'cos I'm not a one hit wonder"), mundanity ("hit the Macbook, open a file") that all combines and gives Wiley an unmistakable individuality.

"My work ain't over" he reaffirms in 'To Be Continued', "I wonder when I'm gonna burn out, but I keep on going like Duracell batteries". It's certainly said convincingly but is a little bit repetitive to me for some reason. Finally 'Music Not the Money' has a child-hook chorus that hammers home its title with as much subtlety as Janet Street Porter, that it accidentally comes off as false - but it's a cute sentiment nonetheless. Because whether or not there's some cynicism about going all "music, not the money", it's certainly a noble message to put across. The majority of the album does certainly argue the former - and whilst there are moments where you wonder if a track's been designed for the money, he's got 5 times as many to reassure you where his heart lies.

Rating: 7/10
Highlights: One Hit Wonder, Numbers in Action, Your Intuition, Wise Man and His Words, Up There
Avoid: Pink Lady, Talk About Life
Artwork Watch: It's the back of a head. You try coming up with something interesting to say about that.

Bodies of Water - Twist Again

2011-06-22T04:46:00.003+01:00

The side-project of David and Meredith Metcalf, Music go Music, was a total accidental find for me. I think one of their tracks might have been in a Q radar thing or something - but it sparked an intense love affair with their album Expressions being a triumphant mixture of folk-rock and ABBA-inspired pop tunes that I've played endless times - I'd really recommend that album, or in the very least this track.

Bodies of Water however are their main venture. Their third album now, they've picked up a little buzz thanks to some courteous reviews from Pitchfork and the Independent - and whilst there's the departure of founding members Kyle Gladden and Jessie Conklin to mourn, there's a real sense that the band are a community spirit (in the same vein as Arcade Fire or the Leisure Society (a band I coincidentally found at the exact same time as Music go Music).) The duo at the core of the group are also expecting, which proffers all sorts of "new chapter" analogies that I can't be bothered to call upon.

Opener 'One Hand Loves the Other' may make an immediate nod to the artwork but it's a very tentative track musically. Instruments are implemented sparingly and carefully, building to a nuanced experience that for me has yet to click, even with Meredith in her best Karen Carpenter-alike stance. The cogs suddenly disintegrate with 'Triplets', a track as classically Motown as they come with its fun beats - which continue into 'Mary, Don't You Weep', a generous slice of 60s country-pop that Nancy Sinatra might have been quite proud of; there's a modern twist inevitably in that the electronic rhythms underneath are deliciously catchy, blending sublimely with the horns in the foreground.

A mellow introduction to 'Open Rhythms' however places violins against early Fleetwood Mac guitars, and it's a nice and quiet track throughout, but I think could do with some better vocals (whether lyrically or vocally I'm undecided). 'Rise Up, Careful' is equally moody with its clunky opening and morose vocals, but a ragtime rhythm kicks in halfway through and injects a bit of energy, taking the band down a slightly Dolly Parton, slightly Martha and the Vandellas route. A chipper piano introduction, 'Ever With Us' is probably the most eclectically-inspired, with trumpets, background vocals (Oooo!), strings and a prominent male vocal (for a change). The retro vibes continue into 'Like A Stranger', a little similar to Franz Ferdinand's third album (though Mr. Metcalf's vocal similarities to Alex Kapranos might be the cause of this observation).

'Lights Out Forever' will come as quite a shock to those who have heard 'Explorers of the Heart' or 'Just Me' - a trumpet pipes, subdued, perhaps by Meredith's beautifully sad vocal. The track sort of continues into 'New Age Nightmare' (although with David on vocal duty) before suddenly turning into a horseback chase halfway throughout with distorted horns and haunting background vocals. Never fear though, 'In Your Thrall' is sure to cheer us up a bit. A rapid reimagining of 'Open Rhythms' it serves well as a mood-lifter but I think they could've got away with ending on a dark note (thus paving the way for Music Go Music 2, admittedly). 'My Hip Won't Let Me' hints at caution and lack of direction, giving the band another Fleetwood Mac vibe (though not one that's healthy, surely) - "I'm leaning towards chaos now" they muse, as though unsatisfied with day-to-day events. They finish with 'You Knew Me So Well' which is a bit soppy ("Remember when you gave me your pillow?" is a genuine lyric) but I like soppy.

For me the first two records were a little difficult to get into. Perhaps as a fan of their more bombastic side-project I was hesitant to turn to a more chilled, mellow atmosphere - but here they're at arguably their most quiet and morose. But with such classical inspirations and Meredith's beautiful voice it's all pulled off ably - and there's a gorgeous selection of songs as a result.

Rating: 8/10
Highlights: Rise Up Careful, Mary Don't You Weep, You Knew Me So Well, Like A Stranger, In Your Thrall Again
Avoid: One Hand Loves the Other
Artwork Watch: Reminds me of those oddballs who go to yoga classes at the village hall every Thursday, and tried tantric sex once but decided it was just too weird. Or a pair of hands. Not exactly Michelangelo though. Then again, comparing all artwork to Michelangelo will leave me perpetually disappointed.

Kaiser Chiefs - The Future is Medieval

2011-06-21T19:55:00.006+01:00

It's difficult to put myself into a frame of mind where I write about the Kaiser Chiefs with poise and grace, because the vast majority of their back catalogue has irritated the fuck out of me. Their brand of pub-rock spawned a number of hit singles with the same indisputable formula: midtempo rock + choruses where the line is repeated. "I predict a riot! Oh my God I can't believe it! Ruby Ruby Ruby Ruby!" In addition to this the band have now gone down the fanciful "go on, pick your own" route which suggests a slightly haphazard approach - almost careless, really. And then there were the rumours that they'd rejected David Bowie lyrics, only to emerge as a totally false story. So yeah. Not my favourite band.

Their fourth studio album, The Future is Medieval is supposedly influenced by Oasis' Be Here Now:

"We all know that record has loads of problems, but at least it's got an attitude, unlike the twee and boring folk music that's so popular at the moment"
- Nick Hodgson, drummer and songwriter

"Twee and boring folk music" assumedly meaning the likes of Bon Iver and Fleet Foxes, or actual artists if you will. Moving on from my sly digs - opening track 'Little Shocks' sounds rather a lot like Oasis rivals Blur's 'Stereotypes' with its background organ hooks and foreground britpop twangs. It's relatively inoffensive but is neither catchy enough to last nor clever enough to listen out for the lyrics ("everything will be explained in the diaries, especially the latter part." Indeed.) Things all of a sudden go indie-pop with 'Things Change', where a disco-funk inspired bassline plays tricks and gives the band an air of cool. Quite a feat. The vocals are spat with a hint of Gary Numan too, which is always cool.

'Long Way From Celebrating' again plays on some nice bass licks but the chorus is far too blustery by contrast, as though a tsunami disrupting your sunbathing. 'Starts With Nothing' has a staccato rhythm and sound that indeed suggests inspiration from Oasis - a dizzying piano tune underlies it all but never goes anywhere thanks to some dud lyrics ("Yes that is my final answer!" is repeated, as if the catchphrase from Who Wants to be a Millionaire? was an interesting lyric). "It's not entertaining being entertaining", Ricky Wilson complains in 'Out of Focus', as if he'd know. The track drags heavily but there are some interesting electronic pieces that give it some gusto.

The bluster is much more convincing and enrapturing in 'Dead Or In Serious Trouble', with a pirate-chant vocal and crashes all around, a slight Quadrophenia influence evident. An Eleanor Rigby introduction to 'When All is Quiet' is as if the classic Beatles track were recorded by the Kinks instead: it's pretty decent indeed, and falsetto harmonies throughout make it by far the strongest. The version I have is missing track 8, 'Kinda Girl You Are', so make your minds up on that one yourselves - 'Man on Mars' however has a repeated hook that's difficult to fight off. Again, the lyrics are pretty random, but the guitar solos are able to stand on their own two feet and succeed.

'Child of the Jago' is one of the strongest Oasis inspirations with its dark tones and prominent riffs; Wilson even at times emulates Gallagher the Liam - but the lyrics and progression are nowhere near in his league. There's an obligatory electronic one in 'Heard it Break' which is about broken hearts. Aaaaw. The track is actually pretty subversive for them, for the casual observer at least. The chorus has shades of Metronomy about it, which is very much en vogue lately. 'Coming Up For Air' has a typically Oasis rhythm and melody which is never a bad sound to aim for - a piano tune floats along nicely, the lyrics talk about "five-a-side"s and some pretty clumsy "fuck off, yeah?" musings, but again the music speaks for itself. Finally, 'If You Will Have Me', an acoustic (!) piece from Nick Baines, is a magnificent surprise: strings and bleakly revelatory lyrics sign things off triumphantly (although quite where this musically ties in with the rest of the album is a good point indeed).

I guess there's a major risk in this approach - but you have to give the band credit for experimenting with a variety of styles. Although you could claim they're tring to please everyone ahead of finding themselves musically, and that this album lacks something in the way of a theme or cohesion, the piecemeal approach actually works for me (but then I was never a fan of their usual sound). If they could now get a good lyricist we might be going places.

Rating: 6.5/10
Highlights: If You Will Have Me, When All Is Quiet, Heard it Break, Man on Mars, Out of Focus, Coming Up For Air
Avoid: Starts With Nothing, Little Shocks, Child of the Jago, Long Way From Celebrating
Artwork Watch: OBSOLETE, because of a "choose your own" policy. I'd assess each one but that'd be silly.

Bad Meets Evil - Hell: The Sequel

2011-06-16T19:54:00.003+01:00

After a much-publicised feud lasting the entirety of the 2000s, Royce da 5'9" and Eminem's reconciliation, following the death of D12 member Proof, has led to a touch of maturity and putting grudges aside. The cynic in me would suggest that with this ageing has come a decline in the energy but there's something quite lovely about the ridiculous pantomime of the hip hop universe putting differences aside; sadly, none of that loveliness has made it onto this EP.

Because whilst they have matured in age, Eminem's turn to poppier tracks in recent years (Love the Way You Lie, We Made You and I Need A Doctor) has come with a notable decline in quality. Perhaps there could be a case made for the fact that, now in a third decade of production, there's nothing left that's interesting to say. This much is evident with the cheap shots at peers and other musicians throughout the record, and various empty misogynist and homophobic slurs are spat with no real intention other than for attention.

Throughout the record there's a kind of empty-church sound quality to the tunes and background noises - the child's choir gently "aaah"ing in 'Welcome 2 Hell' does well to initiate a bit of atmosphere but by 'The Reunion' the tension and screams become laughable. Hazardous production choices aside, Eminem and Royce are able to spit lyrics in equally good stance with their career highs. Suggesting that "Bad and Evil" are "also known as Saddam and Osama Bin", Eminem then dabbles in a couple of recent highly-publicised (and sensitive) sexual metaphors - "My god, what I mean is, David Carradine jacking his penis in front of his tripod/ Choking his own neck, what part you don't get?" - that doesn't really serve any purpose other than shock tactics. First single 'Fast Lane' has them at their quickest delivery and newcomers to Royce's rapping (such as myself) will be surprised to find someone able to compete with Mathers. The track's tune and beats are a little bit damp though.

As mentioned, the introduction to 'The Reunion' with screams and a twee xylophone tune is a little bit ridiculous. Eminem revives the typical "bitch, I will hit you" act that has been done time and time again and with no real clever wordplay or interest. He says 'cunt' though, and that's, like, shocking and stuff. "The poor get poorer, the rich get rich - it's just so disproportionate" muses Claret Jai for one of the album's simplest and political points, whilst Bad Meets Evil work their best to try and spin up a bit of venom when really Eminem is just shouting. Again, Royce (to me) impresses but that may just be because I'm totally unaware of his previous discography. It's a slightly predictable but solid and decent track. Comedian and actor Mike Epps makes an appearance on 'I'm On Everything' which has the audacity to put out tongue-blowing and fart noises. It's a pretty annoying track, like childish taunts about how famous they all are.

On 'A Kiss' there's the obligatory Lady GaGa diss ("I wouldn't fuck her with her dick") that's neither big nor clever. The tune and beats are pretty decent here and the pair again are impeccable in their delivery, so it's a step up in my eyes. All hip hop illusions are thrown aside though in 'Lighters' which is unmistakably a Bruno Mars song. It's twee, it's cute, it's catchy, it'll probably get annoying in a month or two, and it's not really got that much substance. Eminem's rhymes on the track are pretty decent though. A vaguely eurodance woman introduces 'Take From Me' and for me it's probably the most solid in terms of production - it actually sounds like something is going on in the background. The duo are probably at their strongest here - "I break my back to give you my art, you steal my thoughts/ It's like driving a spike through my heart" waxes Eminem, before ending with "Farewell I bid you, but before I go, my last gift to you/ Ladies and gentleman, Slaughterhouse I give you!" in what is surely not the man hanging up the microphone.

'Loud Noises'...actually samples Anchorman. As in Brick. Shouting "Loud noises!" It's that insane. Eminem's volume is equally unhinged - the final track is actually a sign of real energy and venom rather than posing. Featuring Slaughterhouse, a trio consisting of Joe Budden, Crooked I and Joell Ortiz, it's the latter that's the most exciting in terms of flows and delivery.

It takes a while to get going but the final 3 tracks are strong enough to temporarily make you forget how clumsy the likes of 'The Reunion' are. There's just a nagging feeling that every single cuss and every single complaint, every boast and every pun has been done before. This is something for enduring fans, really - you're not going to hear anything spectacularly world-shattering or eye-opening and whilst there are a couple of good moments, it's overall another flawed concept from Eminem.

Rating: 5.5/10
Highlights: Take From Me, Loud Noises, A Kiss, Lighters
Avoid: The Reunion, Fast Lane, I'm On Everything
Artwork Watch: I quite like the speakers-as-gravestones idea, so it's a thumbs up from me. A really subtle and half-hearted thumbs up.

The Leisure Society - Into the Murky Water

2011-06-14T17:24:00.002+01:00

I was a massive fan of the Leisure Society's debut album, 'The Sleeper'. There was a layered pop element to their folk music that, in tracks as beautifully-crafted as A Matter of Time or A Short Weekend Begins With Longing, left me spellbound. The band, who hail from Brighton and London, earned two consecutive Ivor Novello nominations for "best song lyrically and musically" on The Last of the Melting Snow in 2009 and Save It For Someone Who Cares in 2010 - so it'll be interesting to see whether the follow-up has anything to rival their debut mettle.

Opening track 'Into the Murky Water' kicks off with an unusual african beat and tune that's a little bit similar to that on PJ Harvey's 'Let England Shake' earlier this year. The choruses lap into each other with brief instrumental solos inbetween, being a somewhat predictable attempt at harmony and beauty that has earned them the label of a British Fleet Foxes. On 'Dust on the Dancefloor' however they take steps away from the wistful harps and flutes and focus on a vaguely krautrock bassline, quick rhythms and a pretty infectious chorus. Never fear, folk enthusiasts, because 'Our Hearts Burn Like Damp Matches' is poised with blissful romance - the lyrics are a little indecipherable though thanks to Nick Hemming's sometimes too damp vocals.

The intro to 'You Could Keep Me Talking' sounds almost like an ABBA track with its upbeat pop tunes and barn-dance instrumentations - the repeated title for a chorus is a touch twee but the backgrounds are raucous enough to mask that. Perhaps the closest in sound to their debut, 'Although We Are All Lost' dances around gracefully with each syllable stressed as if wringing them out for every last drop.

On 'This Phantom Life' the band step outside of their comfort zone with some unusual rhythms and extended instrumental solos (although flutes and violins - you'd be daft to expect a guitar solo) as the group sing "if we only knew the answers, we could sew them onto T-Shirts". It ends triumphantly and would make a great album closer, but we've still 4 tracks to go. For me, though, the album's real crux is 'The Hungry Years' which promises "we'll all get somewhere somehow" and other such optimistic phrases - only to tear them back down again with 'I Shall Forever Remain an Amateur'. "We waited here too long", Hemming laments, but it ends pretty amicably ("although I will try").

Some have likened the band to Mumford and Sons and I guess that's fair to say in the same sense that the Sex Pistols are a bit like blink-182 because they used heavy riffs - sure, there's a country-pop element to 'Better Written Off (Than Written Down)' that evokes quintessentially British countryside vibes, but there's certainly a less obvious attempt at trying to craft every tune into a pop song. Clarinets and mandolins make an appearance, sounding at times like a Randy Newman Toy Story offering, but it's more authentic fun. Final track 'Just Like the Knife' kicks off with, yes!, some electric guitar twangs that thrust a country-western vibe at us. Take that, critics. Alas, they quickly subside for a more rural setting: "From these English coastal towns/ empty seas will drag us down" is a rather downcast note to close with but the chirpy "la la la!"s wash away any sense of misery.

It's quite fair to say that the band are never really game-changers. But there's a kind of poise and craft about their music - from the verbosity and poignancy in the lyrics to the layers of folksy instruments. Every note is stressed with a mixture of serious gravity and careless reverie that, to borrow some cliché, means this record is the perfect soundtrack for an English country fayre.

Rating: 7.5/10
Highlights: Dust on the Dancefloor, Just Like the Knife, The Hungry Years, You Could Keep Me Talking
Avoid: n/a
Artwork Watch: Pretty self-explanatory. Meh.

Beyoncé - 4

2011-06-13T21:03:00.004+01:00

For most, the leak of an album a month early to its speculated release date, the mixed reception of a lead single and the relatively poor charting position of it would spell disaster. Beyoncé makes it look like a bump in the road. Because with performances like this at the Billboard Awards, a Glastonbury headlining set to come just years after her husband's and a worldwide presence like hers the world is always left to watch in wonder. 3 years after the phenomenal I Am... Sasha Fierce, which spawned a number of singles I can't even count (including the iconic Single Ladies, the beautiful Halo and the questionable Diva), 4 is...her fourth album as a solo artist.

The album commences with guitar solos, romance and basic arithmetic on "1+1", the promotional (free) single with a preorder of the album. It's a simple, quiet and restrained musing about partnership and pure compatable bliss that'll piss off the single ladies, but oh well. The instrumentation is minimal, giving her voice time to shine - and it's not too overbearing, just soulful. This combination continues into 'I Care', with a pointedly 90s sound that's neither too sassy for the reserved audience, or too dull for the hardcore Bees.

Unfortunately, 'I Miss You' is a little too 80s. Knowles is husky throughout, with an echoed howl giving the track something of an "In the Air Tonight" feel that's probably not the desired effect. The beats are a little bit uninspired too, as though lifted from a Lumidee b-side. Again, she's vocally faultless, but when this is the norm such tracks appear rather squalid. By contrast, 'Best Thing I Never Had' has grown to be my favourite from the record - reviving the piano-cutesies of Halo or Smash Into You for an endearingly chipper take on sneering at former lovers. "Sucks to be you right now!" she taunts, making this more playful than bitter.

The starpower arrives on 'Party', including long-time collaborator Kanye West and relative newcomer (to Beyoncé's discography, at least) André 3000 (if you need me to explain he's the more extroverted one of OutKast, get out). Slick Rick and Doug. E Fresh's classic "La Di Da Di" plays in the background giving the track as classic a backdrop as the 80s synths and beats in the foreground. It's a little disappointing on first listen, but does grow to be something of a summer anthem once given time. 'Rather Die Young' sounds like a Destiny's Child hit being covered, which I guess would appeal to many but for me it feels a bit dated, quite repetitive.

'Start Over' is the first real sign of anything that's not a ballad, but still Knowles' vocals are the main attraction. The tune is quite pleasant, but again nothing spectacular. Easily the most nostalgic of the record, 'Love on Top' sounds like an early 90s Whitney Houston track without the desperate coke addict in the foreground. Backing vocals give it a kitsch edge, the chorus is full of trumpets, a Motown beat and effortless fun. Modernity eventually wins out though - 'Countdown' is a cacophony of drums in dizzying rhythms with Diplo's jerky tunes giving it a real energy. It's the album's "Get Me Bodied": silly, fun, ridiculous, fierce.

'End of Time' was leaked a while ago and will inevitably be released as a single at some point on account of its catchy chorus, gritty hooks and potential for choreographed videos that she's regarded the best at. It's got a bit of a Gloria Estefan feel to it (especially in the lines "you don't have to worry, baby, I promise I'll set your (???) free") which sounds like an awful prospect but it's Beyoncé: she can pull it off. 'I Was Here' is my second favourite ballad from the record, dabbling in the want for a legacy and achievement. Your typical "make the best out of life" lines are churned out but with a vocal tenacity that restricts the track from cheese or clichés. And then of course there's 'Run the World (Girls)' which is just phenomenal for what is essentially someone being a bit feminist over a Major Lazer song. Music videos and performances sway me, guys.

Once all of the labels are pushed to the side (performer, dancer, singer, artist, fashion icon) the record might appear to be a disappointment. Indeed, there are times when I've felt frustrated because it takes so long to get going - but by the end of these 11 (I think the smaller number of tracks than seen on Sasha Fierce might also be a problem) tracks are over you'll have been floored at least once. Even for Beyoncé, one of pop's biggest performers, there might be a struggle to find a hit single here - but in a society where Pitbull and Jennifer Lopez can grab number ones, I'm not entirely sure chart success is a good measure of even pop music any more. 4 is Beyoncé. You love it or you ignore it.

Rating: 7.5/10
Highlights: Run the World (Girls), Best Thing I Never Had, Countdown, I Was Here, End of Time, 1+1
Avoid: Rather Die Young, I Miss You
Artwork Watch: Quite sexy. Nice colouring. Blue feathers. Nudity. ARE YOU WATCHING, GAGA?

Foster the People - Torches

2011-06-10T18:32:00.002+01:00

Another day, another new indie-pop band. Only, this one is actually enjoying some commercial success - the release of this record, from the Los Angeles quintet, earned them a #8 position on the Billboard albums chart. They've done the usual route to success - performances at South by Southwest and a lot of online buzz has now resulted in the bizarre phenomenon of "bloke in Torquay, capital of cultural abandonment, has heard of them".

The opening track 'Helena Beat' is very promising indeed, a loud synth glare that's bolder and grittier than most club efforts, quickly descending into Empire of the Sun-style falsettos and indie rhythms that's very infectious indeed. Their hit single 'Pumped Up Kicks' follows and it's a very nostalgic affair, sounding a little bit like the Yeasayer fondness for simple riffs, background swishes and megaphone vocals. I'm not really as sold with this track as others on the album, it's not particularly the catchiest either.

What sounds like a robo-dog barking introduces 'Call It What You Want', a childlike chunk of reverie that's got a slight disco-funk rhythm and vocals. The lyrics reject all form of labels - "I'm in the crossfire dodging bullets from your expectancies" - reinforcing the carefree, fun vibe of the whole track. 'Don't Stop (Color on the Walls)' is a much poppier song with its repetitive chorus, joyous "woooo!"s and stop-start vocals that have given us many hits in the past. 'Waste' is a lot less riotous but still manages to pack a nice MGMT-like chorus in (see: light psychedelia, nasal vocals, a catchy beat), vowing to waste time with the special one.

Surely poised for advertising features, 'I Would Do Anything For You' again rolls out another brilliant chorus of euphoric loveliness - before an intro similar to Dizzee Rascal's "Fix Up, Look Sharp" introduces 'Houdini', their second single. It's much more electronic and loud than the rest of the album, showcasing a kind of experimental side with shrill beeps, extended drum sequences and some rather unpredictable vocals (the final section is stupidly head-boppy). You'd swear M.I.A. came up with the intro to 'Life on the Nickel', perhaps a jerky sample feeding into a nice piano tune for a nice blend of pop sensibilities and exciting rhythms (and yet another catchy chorus).

The best drums are then seen on 'Miss You', pitted against an 8-bit gaming soundtrack for one of the least conventional "I miss you" tracks you'll have heard. Closing track 'Warrant' opens with angelic voices and a dream sequence that gradually gets infiltrated with funky basslines and raucous drums, before an 80s ballad-pop piano truly cheesy send-off (think Mika covered by Battles).

It's increasingly difficult in a labyrinth of electro-indie-pop outfits to come up with a debut that'll be as memorable as it is consistent, but Foster the People have pulled off both. With Empire of the Sun out of the picture and MGMT waning, shoegaze-pop has found itself a new purveyor. The album is packed with more recognisable and solid tunes than most such bands can conjure over a career, so it'll be interesting to see (if and) where they go from here.

Rating: 8/10
Highlights: Call It What You Want, Waste, Houdini, I Would Do Anything For You, Helena Beat
Avoid: n/a
Artwork Watch: Their teeth terrify me. Absolute horror.

Simon Curtis - R∆

2011-06-09T18:59:00.003+01:00

Last year the free download of Simon Curtis' debut record, 8-Bit Heart, came as a surprise. Being free, and from a former Nickelodeon movie star, the omens were all there for a piss-poor album: but the wordplay, the slick production and daft references ("This is not a Kelly Clarkson song and not how it ends") made it...rather good. That said, there were a number of pretty average tracks that made sure it would never take off big time.

Just a year later, Curtis has already completed his sophomore album. Stylised 'R∆', RA has already spawned two singles - and it probably won't come as a shock that there's no drastic change of direction for Curtis. From the first track 'Laser Guns Up' there's robotic, repetitive vocals with a cool chorus with no real signs of emotion, diversity or a journey - and whilst catchy, it could really do with something in the way of a better hook.

Sadly this grows to be a recurring theme throughout R∆. 'Don't Dance' at least tries to vary things up with the vocals, the lyrics are again a little bit stale and repetitive. "Too many people trying to tell you what to do" he complains amongst some rather confusing attempts at wordplay ("this isn't an apology, just some reverse psychology"?) and the beat is sturdy if a bit standard. The first relatively consistent track, 'Pit of Vipers' has a nice unusual hook throughout to kind of drum in the ominosity - the lyrics are a little bit vague ("secrets run deep in a pit of vipers"; personally I'd be more worried about venom, but you know...). 'Superhero' follows and it's understandable as to why this was chosen for first single duties, with a monster chorus and clear lyrical theme.

The next two tracks are pretty poor and highly repetitive - 'D.T.M.' stands for "dead to me" and it'd probably sound pretty vicious were it not repeated about 50 times. Curtis plays bitter ex quite convincingly though and this was a theme common on his debut - songs such as Diablo have always been his strongest - but here the tune is strong but the lyrics annoying. Similarly, 'Chip in Your Head', whilst changing the vocals and returning to the interesting robot/mind-control lyrical themes, insists upon repetitive vocals that are both unimaginative and irritating. Second single 'Flesh' however is much better, with a slowburning chorus and sexual suggestions it's the perfect concoction for most current electropop hits.

The repetition returns in 'How to Start A War' where Ke$ha-stutters and about 40 "this is how"s again sully the otherwise quite catchy track. Scratches and sound effects are the early signs of a dirtier sound in 'Get In Line', a much slicker and grittier track that finally delivers a bit of the edge it promised. 'I Hate U' is similarly good, but 'Joshua' is a stand-out with its early 90s rave sounds and monologues - "I'm not who you think I am" he teases. 'Soul 4 Sale' has one of the strongest hooks and is pretty catchy, with the chorus a little bit Justin Timberlake.

There's a much more conventional dance track in 'Enemy' with a twee tune and a surrendering theme - whilst the final track 'The Dark 2: Return to the Dark' revives the pop-referencing of his debut album by copying some of Poker Face's lyrics in the opening verse, and the track is generally more dirty and euphoric than the majority of the album. Throughout there's a persistent feeling that you're waiting for something to happen, and it never really does. There are definitely highlights, and it's pretty commendable to pull off all of this himself (particularly when the majority of pop requires around 5 writers and producers per track), which ensures this is the right side of average... but only just. I'm afraid I prefer 8-Bit Heart.

Rating: 5.5/10
Highlights: Flesh, Joshua, I Hate U, Get In Line, Enemy
Avoid: D.T.M., Chip in Your Head, Don't Dance
Artwork Watch: Would've made a nice poster for the movie One Hour Photo, really.

Blondie - Panic of Girls

2011-06-08T18:34:00.004+01:00

Past-it? Sadly, yes.

There's something dreadfully treasonable about slagging off the new material from some of your musical heroes. But that said, it would be something in the way of blind faith to expect the release of Panic of Girls, Blondie's first album in 8 years, to be anything special - especially when the last one (The Curse of Blondie) was so overwhelmingly average. Even the shortest glimpse of the band's music video for their new single, 'Mother', should have ruffled a few of even the most diehard fans' feathers - just what Harry is thinking with the kind of Dolly Parton-after-a-meth-binge hair is beyond me - but enough childish digs.

The album, released via an interesting supermarket package at the end of May, begins with 'D-Day', a cold rapid synth track that could probably slot into a FIFA football soundtrack quite easily but you'd be pushed to remember it once it's over. 'What I Heard' is a touch more memorable, with a nice chorus that manages to thankfully plaster over some choice lyrics ("I've heard it all before, it's a total bore"), and is (dare I say?) quite good.

The first single from the record, 'Mother' is a distinctly Maria brand of Blondie that's not necessarily a bad thing. Ignoring the slightly dream-crushing video, the track is probably better than we could come to expect from a post-punk band in their 60s with a pretty good pop-chorus but there's a slight decline in Harry's voice that's quite obvious here (she sounds strained, whereas 'Maria' was sung with gusto). 'The End The End' is a dash of No Doubt reggae-lite with some rather out-of-it autotuned vocals that's a little bit sweet, a little bit sinister, a big bit forgettable. 'Girlie Girlie' is 'Red Red Wine's less-annoying brother, with Harry pulling off the twang worryingly easily: it's a fun song.

They return to a more typical Blondie sound in 'Love Doesn't Frighten Me' - which has a pretty solid new-wave chorus that, whilst repetitive, is a touch more reliable (and some would say bland or average) for them. "Our meeting has come to a grind" announces Debbie coolly on 'Words in My Mouth' which slowly creeps and leaves you constantly wondering "is this the chorus? No is this it?" which says a lot of its structure and direction - but vocally Harry is more in her comfort zone here and less irritating. It's just a shame the instrumentation goes nowhere. 'Sunday Smile' returns to the reggae-pop with some nice brass inclusions and a fully mellow vibe that's hard to resist but I can't help but feel that it's such a lazy attitude to take, putting out this kind of music because it's all laidback and lovely.

So the band, hearing my boredom, go for a bit of a latin-disco in 'Wipe off my Sweat'. "Papi, papi, you're the best!" Debbie coos in a squeaky autotune and the song's actually too daft not to love. It does a feel a little bit like the band are going for the most obvious European stereotypes to get an easy international hit, but perhaps that's a bit too cynical. But then there's an accordion in 'Le Bleu' that reinforces my opinion. The track is full of poise and drama and it's probably more tongue-in-cheek than serious romance, but it sounds a little more fun to record than it is to hear. The record closes with 'China Shoes' (which, thankfully, doesn't have some traditional Chinese music), a slow contemplative track that is by far the most coherent and strong on the album: "remember me, remember that you're mine" she soothes, in what's overall a very sweet slice of romance.

Altogether the album sounds a little bit like a No Doubt one... with all of the hits missing. There seems to be a bit of an attitude that because a band has put out so many genre-defining, scene-changing records, they can get away with anything - especially when the band can kind of get away with the likes of 3 star reviews from NME'S blind worship. I did fear that the record would be a whole lot worse than this though - and if 'The Curse of Blondie' was their 'Hours...' (yes I'm using a David Bowie analogy, what of it?) then 'Panic of Girls' is their 'Reality'...except it's nowhere near as good as Reality...it'd just make a nice place to finish.

Rating: 4/10
Highlights: China Shoes, Girlie Girlie, Wipe Off My Sweat, Mother, Love Doesn't Frighten Me
Avoid: What I Heard, Le Bleu, Words in my Mouth, The End The End
Artwork Watch: Arguably the most interesting thing about the record - but still not that interesting.